i Page 7274 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Evening: Let's Watch 10 Stadium Demolitions In A Row
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 27, the day we learned red wine wasn't the blood-pressure cure we thought it was. H/T to Robert for the video. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Rory McIlroy And Caroline Wozniacki Give Themselves An Insufferable Couple Nickname: Wozzilroy
If you didn't know, now you now: tennis star Caroline Wozniacki and golf star Rory McIlroy have been dating for a few months. McIlroy recently made his love official by engraving a golf club with the name "Wozzilroy," which is what they have decided we will call them. We, obviously, have decided to ...

Watching The Bengals Can Be A Fate Worse Than Death, Says Dying Bengals Fan
"Accepting that the end was near, the funny grandfather and great-grandfather said earlier in the day there was an upside to death: at least he wouldn't have to watch another Bengals loss." [Sports Grid, via Cincinnati Enquirer]...

The Curse Of Dopey "Curse Of The Bambino" References, And Other Dumb Things About The Red Sox's Stretch Run
Harvey Araton of the New York Times, reporting from Baltimore, sets the new/old standard for witless hackery today:...

Matt Kemp Poses Shirtless, Sometimes Spends Too Much On Clothes, Wants A Woman He Can Shop With
Matt Kemp, the Dodgers outfielder who counts Rihanna among his ex-girlfriends, is having an MVP-caliber season. He recently gave an interview to Flaunt magazine in which he revealed a bit about his tastes in both clothes and women....

Screw You, And Screw Your Man Card
I don't know who invented the phrase "Turn in your man card," but whoever it is should be taken out in the street and have his balls stomped on by a fucking marching band. Every Sunday, I'm now subjected to some goddamn Miller Lite ad where the guys in it are like, "ZOMG! You're drinking a generic l...

Report: Arvydas Sabonis Suffered A Heart Attack Today
There is a report that Arvydas Sabonis, the 46-year-old former Portland Trail Blazer from Lithuania, suffered a heart attack while playing basketball in Kaunas today. One translated report says that his condition is "very serious." [via @LithuaniaBasket]...

Black Hockey Player Pays The Bigotry Forward, Calls Sean Avery A "Fucking Faggot"
Just over a week ago, Wayne Simmonds—one of the few black players in the NHL—had a banana thrown at him during an exhibition game in London. Yesterday in Philadelphia, after a slight altercation during a preseason game against the Rangers at Wells Fargo Center, Simmonds allegedly called Sean Avery...

The NFL's Evolution, As Measured By Dan Dierdorfisms
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

We Remind You Once Again That Dan Shaughnessy Is Putrid
Your letters:...

Cleveland's Sunday Tailgate Scene Includes Stand-Up Trailer Blowjob And Boxer-Brief Beatdowns
This video tableau of good ol' midwestern football revelry comes from the infamous Municipal Parking Lot tailgate scene (The Muni Lot), where, as one reader says, "society devolves to its lowest point each week." The top video, courtesy of the eagle-eyed videographers /amateur pornographers at "Ma...

FC Barcelona Asks Nike For Jerseys That Won't Weigh Them Down With Their Own Sweat
Technically speaking, the Nike Dri-Fit fabric is designed to "to wick sweat away and help keep you dry and comfortable."...

Watch Jamie Dukes Be Totally Inappropriate With His Female NFL Network Co-Host (Video)
He bent over and asked her to take a snap from him. And it was incredibly awkward. Dukes recovered nicely and continued to make his point, but a short time later he ... asked again. And it was even more awkward. Idiot. [Midwest Sports Fans]...

Rihanna's Bikini Top Offends Northern Ireland Farmer In Quaintest Dispute Ever
Well, this is adorable, and certainly newsworthy: Rihanna, who has probably worn a bikini top for ninety percent of her adult life, recently had "a conversation" with a Northern Ireland farmer named Alan Graham to discuss her wardrobe. As a result of the conversation, Rihanna will probably not wea...

Some Guy In Taiwan Dropped His Daughter To Try To Catch A Baseball (Video)
He also failed to catch the ball. But he did get quite a glare from from what looks like his understandably angry wife. Who else would love to have heard him attempt to explain his stupidity and complete lack of chivalry?...

SprtsCntr: Tony Romo Became A Grown Man Last Night
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Growing Up On NFL Violence In A Violent Neighborhood
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

A Cockroach! And It Was Crawling Across The Field At Cowboys Stadium!
Your morning roundup for Sept. 27, the day we feared the Uniboob. H/T for the video to Brian. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Atlanta Braves Have Had A Rough September, According To Newspaper's Middle School Line Graph
This is a real graph that accompanied a real article in the real Atlanta Journal-Constitution today. The Braves lost to the Phillies 4-2 last night, and are now just a game ahead of the Cardinals for the NL wild card—all thanks to this carefully-plotted "September Swoon." It's really exciting that t...

The Cowboys Didn't Lose Last Night, But It Wasn't For Lack Of Trying
If you were watching the ESPN postgame last night you probably heard a lot about how Tony Romo and the Cowboys "dug deep." This is a nice way of crediting the winners of an ugly, sloppily played game, which I've reduced here to a few of its ugliest, most sloppily played moments. ...