ick Page 349 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Report: Joakim Noah And Knicks Will Be Liberated From One Another
The bitter feud between the New York Knicks and their most overpaid and underused player may be close to a resolution, per Shams Charania of The Athletic:...
Roger Goodell Is Trying His Best To Appear Woke
Kaepernick collusion case be damned, Roger Goodell is trying his best to be the corporate face of social progress for the NFL....
White-Collar Crime Is Apparently Not Enough To Halt An NFL Career
After pleading guilty to federal charges of insider trading, linebacker Mychal Kendricks will be sentenced in January of next year. That doesn’t mean he can’t still continue his side hustle as a pro football player, though....
I Did Not Buy 6,500 Pairs Of Nikes To Send To The Dump, But Thousands Of Idiots Think I Did
First off, let’s get something out of the way: I did not purchase $1.3 million dollars’ worth of Nike Air VaporMaxes (White/Varsity Purple/Metallic Silver/Aqua, size 9.5) with the intent of shipping them to the Glendale city dump....
How Celebrity Nutritionist Alan Aragon Used His Status To Prey On Young Women
This May, Carolina Belmares traveled to Kansas City to attend the 2018 Fitness Summit, an annual conference that was co-headlined by nutritionist and author Alan Aragon. Belmares says she was looking forward to the event as a way to build relationships with other people in the industry, noting the “...
There Is Nothing More American Than Burning Your Dumb Sneakers
“Calling a dream crazy is not an insult,” Colin Kaepernick says during a two-minute ad that Nike rolled out last Wednesday. “It’s a compliment.” It’s one of many perfectly circular blobules of aspiration that Kaepernick delivers in stop-and-go voiceover throughout the ad, and in that context and the...
I Dressed Like Bill Belichick For A Day In Hopes Of Learning What It Feels Like to Win
This week, Deadspin and Jezebel swap beats to celebrate America’s most dangerous and controversial pastimes: football and fashion, two sports that have far more in common than you think....
Nicklas Bendtner Decked A Cabbie And Broke His Jaw
Former Arsenal player and cult-favorite shithead Nicklas Bendtner famously once unbuckled his pants, rubbed his junk up against a taxi, and then spanked the presumably titillated but bewildered vehicle with his just-removed belt in a fit of anger aimed at the cab’s driver. On Sunday, Bendtner was on...
Team No Trade Gronk. No Trade! Make Gronk Sad.
Rob Gronkowski’s offseason of uncertainty ended with the lovable galoot coming back to the Patriots on a reworked, healthier contract, for at least one more run at a championship with Bill Belichick and Tom Brady. Part of Gronk’s existential mulling seems to have come from disillusionment with the P...
Report: NFL Will Not Have National Anthem Policy This Season
Back in May, NFL owners terrified of Donald Trump approved a new jingoistic national anthem policy decreeing that “all league and team personnel shall stand and show respect for the flag and the Anthem,” before games. The new rule essentially banned any kind of visible protest—such as Colin Kaeperni...
This New Sack Rule Is Going To Drive Me Insane
The NFL’s confusing new helmet rule drew plenty of deserved attention and criticism during the preseason, but for all the plays and games it is going to muddy up, it is not the worst rule change implemented by the NFL this season. That honor belongs to the rule that heavily penalizes defensive playe...
The Eagles Successfully Ran The Play That Tom Brady Couldn't Complete In The Super Bowl
The Eagles’ offense had basically done nothing all night. They were booed at halftime in the first game of the NFL season. But in the third quarter, the team faced a third down in Falcons territory, so what did they do? They ran the trick play the Patriots failed to execute in the Super Bowl....
Toilet President Goes Easy On Nike For Endorsing Colin Kaepernick: "They Pay A Lot Of Rent"
Hey, remember when the oven-baked ham in chief called NFL players who protest institutional racism and police brutality during pregame national anthem ceremonies sons of bitches, and said they should be fired? Remember how he’s humped that issue relentlessly, using it to lather up the worst dregs of...
José Abreu Needed Emergency Surgery To Save A "Strangled" Testicle
White Sox first baseman José Abreu hasn’t played in a couple weeks, a result of an ambiguous outpatient “lower abdominal surgery” he reportedly underwent on August 20. Hernioplasty? Appendectomy? A testicle that twisted around and became tangled up in its own [passes out cold]:...
Vandals Turn Idyllic Hillside Bicycle Sculpture Into Idyllic Hillside Dick Sculpture
A small town in Devon, England called Ilfracombe decorated its Capstone Hill with a bicycle made out of recycled plastic and other materials, to celebrate both the Tour de Britain, which is happening right now, and the region’s efforts to reduce the use of plastic. Then some vandals went and turned ...
U.S. Open Fan Who Dunked Chicken Tender Into Soda: "People Are Telling Me I Should Go To Jail"
The most repulsive thing at the U.S. Open this weekend wasn’t John Millman’s shirt or Tennys Sandgren’s personality, but this chicken tender dipped into a soda by a woman in the stands. Fox 5 found Alexa Greenfield, the bold flavor revolutionary (or gross weirdo, depending on your worldview) and got...
People Are Destroying Their Nike Gear Because Of Colin Kaepernick
Colin Kaepernick is the new face of a Nike ad campaign. As you might imagine, this has really angered the type of people who have said, “I’m a Christian first, and a conservative second” out loud at the dinner table. And if there’s one thing you can expect from these people, it’s that they will go a...
Now Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Is Calling Out The NFL Over Colin Kaepernick
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the former president of Iran and a man of many sports takes, has now come to the defense of Colin Kaepernick, the out-of-work quarterback....