ick Page 638 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dirk Nowitzki Can't Escape The Crazy
Dirk Nowitzki has filed for sole custody of the child that might not be his, while his ex-girlfriend is under FBI investigation for threatening his attorney from jail. It's all one big ball of crazy....

ESPNUSGA Could Really Use Some Comment Ninjas....
Mickelson, right now, is tied for 5th at -1. Tiger went astray. Peter Hanson is in the lead...[USOPEN.com]...

Damon, Swisher Continue Their Cunnilingual Rock N' Roll Party
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Rick Reilly Before He Was Rick Reilly®
Once upon a time, before he was a walking Father's Day card, before his writing became a neverending telethon for the blind and the deaf, the palsied and the pinkieless, the one-armed and the no-legged, Rick Reilly was really good....

The U.S. Open Is Open For Business
You were probably hoping that following the U.S. Open online would be a nice distraction from work today, but they just suspended play due to heavy rain. Hey, who wants to hear Tiger Woods cuss on teevee?...

Detroit Just Can't Catch A Break
A Game 7 loss, a series dropped to the Pirates, now Bill Laimbeer—the greatest coach in WNBA history!—is stepping down. He will be replaced by Rick Mahorn, who will eventually be replaced by Chuck Nevitt. [Free Press]...

Nice Knowing You, Loud Tennis Grunter People
Tennis fans have enough crazy to distract them — crazy fans, crazy parents, Damir Dokic — so it makes complete sense for the International Tennis Federation to consider further penalizing the plain-old crazy grunters....

Brandon Jennings Is Just Being Real About Ricky Rubio (Updated)
Who does Ricky Rubio think he is? The best point guard in the NBA Draft? A Spaniard? Spare me, says Brandon Jennings, who can't even front when it comes to hating on his European brethren....

Everybody Pile On D.J. Mbenga
First, Rudy Gay called him "ugly", then Reggie Miller revealed on the Dan Patrick show his text to Barkley after Lakers victory: "can you believe that DJ Mbenga and Adam Morrison have rings?"...

Pitino Speaks: "If I Can Get Through 9/11, I Can Get Through Anything"
Rick Pitino met with the media today and kinda-sorta addressed the Karen Sypher extortion case. Naturally, talk turned to 9/11....

The Stupid Derrick Rose Controversy
So Derrick Rose once flashed gang signs in a smoky room. With his apology, it's now, officially, a "controversy," a term of art allowing media-types to avoid saying what the story's really about, which is essentially this: scary black people....

Falcons Officially Release Michael Vick
I don't understand. Did he do something wrong? [ESPN]...

Mets Fans Are A Bunch Of Decrepit Old Dudes, Poll Finds
Bad news, Mets: Women and anyone younger than 45 hate your guts. It's true! The New York Times took a poll....

Nicklas Lidstrom's Busted Ballsack And Other Tales Of NHL Woe
If Detroit captain Nicklas Lidstrom looked a little sluggish at times during this Stanley Cup Finals, he has a very, very, very good excuse. He suffered a "nearly catastrophic" testicle injury in the Conference Finals. Now how do you feel?...

Deadspin I-Team: What Exactly Is Johnny Damon Trying To Communicate Here?
This is how Johnny Damon chose to celebrate teammate Nick Swisher's home run on Monday against the Rays. We've seen this before, of course. Still, the mystery remains: What ever could this gesture mean? The I-Team is on the case....

Driver Of Nick Adenhart's Car Was Also Drunk
A toxicology report on Courtney Stewart, the young woman who was killed along with Angels pitcher Nick Adenhart in an April car crash, reveals that Stewart—who was behind the wheel of Adenhart's car—was legally drunk at the time....

UCLA QB Announces Transfer Via Bizarre Press Release
Fact: A redshirt sophomore named Chris Forcier is leaving UCLA to play ball at Furman. Fact: His family decided to announce the move with one of the more batshit loony press releases you'll ever read....

The Washington Huskies Revival Will Be Led By Joe Montana's Son
Tough call for Nick Montana: Charlie Weis' Notre Dame or winless Washington? Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, catch a Huskie by the toe, my father told me to pick the best one and that is Y-O-U-W. [Seattle Times]...

Great Moments In Counterfactual History: Derrick Rose’s SAT Scores
Nobody seems to care all that much that Memphis basketball players Derrick Rose and Robert Dozier allegedly cheated on their SATs. But what might have happened if the news had come out a little sooner?...

Guest-Editing A Sports Blog Is Like Flossing A Crocodile
Hi, my name is Josh and I'm the sports editor at Slate. You may remember me from such counterintuitive articles as "Joe Buck: American hero" and "Jason McElwain: He's probably not autistic, and that other team sucked at defense anyway."...