ick Page 645 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Where In The Heck Is Stephon Marbury?
Seriously, now ... what the heck is going on with the Knicks and Stephon Marbury? One would think, after a team gives a job to the woman you humped in the back of your truck, you'd have a little gratitude. No loyalty in this world, we tell you....
Bill Belichick Is A Surly Dick
Michael Showalter is one of the minds behind The State and Stella and the writer and star of the films Wet Hot American Summer and The Baxter. We're a fan. He also, apparently, is a sports fan. To promote his new album Sandwiches And Cats, he's doing a pseudo tour of the various lousy blogs like our...
Dick Nolan, Rest In Peace
Before Ronnie Lott and Joe Montana and Jerry Rice, there was a plucky band of guys in shiny gold pants with names like John Brodie, Gene Washington and Cedrick Hardman. Many don't remember that it wasn't Bill Walsh who put the San Francisco 49ers on the map; it was Dick Nolan. He was the first coach...
Heat Find A Way To Suck Even In Victory
The Miami Heat hadn't won a game since April 13, and that includes this preseason. So when Jason Williams hit a jumper wirg 19 seconds remaining in the game to give them 75 points, it looked like another loss; the sixth straight of the regularseason. But no! The Knicks — God bless 'em — onloy scored...
Jeremy Roenick Doesn't Daydream; He's Too Busy Giving Other People Nightmares
• And I'm Not Even Counting The Wraparounds. Nineteen years after he scored his first NHL goal, Jeremy Roenick finally netted number 500 in the Sharks' 4-1 victory over the Coyotes. J.R. became just the third American-born player to reach 500 goals, and ranks 40th in goals and 44th in points on the ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as the Devil Rays cut their name in half ... • College football: Rutgers at Army. Scarlet Knights vs. Black Knights. Who ya got? [ESPN2] • Golf: PGA European Tour/PGA Tour of Australasia, HSBC Champions, third round, Shanghai. Australasia? You lost me. [The Golf Channel] • NBA: Denver ...
Manute Bol And Spud Webb Can Sell Chicken
We're not going to harp on this, and we're not going to try to steal their luster, so we're just gonna beg you to sprint over to Wizznutzz and check out what is truly "the greatest piece of sports memorabilia of all time....
Jamboroo, Week 10: Featuring Marmalard, A—hole Doctors, Depressed Bunnies, Goldfish, And Lots Of Other Stupid S—t
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....
Marbury Wants You To Know That Only He Sells Cheapass Shoes
Considering he has testified under oath that he had sex with a Knicks intern in his car — and then helped get her a better job! — Stephon Marbury needs all the good PR he can get. Hence, those cheap sneakers he sells, which help inner city kids become more like Stephon Marbury, which is totally a go...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after your wedgie attempts are thwarted ... • College football: Central Michigan at Western Michigan. What the old-timers call "The Battle Between Those Two Teams From Michigan Whose Mascots We Can't Quite Recall." [ESPN] • Boxing: Middleweights, Sakio Bika (22-3-2) vs. Jaidon Codringt...
Tickets Prices At Fenway Have Increased Somewhat
A reader, digging through some of their dad's old things, found a relic from the mid-80s that couldn't be more dated than if it showed a picture of Flock of Seagulls....
Anything That Doesn't Require Watching The Game
By the way, athletes are always being hammered for having "contract years," in which they play harder when they know they're going to be a free agent. Shouldn't Brian Billick have to give back part of the contract extension he got last year? That team's offense has never, ever gotten better, and now...
The Mavericks Invite You To Eat Their Dust
Those of you constantly demanding to see Dirk Nowitzki leaning out of a car window while taking a lap at the Texas Motor Speedway can stop your letters and e-mails: Your wish has finally been granted. Of course now that I see it, I have the urge to jump in the car and take my dog for a drive. Come'...
Isiah, Knicks Manage To Stay Out Of Trouble For A Day
Ed. note: This was supposed to go up this morning, but better late than never.• Are You Going To Get In The Truck? First our Isiah Thomas quote of the day: "It's always good to win your home opener, and for us here in New York we struggled last year at the start of the season at home,'' Thomas said....
Jamboroo, Week 9: The Budding Legend Of Derek "Horse Balls" Anderson
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....
Cleveland Does Not Rock
• Curse Of The Yankees Lid. LeBron James supposed it was good, harmless fun to sport a Yankees' cap during the American League playoffs, but now that bad karma is coming back to bite him on the ass. If, you know, karma has teeth. James suffered through the only non-scoring first half of his NBA care...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as local punks egg your car ... • NBA: Dallas at Cleveland; Seattle at Denver. No Jub Jub? [ESPN] • NHL: Hurricanes at Panthers. Baby it's cold inside. [Fox Sports] • Movie: Poltergeist. You moved the headstones but you didn't move the bodies! You didn't move the bodies! [ABC FAM]...
Oh, Those New York Knickerbockers
Sadly, we haven't had the joy yet of watching the Knicks play — they open in Cleveland on Friday — but that doesn't mean we can't relive the glory of the last 10 years of beautiful Knicks history....
Ricky Williams Will Meditate With You
In case you were wondering how Ricky Williams is keeping himself busy these days, he is of course indulging his true passion. No, not that passion: The other one....
Sorry: You Just Can't Do This
A tip for all you kids out there still undecided about your Halloween costume: Just because Michael Vick is going to jail doesn't mean you can dress up in blackface....