ii Page 78 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
New Orleans Welcomes The Super Bowl With A "Roger Goodell Being Eaten By A Giant Vagina" Float
The Krewe du Vieux is one of the first parades on the Carnival calendar, and surely the most explicit. The Times-Picayune says it "aims for eyebrow-raising, low-brow amusement and often hits the mark with its rude designs and naughty details." But topicality is important, and with Roger Goodell comi...
John L. Smith, Who Succeeded Bobby Petrino At Arkansas, Will Spend Next Year Coaching A Terrible DII School For About 8% Of His Old Salary
Arkansas's John L. Smith was one of the more colorful characters of this past college football season. The coach of an awful football team whose location he couldn't quite remember, Smith had very little money in the bank as of September, and negative $40 million as of October. Through it all, Smith...
Roger Goodell Thinks That Robert Griffin III Knee Injury Saga Played Out Just Fine
The problem with football players is that they they're born not wanting to act in their own best interests, especially with regards to their long-term health. That's why they play football. In theory, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell would be acting in his own best interest by acting in theirs—after ...
Save The Black Quarterback
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season....
"How Much Do You Blame Jay Cutler For RGIII's Injury?" Was An Actual Topic Of Conversation On <em>SportsNation</em>
ESPN's SportsNation relocated to California a few weeks ago, but it seems the absurdity of the program didn't depart along with the WWL's top sociocultural critic. We're sure this conversation was chock-full of unique and intelligent insights....
The Health Of An NFL Player Belongs To Everyone But The Player Himself
"Greatness is not given," Robert Griffin III says in his national Gatorade spot. "Greatness is taken, when the weak and distracted are resting on their reputations."...
This Is The Face Of A Man Who Earned His First Technical Foul In Six Years
Georgetown coach John Thompson III earned his first technical in six years last night, reacting to a questionable foul call on Nate Lubick in the second half of an embarrassing home blowout loss to Pitt. The 19th-ranked Hoyas fell to 0-2 in the Big East with a 73-45 loss to the Panthers, but it was...
Report: Robert Griffin III's Knee Requires "Total Reconstruction" Surgery; Recovery Expected To Take Six To Eight Months
Though an initial report suggested Robert Griffin III had partially torn both the anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) and lateral cruciate ligament (LCL) in the world's-most-talked-about right knee, ESPN's Chris Mortensen now says sources are telling him the damage is in fact worse: Griffin actually su...
In Defense Of Mike Shanahan
Three months ago, the head coach of a professional football team made a terrible, terrible decision. On Sept. 30, up by a point with less than two minutes to go, Carolina's Ron Rivera decided to punt the ball away to the Atlanta Falcons, even though it was fourth-and-1, even though his team was on A...
MRI Shows Robert Griffin III Has Partially Torn ACL, LCL
After the Fred Smoot-reported kneepocalypse, we finally have an actual report on the state of RG3's injury. The Washington Post cites sources who have seen the test results, and says the MRI indicates Griffin has partial tears of his anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) and lateral collateral ligament (...
Fred Smoot Is The One Spreading All Those Rumors About Robert Griffin III's Shredded Knee
The world is eager for word on the condition of Robert Griffin III's knee, which he injured thanks to either his coach or his field or maybe the terms of Dan Snyder's deal with the devil. Mike Shanahan was less than forthcoming at his press conference today, so it's up to the DC-area media to get to...
Rob Parker: <em>First Take</em> Producers Knew What I Was Going To Talk About
Rob Parker's suspension for asking if Robert Griffin III was a "brother or a cornball brother" ends in a week or so and 1.) he really doesn't seem that sorry about what happened and 2.) he says First Take producers knew what he had to say....
The Redskins Were Done In By Their Own "Crappy" Field
Here's Pierre Garcon, on the soupy, sloppy, green-painted dirt that passes for grass between the hash marks at FedEx Field:...
Robert Griffin III Twisted His Knee On A Dead Patch Of Sports Language
LANDOVER, Md.—After the Redskins' 24-14 playoff loss to the Seahawks, Washington's players and head coach talked about the "difference between being injured and being hurt," the importance of being there for your teammates, and how, in the words of Robert Griffin III, "you have to step up and be a m...
Dr. James Andrews For Head Coach: Seahawks-Redskins, In Five GIFs
Seattle 24, Washington 14: It's fair to debate Mike Shanahan's decision to keep a hobbled Robert Griffin III in the game today: For much of the first half, it looked like a gamble in the process of paying off, and Griffin has been so stellar for so much of this year that it's hard to imagine Kirk C...
Mike Shanahan Lied When He Said That A Doctor Cleared Robert Griffin III To Play After He Sprained His Knee In Week 14
During Washington's 31-28 victory over the the Ravens five weeks ago, Haloti Ngata brought down Robert Griffin III during the fourth quarter, leaving Griffin limping. Griffin sat out one play, then returned for four more, going 2/3 and advancing Washington to the Baltimore 16 before intentionally gr...
Moose Chasing Someone Skiing? Moose Chasing Someone Skiing.
Sometime around Christmas, somewhere on a slope at Sugarbush, a ski resort in Vermont. Moose chasing someone skiing....
What Would Jesus Do About A Gay Teammate? A Christian Response To Torii Hunter's Comments
"For me, as a Christian … I will be uncomfortable because in all my teachings and all my learning, biblically, it's not right."—Torii Hunter, quoted in the Los Angeles Times, on having an out gay teammate....
Torii Hunter Says Homosexuality Is "Not Right" (Then Claims He Was Misquoted)
On Saturday, Kevin Baxter of the Los Angeles Times wrote a column about the obstacles that a potentially gay athlete still faces in today's locker room culture. Included in the piece is the following quote from Detroit Tigers center fielder Torii Hunter:...