il Page 1533 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
An Action-Packed Evening In Philadelphia With Exploding Faces And Slippery Chases
Cole Hamels finally gets a win. Werth hits a homer that smacks a lady in the face. A kid ran onto the field. At the end of it all — still first place. [The700Level]...
Feuding Reporters Briefly Enliven Terrible Cavs-Hawks Series
NBA playoffs-related journalist slap-fight!...
Bill Plaschke Finally Vindicated By Manny Ramirez Suspension
There is a silver lining to be found in this Manny Ramirez mess—L.A. Times columnist Bill Plaschke can finally say "I told you so!" Manny duped a lot of people, but not this guy!...
Manny Ramirez Is Now Very Fertile
"Two sources told ESPN's T.J. Quinn and Mark Fainaru-Wada that the drug used by Ramirez is hCG—human chorionic gonadotropin....a women's fertility drug typically used by steroid users to restart their body's natural testosterone production." [ESPN]...
Manny Ramirez Releases His Statement On Suspension
Manny Ramirez released a statement [opens in PDF] saying that the positive test comes from a medication that was prescribed to him by a doctor for a legitimate medical issue. [Los Angeles Times]...
Manny Ramirez Fails Performance-Enhancing Drug Test
Manny Ramirez has failed a performance-enhancing drug test and has been suspended 50 games, effective immediately. Well ... I guess that's everyone! (Lots, lots more to come, obviously.)...
Soccer Player Killed By Lightning, Then Goes On With His Life
Here's another story of deceased soccer fans, only this one has a happy ending, because the kid in question was lucky enough to be raised from the dead....
How A Softball Almost Killed This Man's Foot
A good portion of Americans join softball leagues this time of the year. Many do it for the social aspect alone, which leaves many teams stockpiled with players who are ridiculously awful....
Local Baby Unimpressed By Heisman Winner's Wristband Collection
Legend says that anyone who touches Tim Tebow before their first birthday gets free tuition at Florida. More notable: Tebow is wearing seven inspirational wristbands (and a rubber band)! Live strong, indeed. [The Smiths]...
Phoenix Coyotes Go Bankrupt, Forget To Tell NHL
Remember when the Jets left Winnipeg for Phoenix and everyone said, "Real smart! Putting a hockey team in the desert!" Yeah, they're probably on the way back to Canada with their tail between their legs....
Meet The Woman Who Saved Zack Greinke From Himself
Her name is Emily Kuchar. She is engaged to Greinke. According to him, she's the cool, refreshing Peach Daiquiri that keeps the Greinke crazy straw stirring. [MLB.com]...
This Is What A Boston College Education Is Worth
Before beginning, I should reiterate that B.J. Raji does not smoke pot. Of course, if he did fill his head with sweet smoke that might explain why he can't spell his own school's war cry....
Is It Hot In Here Or Is My Head On Fire?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Sorry Ladies: Bruce Pearl Is Off The Market!
Hearts are a-breakin' all across the Smokies today as Bruce Pearl has announced that he's affianced to lady friend Brandy Miller. Do they sell creamsicle-colored tuxedo shirts? [Knoxville News Sentinel]...
Trevor Hoffman's Music Scares The Crap Out Of Ken Macha
The Brewers manager says he hides in the bathroom when his closer enters the game, because Hoffman's entrance music is just too darn loud. Or maybe it's the new Japanese seat warmers? [ESPN; game notes]...
Warm Your Butt In The Dice-K Memorial Bathrooms
The Boston Red Sox paid the Seibu Lions $51.1 million for the right to take Daisuke Matsuzaka off their hands. So what did they do with the money? New toilet seats for everyone!...
And The 2009 Brian Baldinger Award Goes To...Torry Holt
The former Rams' wide receiver instills confidence in his catching ability in front of a confused Jacksonville press corps. [With Leather]...
And The Mets/Phillies Weekend Yields Predictable Results
Come on, Philly people. Don't throw fucking bottles. [The700Level]...
One Cowboys' Scouting Assistant Paralyzed Due To Practice Facility Collapse
Two other staffers also required surgery to mend their broken body parts. Jerry Jones was reported to be "somber" after hearing the news. [AP/LA Times]...
ESPNU/Time Warner Cable Experiencing Technical Difficulties, Porn (NSFW)
There can't be that many people watching ESPNU at 3:17AM, but on Saturday there was at least one, and he got a little surprise while hunting for a late-night sports fix (very NSFW)....