il Page 1609 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Introducing The ESPN Accountability Record
In the wake of Le Anne Schreiber's dead-on column this week, we got to thinking about ESPN's much-ballyhooed Corrections Page. Remember that? How it was going to be a regular documentation of all ESPN mistakes, standing accountable? Well, it hasn't quite turned out that way....

Swim, You Brave, Magnificent Bastards! Swim!
OK, I can hear you complaining already. But the fact remains that I have lived most of my adult life by one simple rule: Anytime a game fish reenacts a scene from one of my favorite movies, it gets its own post. The movie is Shawshank Redemption, and this is one of those times....

Greatest 'NBA Closer' In The History Of Western Civilization!
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores, he can be heard on The Basketball Jo— Shut it down, little man. Shut it DOWN! What a pathetic performance by this sad human being. This guy is a disgrace to the game of basketball a...

Rick Reilly Makes Eight Times As Much Money As Jonathan Papelbon
As Sussman put it, ESPN filled its "Badly Needed Smart-Alecky Middle-Aged White Guy Quota" by hiring Sports Illustrated's Rick Reilly, who filed his last SI column a couple of weeks ago. He won't start until June 1 of next year, which should give him plenty of time to hone those "multimedia" skills....

SHOTY Elite Eight: Elijah Dukes Vs. Gilbert Arenas
At last, we have completed the endless first round of the 2007 Sportshuman Of The Year tournament. It only took a month. Now we're down the nitty-gritty: The Elite Eight....

Football Night In Baltimore
The Colts return to Baltimore face the Ravens in the city birthed them. They should expect to be greeted by large groups of confused men wearing purple camouflage and the women that love them because they don't know any better. Enjoy the game, I just realized the Wizards were playing tonight so I'v...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering if you'll ever stop squinting... • NFL: Indianapolis at Baltimore. Take a shot every time they say "Mayflower" to make the game tolerable. [NBC] • Movie: Rocky IV. Brett Myers wouldn't take that shit from Adrian.ESPN Classic] • Movie: Meet John Doe. Alright, but if he's...

Terry Bradshaw Can't Stand Up Right Now
• Jillian Barberie gives Terry Bradshaw a pity kiss. He'll take what he can get. [Awful Announcing] • The Seahawks are embracing their community through the 12th Man [The Love of Sports] • Yes, that's one reason to hate Duke fans. We'll be waiting for the next 99. [The Blue Zone] • Wade Boggs is ...

Overtime and Gambling Make Wonderful Bedfellows
Since there's way too much going on in the NFL for me to get caught up in wordy prose I'm going to switch it up to a bullet point format. It's creative, it's original, and nobody's ever done it before! • Why can't our country produce fifteen people capable of providing the play-by-play for football ...

Scary Morning In Indianapolis
Early this morning a series of gunshots were fired into the car of Indiana Pacers guard Jamaal Tinsley wounding Joey Qatato, the team's equipment manager. The Indy Star has the full story....

Scary Morning In Indianapolis
Early this morning a series of gunshots were fired into the car of Indiana Pacers guard Jamaal Tinsley wounding Joey Qatato, the team's equipment manager. The Indy Star has the full story...

No Isiah, They Aren't Saying Boo-urns
It's not easy making the Philadelphia 76ers look good, but Isiah's Knicks do it with aplomb. I don't want to say that New York's starters aren't any good, but seeing as how they combined to score 25 points my hands are tied. New York's starters fucking suck (but Q's cool). Nate "Awww" Robinson manag...

Turning A Weary Eye Towards Football
• 1:00 or 4:00 — NFL: FOX Distribution Map [FOX] • 1:00 and 4:00 — NFL: CBS Distribution Maps: Early and Late [CBS] • 1:00 — Movie: Big Trouble [Comedy Central] • 2:30 — Soccer: Serie A, Milan vs. Torino [FSC] • 2:30 — Dog Show!: Pro-Plan Champions Cup [ESPN] • 3:00 — Movie: Lean on Me [BET] • 4:00 ...

Bayless Overcomes Slow Start, Puts Illini Away In OT
It was never pretty, but Arizona's defeat of Illinois in Chicago was certainly entertaining. The Wildcats were downright dreadful in the game's opening minutes, but hey, time differences are a bitch! After being held scoreless for nearly five minutes Lute Olsen's Kevin O'Neill's squad regrouped and ...

Tebow Wins Heisman, Loves Jesus
I didn't watch the Heisman Trophy presentation show (what's the point?) but I've been assured that Tim Tebow did in fact win. As a Gator fan of some 20 years I'm quite happy for Superman, but I'm not going to bludgeon you over the head with my homerism the way Tebow does with all of that god talk. O...

Mayweather Disposes of Hatton In 10
Floyd Mayweather Jr. is simply better than everybody else on the planet, and now even the Brits have to admit that. In front of a raucous crowd high rollers, A-list celebrities, and Manchester's loudest drunks (that's a compliment!) Mayweather went toe-to-toe with the previously undefeated Ricky Hat...

About Last Night
What you missed while discovering that White Russians and red wine make for a diabolical combination... • NBA: Josh Howard and Deron Williams put on a spectacular display of point accumulation. • CBB: Dayton stuns Louisville while my guitar Flubby gently weeps. • Boxing: Floyd Mayweathe, you magnifi...

Pretty Boy Is Going to Dominate
It should come as no surprise that I'm putting my support—and money—behind the best boxer on the planet, Floyd Mayweather Jr. The fight has never been short on storylines or hype, but when when Ricky Hatton sets foot in the ring with Mayweather he will simply be outclassed. The challenger makes for ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering just how the hell Steve McNair got caught up in all of this business... • Floyd Mayweather vs. Ricky Hatton for the Ring Magazine Welterweight Championship. This will be fun, especially if you've been drinking and/or gambling!. [HBO] • Heisman Trophy Presentation Show. ...

No Need to Wait For Heisman Results
Why slog through the pre-packaged Heisman presentation show at 8 pm when you can just check the exit polls? It's not as if you'll wait for your November 3rd newspaper to find out who won the presidential election, you'd just check the exit polls. Fortunately a website out there in the vast internet...