il Page 1622 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Pitching Coach Fails In Escape From Tropicana Field
This man is Jim Hickey, the pitching coach for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. As you'd expect, life as the pitching coach of the Devil Rays — sorry: Tampa Bay Rays — is not easy. It's enough to drive a man to drink....
The Bitches Get Isiah Again
Isiah Thomas, just can't catch a break, you know? It's now official: The jury has found against Isiah and the Knicks in the sexual harassment suit....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while, on PBS, Eisenhower finally decides to invade Normandy ... • NFL: New England at Cincinnati. Your fantasy team has 3 total points, because most of your roster plays tonight. [ESPN] • Rugby: World Cup, South Africa vs. U.S. What happens in the scrum, stays in the scrum. [Versus] •...
And So The Great 21st Century Grill Wars Have Begun
As you have probably noted in your personal journal, a little while back we called for someone, anyone, to give Evander Holyfield a grill endorsement. Well, someone was listening. Introducing the Evander Holyfield Real Deal Grill, which hit stores last week, and is meant as a direct competitor to Ge...
Mourn The Mets
Before we commence burying the Mets' and their historic collapse, let's take a moment and congratulate the Phillies, who had to earn their way here. (Daulerio was at the game in Philly yesterday and we're pretty sure Victorino got him with that water hose.) The Phillies will be incredibly fun to wat...
Rocky Mountain High (In Colorado)
As Tuco said when he got the drop on Clint Eastwood in The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, "There are two kinds of spurs, my friend. Those that come in by the door [crosses himself], and those that come in by the window." The Rockies came in the latter way, beating the Diamondbacks 4-3 on Sunday to forc...
Phillies Just Sank Mets' Jengajam
As most of you have already seen, Tom Glavine's outing today didn't last too long — maybe he was double parked? — as the Florida Marlins lit up Mr. 300 with seven runs in the first inning en-route to an 8-1 win. With that, they needed Philadelphia to lose and force a tie. They've been counting on Ph...
If There Is An Allah, He'll Permit A Four-Way Tie
Whenever I see a baseball fight late in the season, I picture Colin Mochrie in front of a green screen trying to figure out what's going on, saying "Well, it all started over a bowl of soup! And now ... look at it!"...
Congratulations, Chicago Prepubescent Bears
What happens when Lou Piniella has nothing else to yell about? Does he grumble that the champagne isn't Korbel? If it is Korbel, does he kvetch that it's not another brand name bubbly? Does he still find some way to throw his hat and choke a child? We may never know the answer, because we're too laz...
Your National League Clusterphooey
All due respect to the playoffs next week, but we can't fathom a much more exciting turkeyshoot than the National League this weekend. We're three days away from the end of the season, and not a single team has clinched, with seven still in the chase. It's insane....
Our (Brief) Interview With Gilbert Arenas
Yesterday, on invitation from the fine folks at EA Sports, we talked to Wizards zuperstar Gilbert Arenas at the NBA Store in Manhattan for exactly seven minutes and 16 seconds. Here's a complete, exact transcript of the interview, which was almost entirely about his blog. We didn't take a picture, b...
Two NL East Ballparks, Exactly Opposite
We were at Shea Stadium last night, wearing our Rick Ankiel jersey, of course, and we noted that we were 100 percent unmolested. We chalk this up partly to the fact that Mets fans are about 60 times nicer to visiting fans than Yankees fans, but mostly, Shea Stadium was a morgue last night. The Cardi...
Taste The Rockies, Losers! Taste Them!
The Colorado Rockies need a theme song! After beating the Dodgers on Thursday for their 11th straight win — the longest winning streak in the majors this season — they are on the verge of making the playoffs for only the second time in their history. The Rockies are one game out in the wild-card rac...
Congratulations, New York Yankees (Kind Of)
We're not sure what we can add to this photo. It's all yours. But we are curious: Wasn't it a little weird to see the Yankees celebrating so manically?...
Of Course; Electric Skates! We'd Be Idiots Not To Try Them!
Introducing, the Therma Blade! Battery-warmed skates that melt the ice to provide more speed. Wayne Gretzky endorses them, so that's something, right? However the first thing that caught my eye about this item — and it may be a telling metaphor — is that the bottom half of the above photo distinctly...
Ladies, Line Up For Roy Williams
Lions wide receiver Roy Williams is making $1,515,000 this year, which is actually a little less than you might think, considering Jon Kitna is being paid $5 million. Therefore, Williams, under such obvious financial constraints, has to keep a close eye on his bottom line. That is to say: He's amazi...
Hug It Out, Yankees; You're In The Playoffs
OK, who looked more lifelike: Castro in his latest speech; bin Laden in his last taped address; or George Steinbrenner during Wednesday's Yankees game? They dusted off the long-dead owner, propped him up in a luxury box and had him "watch" New York clinch a playoff berth on Wednesday, the Yankees be...