il Page 964 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Diving Venue Water Has Not Improved
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<i>SI</i>'s Peter King: I Like To Eat Diarrhea, It's Good, Mmm, Gimme That Hot Diarrhea With Onions
Here is Peter King, a face drawn on the side of Roger Goodell’s hand, telling you two ways that he likes to eat diarrhea. He likes to eat diarrhea on top of spaghetti with onions and cheese, and he likes to eat diarrhea on a hot dog, also with onions, but with no mustard....
Why Your Team Sucks 2016: Philadelphia Eagles<em></em>
Some people are fans of the Philadelphia Eagles. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Philadelphia Eagles. This 2016 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here. And buy Drew’s new book here....
Wichita State Basketball Coach Gregg Marshall Flips The Hell Out During Exhibition Game
The Wichita State Shockers played an exhibition game against McGill University in Montreal yesterday, a meaningless game that was supposed to be played at half-speed and produce zero headlines. Neither of those things happened....
Remember When Prince Fielder Slapped An Inside-The-Park Home Run?
According to Ken Rosenthal, the Rangers will announce tomorrow that Prince Fielder is going to retire. Fielder had neck surgery a few weeks ago, and it’s apparently going to keep him from playing again. He will retire with 319 dingers, exactly the same amount as his father Cecil had in his career....
I Killed My Own Book Proposal By Blogging About A Sad Flopsweaty Douchebag Clown
Sometimes people ask me why no Foodspin book exists. I have never told them why. The answer is very embarrassing!...
Philippine Senator And Bad Person Manny Pacquiao Wants To Execute Drug Dealers
Manny Pacquiao’s boxing career is ostensibly finished, which means he has more time to spend fulfilling his duties as an elected senator in his home country of the Philippines. This is bad news for Philippine citizens, because it’s never good when a nutjob holds a political office....
Fuck Yeah, Lilly King<em></em>
I’ll never understand how Olympic athletes are able to deal with the pressure. They spend four years training and fighting to qualify for the big show, and then all that work can come down to a few minutes. All it takes is one mistake—a slow start, a slight hitch in technique—for all those years of ...
Lilly King Says All Former Dopers, Including Justin Gatlin, Should Be Banned From The Olympics
American swimmer Lilly King won the gold medal in the 100 meter breaststroke this evening with an Olympic record-time of 1:04:93, beating Russian Yulia Efimova and putting a cap on the most entertaining rivalry of the Rio Olympics. Efimova was implicated in the massive Russian doping scandal that sa...
Olympic Officials Apologize For Using Knock-Off Chinese Flags In Medal Ceremony
After Ginny Thrasher won the first gold medal of the Rio Olympics over Du Li and Yi Siling of China, Olympic officials raised incorrect Chinese flags to the rafter during the medal ceremony. See those flags up there? Notice any differences between them and the real Chinese flag below? ...
Heh. Heh.
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Hell Yeah, We've Got An Olympic Swimmer Beef
Last night was a great one for American swimmers. Michael Phelps put the team on his back and brought the 4 x 100 relay gold back to America, Katie Ledecky continued her run of record-setting performances, and Lilly King showed us that she is a real one....
Idiot On The Field Invades Awful Brazil-Iraq Match
There’s a lot of pressure on the Brazilian men’s soccer team at these Olympics after they crashed out of their own World Cup two years ago in a historic, humiliating 7-1 beatdown from Germany. Brazilian men have never won gold in Olympic soccer, so a first-time tournament win on home soil would rede...
Williams Sisters Lose Olympic Women's Doubles Match For First Time In History
The Williams sisters have been playing as doubles partners at the Olympics since 2000, and had never lost a match together—until today, when they were eliminated in the first round in Rio by the Czech team of Lucie Safarova and Barbora Strycova 6-3, 6-4....
🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸<em></em><em></em><em></em><em></em><em></em><em></em>
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<i>Suicide Squad</i> Is The Summer's Best Movie About Divorce
I consider my life to consist of two parts: one before I saw Suicide Squad, the other after. ...
Padres Chairman Continues To Shit On Players Who Didn't Live Up To His Expectations
There are a lot of big dumb assholes involved in major league baseball. This guy, for example. For whatever reason, Padres executive chairman Ron Fowler, an old man nobody had ever heard of until a few months ago, has decided that 2016 is the year in which he attempts to become the biggest, dumbest ...
DeAngelo Williams' Teammates Pranked Him With A Bunch Of Dang Balloons
I wish someone would prank me like this....