ill Page 611 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How Tebow-To-The-Jaguars Fell Apart, And Why That's A Good Thing
Lots of amateur Darren Rovells got cranky last week when Tim Tebow went to the Jets instead of the Jaguars. They said the Jags had erred in not trumping the Jets' offer to acquire the hometown prince, who would have been good for attendance or jersey sales or something. Hogwash....

Sean Payton Asks Bill Parcells To Coach The Saints For A Year
ESPN reports that Sean Payton has floated the idea that Bill Parcells could be the Saints' placeholder coach while Payton serves his one-year suspension. Parcells is something of a mentor to Payton, so the two have been talking a lot recently, with Payton needing a big Tuna-y shoulder to cry on. But...

Vanilla Ice Will Perform At The Timberwolves Game Friday
This is a special moment for the white people of Minnesota. Vanilla Ice, fresh off his eighth studio album, will perform at halftime of the Wolves/Celtics game this Friday. I don't know his set list, but I'm sure he'll play all your favorite. [NBA.com]...
![Tiger Woods Wins First PGA Tour Event Since 2009 [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Tiger Woods Wins First PGA Tour Event Since 2009 [UPDATE]
Tiger Woods began the day at Bay Hill 11-under par with a one stroke lead over Graeme McDowell. He finished the day five strokes ahead of McDowell and won the Arnold Palmer Invitational with a 13-under par performance....

Roy Williams Used To Coach At Kansas, A Special Place
As we wait for one ex-coach to possibly face off against his old team, we've got one waiting for us in this evening's second game. Roy Williams used to coach for Kansas before returning to his alma mater, North Carolina. In case you weren't sure, here's a little taste....

Rick Pitino: Master Shit-Stirrer
After Louisville came back to beat Florida yesterday, securing a spot in the Final Four, Rick Pitino put on a clinic on how to troll an entire fanbase. With his left hand he builds, and with his right he tears down before you even notice. Asked about a potential showdown with intrastate super-rival...

Your NCAA Tournament Elite Eight, Day One Open Thread
Florida vs. Louisville gets our day started at 4:30 p.m. and then Ohio State vs. Syracuse follows up at 7:05 p.m. Both will be on CBS. Friend vs. Friend, Red vs. Orange, we've got it all! Enjoy the games and lively discussion down below in the comments....

25 Years After Run With Providence, Rick Pitino And Billy Donovan Fight Each Other For Final Four Berth
The built-in storyline for this afternoon's Louisville-Florida game is the connection between the two head coaches. In 1987, Rick Pitino coached a Providence team, lead by point guard Billy Donovan, to the Final Four by exploiting the new rules-change that created the three-point shot. There are sev...

Emile Heskey's Elbow Thoroughly Mangled Johan Djourou's Nose
Today's Arsenal-Aston Villa match from Ashburton Grove got off to a violent start as Gunners defender Johan Djourou took Emile Heskey's elbow straight to the beak—though Djourou was as much responsible for propelling his face into Heskey as much as anything. Despite spending several minutes down o...

Goodbye, Old Friend: The Last Oddibe McDowell Water Bill We'll Ever See Is $80.55
The Broward County department of Waste and Wastewater Services is instituting password protection for viewing and paying customers' utility bills. This could be the last Oddibe McDowell water bill we ever see. It's $80.55, including a semi-annual stormwater fee....

$15,000 Says "Brad Johnson Doesn't Finish This Game": More Tales Of Redskins Bounties
The NFL will tell you repeatedly that it's the cover-up, not the crime. That the harshness of the Saints' punishment is due to the lies and obstruction from the higher-ups, even moreso than the actual bounty program. They'll tell you this because they don't want to have to go around investigating an...

Bill Raftery Thinks Derrick Coleman Is Fat
Former Syracuse great Derrick Coleman is in Boston to root on the Orange in tonight's game against Wisconsin, and is looking a bit girthier than in his NBA playing days. Given the massive amount of debt he's been in, you'd think he might be living a bit leaner. [CBS]...

The End Of The World Will Be Announced By Pat Kiernan
About three minutes into 4:44 Last Day on Earth, an extremely indulgent and stupid movie that opens tomorrow and that you should absolutely not see, NY1 anchor Pat Kiernan stares into the camera and prepares us all to die. If the world is gonna end, if we're all gonna go out together, if that's how ...

Stephon Marbury Refuses To Do Interviews Unless He Gets The Cover Of <i>Sports Illustrated</i>
There are tons of lovable little nuggets in this SI.com piece on Marbury and how the mercurial outcast has somehow become the most beloved foreign player in Chinese basketball history. But our absolute favorite—that he turned down multiple interview requests unless he would be SI's cover boy—is vint...

Haunted By An Abusive Father, Craig James Wet The Bed Until He Was 13
Get ready, fans. This might be the first and only time you feel some sort of sympathy for the politician-human known as Craig James. From Texas Monthly's profile:...

Sean Payton Suspended One Year, Saints Lose Draft Picks In Bounty Punishment
The NFL was promising to swiftly decide the punishment for the Saints' bounty program, and they were not lying—despite the NFLPA's plea to conduct its own investigation first. Today the league ruled, and the penalties are not crippling, but they are significant. As reported near-simultaneously by A...

How A Career Ends: George Gervin Blew By Me, And I Knew That Was It
Tell Me When It's Over is an interview series in which we ask former athletes about the moment they knew their playing days were over. Today: Willie Wise of the 1969 national semifinalist Drake Bulldogs and the 1971 ABA champion Utah Stars....

Tristan Thompson Wanted No Part Of Being On Deron Williams's Poster
Is there anything Deron Williams can't do? (Other than promise with a straight face that he'll be with the Nets next year. Or beat the Cavs last night.)...

NIU Football Player Faces Assault Charges For Bulldozing A Band Member
Northern Illinois linebacker Jamaal Bass (No. 6 in the video, No. 1 in our hearts) was suspended for two games after an incident in November, when he ran over a poor Toledo band member. The trouble's not over: an Ohio grand jury has indicted Bass on one count of felonious assault and one count of ...

The D Train Doesn't Stop Here Anymore: Farewell, Dontrelle Willis, Crazy-Armed Everyman
The pitchers who wow us these days don't remind us of anything familiar. Most of MLB's sharpest aces—Justin Verlander, Jered Weaver, Roy Halladay, Clayton Kershaw, and C.C. Sabathia—were first-round picks, blessed with a freakish ability to throw much harder than their competitors, and groomed for m...