im Page 804 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: See How He Loved Football Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....
Dog Show? More Like The Gun Show
In a first, they'll be testing Iditarod participants (mushers) for drugs and alcohol. This is useless until a dependable test for Purina Beneful is developed. [Fairbanks Daily News-Miner]...
The SEC Title Game, In Microcosm
This video in no way proves that women are better than men at sports. It only proves that Alabama students are better than Florida students at sports. [Via YBB]...
"Famous" Would Have Been Pushing It
Unlikely headline of the day: "Well-Known Badminton Player Dies." [North-West Evening Mail]...
Ivy League Squash Is Serious Business
Harvard's big squash match at Dartmouth was livened up by some rowdy Big Green fans, and now Crimson supporters are crying homophobia and antisemitism. But wait until you read about what must be the most innocuous Jewish stereotype ever....
BCS Chaos Is The Buzzword Of The Weekend
To those of you rooting for the BCS to embarrass itself on a national stage last night, take heart: we are left with the least desirable national championship matchup imaginable....
Robert Johnson Called — He Wants His SEC Championship Back
Alabama 32, Florida 13. [Pic via Rick Ankiel's Moustache]...
"SI" Writer Jon Wertheim Would Like You To Watch Roger Federer's Giggle Fit
Sports Illustrated senior writer Jon Wertheim, author of Strokes of Genius: Federer, Nadal, and the Greatest Match Ever Played, was kind enough to let me bother him. Here, he considers Tiger Woods and challenges Will Leitch to a bet:...
Joakim Noah To LeBron James: "You're A Jerk"
Last night's Cavs-Bulls game was marked by an argument between LeBron James and Joakim Noah, occasioned by King James dancing on the sidelines during Cleveland's 101-87 win. The b-word was apparently thrown, ooh!...
Nets Set The Tone For A Day Of Celebrating The Smallest Victories
Just in time for a tilt with their sorta-not-as-hapless cross-river rivals, the New Jersey Nets snapped their season-opening 18-game losing streak with a 97-91 victory over the Charlotte Bobcats. The expectations for a 64-18 record just went through the roof!...
Comcast Continues To Find Hidden Subtext Of NBA Games
A reader sends us more evidence of a Comcast cable guide curator who is maybe missing the point of a particular NBA game. Unless Rasheed Wallace and Antonio McDyess have a secret love child that I haven't heard about....
Having Eli Manning's Autograph More Humiliating Than Losing To Eli Manning
In the catalog of manufactured outrage, it's hard to think of a dumber example than Dallas players somehow being angry at Eli Manning for signing a wall in the new Cowboys Stadium. Plaster has never been so disrespected!...
Fame And Fortune On The Razor's Edge
Was it fate that brought down the dullest man in sports? Or was it something...sharper? We take a look at the history of Gillette pitchmen, and the woes that befell them soon after. Presenting, the Gillette Curse....
This Explains Those Missed Bunt Signs
More players than ever before have come before MLB with a signed doctor's note, swearing they have ADHD, and by the way, they have to take otherwise-banned stimulants. We're skeptical....
"I" Of The Tiger: A Graphological Inquiry Into The Personality Of Eldrick Woods
Just who is Tiger Woods, exactly? We may never know, but at least we have the science of handwriting analysis to give us an idea. Graphologist Susanne Shapiro looked at Tiger's autograph for us, and she found it very revealing....
Gay Lip-Readers All Over America Are Upset With Jim Harbaugh
I don't know. I think he may have said "Fucking Asshole Fungus." [TowleRoad]...
O.J. Simpson Photographed With His Nordberg Hanging Out
From the brave people who brought you nude Joe Dimaggio comes...nude O.J. Simpson. Note: this photo was taken by Harry Benson and not stolen from Grady Sizemore's girlfriend's computer. [The Daily Beast]...
David Stern's Nightmare Is Now Available For Purchase
Tim Donaghy's book, Personal Foul, is out and can be bought here. The New York Times and the Philadelphia Daily News weigh in. We'll have more on this soon, and I'd wager the NBA will, too. [CreateSpace]...
Jerry Rice Will Just Talk To Any Damn Magazine That Calls Him
The most incredible magazine interview ever granted by Jerry Rice to a dentistry and oral hygiene publication. Here's a sample: "There wasn't a lot of focus on protecting your teeth in high school." /socksknockedthefuckoff! [Dear Doctor]...