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1) Getting hit by a car...

Founder Of The Invictus Games Supports Injured War Veterans Of His Nation's Team
Last week, Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex, spent time talking to the adaptive athletes competing for the UK national team in this year’s Invictus Games. According to the Game’s site, the Duke “saw how the power of sport could help physically, psychologically and socially”....

That Andy Dalton Feeling
It’s a strange and sad fact of how sports works in this moment that the number of people who cared about poor Andy Dalton being benched by the ultra-moribund Cincinnati Bengals and the Washington Nationals winning the World Series in thrilling and satisfying fashion is pretty close. But when we reco...

Highly Desired Talent Squandered In Crucial Moment, Wastes No Time Thinking About Future
The Washington Nationals won the World Series, which feels like an insane thing to write. (Be happy for them at your own discretion.) But let’s talk about Gerrit Cole. The Astros pitcher, one of the best in baseball, was nowhere to be found as Houston lost Game 7, 6-2. Manager A.J. Hinch revealed th...

My Life As A Minor League Baseball Clown
Social media has Hoovered the best years out of my life. The last thing I remember, I was a college freshman whose cosplay enthusiast girlfriend signed us both up for a website called “The Face Book.” Now, I’m middle-aged and drive an electric car. As if this wasn’t already evident, at no point betw...

David Arquette Has Unfinished Business In The Wrestling Ring
On December 8, 2018, David Arquette was standing in front of a table in the 2300 Arena, formerly the ECW Arena. He was wrestling later that night but was at that moment signing autographs and taking pictures. A fan approached the table to tell Arquette that he was his favorite World Championship Wre...

NXT's Jordan Myles Isn't Standing Down Over The Racist Shirt WWE Designed for Him
It is incredibly rare for WWE talent to be vocal about their treatment at the hands of the company, and doubly rare when that mistreatment pertains to issues that are broader and more sensitive than things like booking. This is a big part of what makes the ongoing and very public dust-up between WWE...

For Palestinians In And Out Of Refugee Camps, Al Wihdat Is More Than A Soccer Team
The Jordanian professional soccer team Al Wihdat plays at the heart of a refugee camp, both literally and figuratively, and is both a literal and figurative product and reminder of dispossession. Palestinian refugees and their descendants are the backbone of the club’s fanbase; their jerseys are red...

Candies To Stress Eat While You Watch The World Series Game Tonight, Ranked
This World Series is depressing as hell, just like many other things that are happening right now and which we have no control over. Neither the Houston Astros nor the Washington Nationals (my team) have managed to win a home game. At Game 3, people were literally crying as we left the stadium, whic...

Can I Fuck To My Friend's Band?
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we’re talking about mercy rules, Jason Statham, baseball, cereal, bad roommates, and more....

There Are Only Two Acceptable Wedding Dress Codes
Yesterday, I was having a nice coffee outside with a friend who was telling me about an upcoming trip. He and his girlfriend were going to a wedding in Austin. I, a famous lover a good wedding, wanted details. There’s a moment when you ask people who wear dresses about weddings that never comes up w...

Check Out The Wheels On This Pumpkin Thief
Yesterday, D.C. writer Topher Mathews posted about the pumpkin on his doorstep. Specifically, he posted about how someone had stolen his pumpkin. It happens all the time! However, I have to say that I am pretty sure most pumpkin thefts are not this funny....

Freddie Kitchens Made An Absolute Brain-Genius Move With The Browns Down Three Possessions
You know how every so often, we’ll get a story about Bill Belichick exploiting some obscure loophole in order to give the Patriots a better opportunity in a certain scenario? What Browns head coach Freddie Kitchens did in Sunday’s 27-13 loss to New England is the opposite of that....

Nationals Fans Didn’t Stick To Sports
Well, that went well, didn’t it? Donald Trump went to a baseball game, he got booed, the home team got hammered again, and the ratings are still, well, the ratings. ...

I'm Not Saying The Broncos Put A Hit Out On Joe Flacco, But...
This is all pretty suspicious, no? After last week’s Denver Broncos loss, wide receiver Emmanuel Sanders said, among other criticisms, “We need to call better plays.” He then quickly disappeared off the team in a trade with San Francisco. Now, after the Broncos lost again on Sunday in a heartbreaker...

Ja Morant Scores 30, Stuffs Kyrie Irving, Will Be A Lot Of Fun On The Grizzlies
Big fat dunks, pinpoint dimes, and the gumption to go at Kyrie Irving in a scoring duel and win? Ja Morant delivered on all those fronts Sunday as the Memphis Grizzlies took out the Brooklyn Nets, 134-133. Based on Morant’s 30-point, nine-assist romp, the No. 2 pick out of Murray State intends to re...

Cowboy Mounted Shooting Is A Sport With Its Own Ideas About The Old West
SOCORRO, New Mexico — Ten traffic cones dotted a large dirt pitch, each threaded with a helium balloon: five yellow, five pink. The balloons were the kind you’d find at any dollar store or birthday party, perfectly innocuous. At the far end of the arena, a mounted rider paced a small track in the ea...

Sergiño Dest Announces He Will Play For USMNT
The USMNT is currently looking like wet slop, Gregg Berhalter seems like a bad coach, and, until last weekend, Christian Pulisic was not earning as much playing time as he wanted over at Chelsea. It has been a bad month all told, especially with the future of the program’s best dual national suddenl...

Matt Nagy Kind Of Did It To Himself This Time
Matt Nagy spent most of the offseason openly tormenting himself and his team about the double-doink kick that knocked the Bears out of last year’s playoffs. The stakes behind Sunday’s game-losing miss weren’t nearly as high—nobody is going to remember the Bears losing a game 17–16 in October, becaus...

The Falcons Are Toast And Dan Quinn Is Getting Crispy On Both Sides
The Falcons are a bad football team. As such, head coach Dan Quinn is expected to not be the head coach for very much longer. But when will Quinn be fired? Now, with a depressing 1-7 record and entering the bye? After the near-inevitable loss to the rival Saints in two weeks? Painlessly and in his s...