in Page 2027 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Broken Tiger Woods To Miss Masters
Tiger Woods announced in December he was returning to golf, but his broken, fucked-up body won’t allow it—as Woods announced on his website today that he’ll miss the Masters for the third time in four years....

Deadspin Up All Night: Like Kurt Cobain Was Here
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Now go outside!...

Judge Tells All "Potential Witnesses" In Larry Nassar Case To Shut Up
One day after several women testified before Congress about how disgraced former gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar sexually abused them, the judge overseeing one of the related criminal cases issued an order restricting what can be said. On Wednesday, Ingham County Circuit Court Judge Rosemarie Aquilin...

Diminutive Tennis Player's Entertaining Hot Streak Ends With ACL Tear<em></em>
If you were to flesh out the cohort of the next generation of tennis, the first few picks would be easy: Nick Kyrgios and Alexander Zverev are the sure shots; Dominic Thiem and Lucas Pouille are a little older but have got to be in the mix; and from the U.S. there’s Jack Sock and hopefully Frances ...

Canadian Skaters Thrive As Others Struggle At Figure Skating World Championships
Life in Canada is good. Not only do our neighbors to the north have access to runaway plows and ample supplies of maple syrup, but at this year’s world figure skating championships, their two female skaters claimed spots on the medal podium, placing second and third behind predicted winner Evgenia M...


My Offer For The Stonyfield Yogurt Company
TO: The Board of Directors of the Stonyfield Yogurt Company. ...

International Duty Wiped Out Everton And Ronald Koeman Is Pissed Again
The FIFA virus has hit Everton hard, wreaking havoc on their expected lineup ahead of this weekend’s big rivalry game against Liverpool. If there’s one man who can’t stand this particular illness, and who has no compunction making his frustration perfectly clear to those he considers at fault, it’s ...

Coastal Carolina Suspended Their Entire Cheerleading Squad And Won't Say Why
Last night, Coastal Carolina’s athletic department announced that the school’s cheerleading team had been indefinitely suspended pending a conduct investigation. Myrtle Beach news station WMBF noticed that the cheerleading team had been scrubbed from the CCU athletics website, with their section now...


José Quintana Still On White Sox
Ace pitcher José Quintana, still a member of the Chicago White Sox, is scheduled to pitch Monday’s home opener against the Detroit Tigers. ...

Endurance Cycling Legend Mike Hall Killed By Car Driver At Age 35<em></em>
This morning, Mike Hall was setting out for the last leg of the Indian Pacific Wheel Race, an unsupported race across Australia, when he was struck and killed by a car outside Canberra. Police say he died at the scene, and organizers called off the race shortly after. He was 35 years old....

Do You Really Want To Know Anything About The Marlins?
Last year was a fun one for the Miami Marlins, until it really, really wasn’t. José Fernández’s death may not actually cast a pall over the Marlins’ entire 2017 season, but it certainly feels that way now. It will definitely feel that way whenever I have to watch Dan Straily pitch....

Business Associate Of Prominent Anti-Chief Wahoo Activist Charged With Embezzlement
An Ohio man who served as a grant writer for the American Indian Education Center in Parma, Ohio, was charged yesterday with embezzling more than $183,000 from federal grants provided for Native American services by the federal Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration....

Stars Player Hospitalized After High Stick To The Face
Dallas Stars forward Curtis McKenzie left a trail of blood on the ice after the Bruins’ Kevan Miller high-sticked him in the third period of Thursday’s 2-0 Boston win....

Nobody Trusts The Process More Than America's Most Prominent Young Socialists<em></em>
In April of last year, Philadelphia right-wing talk radio host and Daily News columnist Dom Giordano cooked up a hot take comparing now former Philadelphia 76ers general manager Sam Hinkie to Bernie Sanders. It ended with an almost Breitbartian non sequitur: “Hinkie robbed area basketball fans of th...

Adrian Peterson Is In Exile
Two weeks ago, when the Minnesota Vikings signed free agent back Latavius Murray, general manager and honorary third Bayless brother Rick Spielman said publicly that the signing meant that Adrian Peterson will not be back with the team next season. Since then, Peterson has languished in free agency,...

The Perfectly Stupid Scandal Of The NCAA's First Real One-And-Done<em></em><em></em>
Nearly 30 years ago, on the day before he was to play for a national championship, Andrew Gaze was on the defensive....

The Best Thing About This Year's WrestleMania Is A Brutally Personal Reality-TV Feud
This Sunday’s WrestleMania is not your father’s, which is both the sort of thing World Wrestling Entertainment would say to promote it and true—if not quite in the way they would like you to think....

The World's Best Figure Skater Is About To Win Gold Skating To Audio From Sept. 11
When 2016 world champion Evgenia Medvedeva skates close to the boards to begin her footwork sequence across the ice in Helsinki, the music will cut away and you’ll hear something you might remember if you were alive and sentient on Sept. 11, 2001: The voice of George W. Bush announcing that two plan...