in Page 3405 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is Why You Don't Ask A Professional Athlete To Be A School "Reading Champion"
I absolutely cannot think of a better inspiration for getting schoolchildren to read than by choosing a man who got very rich without ever having read a book in his life....
Cockblocked By Rugby!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Low-Budget Pitbull Imitator Produces Nauseating "Do The Mark Sanchez" Video
There aren't too many lyrics here, other than "do the Mark Sanchez," and "heart of a champion," so it's hard to dispute their words with statistical evidence. (Of note: the call-and-response here is "Who's number one?" "We number one!" But "we" could really be the Jets or the performers.) Mark San...
Floyd Mayweather Isn't Ducking Manny Pacquaio; He's Being Persecuted, Or Something
Floyd Mayweather Jr. didn't take too kindly to Sirius radio host Rude Jude's accusation that he's afraid to fight Manny Pacquiao. So Mayweather decided to call Jude's show yesterday, at the urging of 50 Cent, and you can listen to the audio above. Mayweather never directly addresses the issue at h...
Persian Awakening In Perry Hall: Uptight Mullahs Forced To Reverse Decision On Soccer Team's Bernie Dance
Yesterday, we brought you news that the Grand Ayatollah of Perry High School in Maryland had cancelled the boys varsity soccer season after players did the Bernie on the field. The dance was deemed "unacceptable" by the Grand Ayatollah, who also goes by the name Principal George Roberts....
America Likes LSU Tomorrow; Vegas Doesn't
Alabama is at -4.5 offshore and in most of Vegas, and that hasn't come down much despite the vast majority of bettors backing LSU—75 percent by one estimate. But it's all "$20 and $50 bets." The big money has withheld judgment so far....
Even Criminal Lobbyist Jack Abramoff Lectured Dan Snyder About The Redskins Name, Likening It To "The New York Jew Boys"
Scumbag lobbyist and George Bush leg-humper Jack Abramoff has a self-serving book out called Capital Punishment: The Hard Truth About Washington Corruption From America's Most Notorious Lobbyist. In the book, which you should not buy, Abramoff details his relationship with Dan Snyder, whom Abramoff ...
Jurgen Klinsmann Needs 90 Words To Say Nothing
With friendlies against France and Slovenia looming, the U.S. men's soccer team will start getting blooded against stronger competition. Jurgen Klinsmann continues to tinker with lineups and test out new players, so we can't fault him too much for the 1-1-3 record he's compiled to date. But don't th...
The Official Who Breaks Up A Hockey Fight Will Sometimes Get Punched In the Face. Twice.
Your morning roundup for Nov. 4, the day we finally had it up to here with hugging. Video of hockey fight via Cosby Sweaters; H/T to Alicia. For an excellent GIF of Cal Clutterbuck's punch, be sure to check out West Coast Digress. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Alex Trebek Suggests Jeopardy Contestant Is Kinky After She Provides This Sexy Wrong Response
Kara Spak is a reporter for Chicago's Sun-Times, but she turned a September Jeopardy! appearance into a side career when she won five straight games and pocketed $85,401. The feat earned her an appearance on tonight's episode of the always-popular "Tournament of Champions," and this answer in the ...
This Evening: Aaron Rodgers Was Rambo For Halloween
Your p.m. roundup for Nov. 3, the day we learned salt makes everything better. Photo courtesy Busted Coverage, via @NanciFilipelli. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Albert Pujols Spotted At The Airport In St. Louis. But Where Could He Be Going?
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!!...
The Facial Expression On The World's Fastest Jump Roper Is Gold
[via The Score]...
The Mets Are Moving The Fences To Distract Themselves From The Fact They're The Mets
Not so long ago (2009), the New York Mets opened a new stadium in Flushing. It was supposed to be a classy, exposed-brick-and-green-steel tribute to the franchise's ascendance. Instead, Citi Field has been a monument to the Mets' modern futility and clumsiness....
ESPN's College GameDay Is Starting Early In Tuscaloosa—And So Are The Students
College GameDay has made the rare trip to the location of a non-ESPN television game, though it would be ridiculous for them to be anywhere but Tuscaloosa for Saturday night's match between #1 LSU and #2 Alabama (on CBS). The game's drawn such national attention that the GameDay crew made the trip ...
Uptight Mullahs Punish Soccer Team For Gyrations They Deem Indecent
No, not the Iranians. The Patch site for Perry Hall, Maryland, reports that the principal of Perry Hall High School shut down the boys' soccer team after the players celebrated a playoff victory by doing the Bernie on the field. Principal George Roberts declared that because of the dance exhibition,...
Trent Richardson Doesn't Know How Much He Can Bench, Because Trainers Won't Let Him Try More Than 475
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Trent Smash!...
The Iranian Soccer Players Who "Groped" Each Other After Goals Could Face Public Lashings On The Pitch
On Saturday, Persepolis F.C., a soccer club based in Tehran, scored a goal against Damash Gilan. After the goal, the players gathered to celebrate, as players will do. One of the players, Mohammad Nosrati, sorta stuck his hand in the ass-balls region of one of his teammates, Sheys Rezaei, as playe...
Aww! Ooohhh. Yay?
Gotta protect the football. [via Barstool]...
Candy Thief Gets Absolutely Trucked While Running From Cops
Via local news connoisseur Jimmy Traina comes this breaking post-Halloween news out of Phoenix. A group of young men had been stealing candy from grocery stores to the tune of hundreds of dollars, until police pulled them over. One man ran, hiding on the rooftops. Then: pepper spray, a slippery ca...