in Page 3489 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Everything Right With Soccer, In Three Minutes Of Incredible Non-Dives
Technically, Barcelona and Argentina forward Lionel Messi dove a few times, in a literal sense, as he was hip-checked, tripped up and otherwise impeded by lesser talents. Problem is, Messi missed several opportunities to flail about to pad his stat sheet. He is the Best Soccer Player On Earth....

Kato Kaelin Sold O.J. Out On "The View" Today
For some reason or another, the Barbara Walters damegaggle decided to put O.J. Simpson's old house guest, Kato Kaelin, on television this morning. Seems as if they presumed people wanted to know where he is now. And hot damn, he's rocking. Says his life has been "crazy great" since the Packers won...

Rex Ryan Has Guaranteed A Super Bowl Win Twice Since The Last Super Bowl, 18 Days Ago
The 2010 NFL season ended a full 18 days ago, and it's already day one of the NFL Combine, and so it's kind of a wonder that Rex Ryan has made mere two public predictions that the New York Jets will win Super Bowl XLVI in Indianapolis. He actually "guarantees" that it will happen. But really, he "...

What Some Heavyweight Boxing Champions Do In Prison
From our random trivia department: Jack Johnson, the first black heavyweight champion of the world, wasn't merely a master of the sweet science. He also knew a thing or two about the physical sciences....

It's Time For The NFL Combine, An Event Made Just For You
Beginning today in Indianapolis, hundreds of the finest young men our football factories have produced will be sprinting their 40s, weaving their cones, benching their presses, doodling their Wonderlics. Hundreds of media members, more reporters than prospects, will also descend on Indianapolis, and...

Kid Wrestler Has Mohawk, Strut, Skills
We've received two videos with "Ooh Aah" as soundtrack this week: one was this highlight compilation of Schuylerville, N.Y. kid wrestler Stevo Poulin, and one was bros in polo shirts shotgunning beers on a golf course. I'll be the first to say it: young Stevo, the first-place finisher in his class...

What ESPN Won't Let Player X Say: Prenups, Popping Asses, And Watching Your Wife Get Pounded
ESPN The Magazine runs a regular feature called Player X, in which a current athlete writes anonymously on a pressing issue affecting his sport. A couple of issues ago, the mystery NBA player tackled the topic of infidelity among pro athletes. What ran in the magazine was polished, snappy...and unen...

Verizon Wireless Store Employees Are The Devil’s Afterbirth
Yesterday I had to go to a Verizon Wireless store to get the numbers from my old phone transferred over to a phone I had just purchased. (Not an iPhone. Fuck you for owning one, Mr. I Can Afford A Data Plan.) And after 15 minutes in that fucking store, I can now say, without hyperbole, that Verizon ...

Baron Davis Traded To Cleveland, Some 2,300 Miles Away From Donald Sterling's Taunts
Clippers guard Baron Davis, who has averaged 12.8 points and 7 assists this season — with some credit due to Blake Griffin's ability to finish close to the basket — is headed to Cleveland, along with a first-round draft pick. The Cavs are sending Mo Williams and Jamario Moon. Davis, who is nursing a...

We Are All Dave McKenna XXI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit vanishes like manners at a pig trough. Our installment today comes from the Washington City Paper itself, whose publisher, Amy Austin, ran a letter...

Everything Wrong With Soccer, In One Incredible Dive
Technically, Chilean U20 defender Bryan Carrasco didn't dive, as he was definitely struck by the Ecuadorian player. Problem is, Carrasco literally smacked himself in the face with the other player's arm. He received a free kick....

Tiger Woods, Gone Fishin'
We were recently sent these photos of Tiger Woods in happier times. (These days, "happier times" just means "not golfing.") Just men being men, with no dames in sight, fly fishing with Mark O'Meara....

Wisconsin Beats Michigan With A Banked-In Three-Pointer At The Buzzer
Wisconsin's Josh Gasser beat Michigan with this shot last night, and probably ended their chances at an at-large bid to the dance, too. The look on the Wolverines' faces after the shot says it all: there really is no more demoralizing ending to a basketball game, if you're not on the side that chu...

They Called The Cops On UTEP Coach Tim Floyd Last Night
Your morning roundup for Feb. 24, the day Edward James Olmos turns 63....

The Naked Sledding Contest Was Just Held In Germany (NSFW)
According to the organizers of the "Naked Sledging Contest" in Braunlage, Germany, more than 400 people wanted to compete, but only 26 were permitted to do so. Competitors stripped near-nude and vied for a £1,000 prize by traveling a "90 metre long iced snowy piste." Decent coin, but earning the ti...

Gay Poles Want Separate Seating At Euro 2012 Games
Rainbow Stand 2012 (aka Teczowa Trybuna 2012) bills itself as the Polish national soccer team's first gay fan club. And who knows, maybe they are. Per the Warsaw Business Journal, members have asked UEFA for separate seating during the Euro 2012 tournament which will be played in Poland and the Ukr...

Wayne Gretzky Officially Has Better Hair Than Justin Bieber
The only part of this clip from today's episode of "The Talk" that's really worth watching is at the very beginning. The host asks for "somebody to help me out," as in, to make some noise, and a girl in the front row stands and holds her arm up in desperation; she's thinking she'll get to say some...

What We Talk About When We Talk About The Carmelo Anthony Trade
As the clamor surrounding the Carmelo Anthony and Deron Williams trades mercifully subsides, it would be easy to lend credence, as some basketball observers have done, to a silly and shopworn conclusion: that the inmates are running the asylum. Last week, Dick Vitale used almost those exact words to...

Carmelo Anthony Decided That New York Was The Place To "Bring My Talent"
In the Knicks' live press conference this afternoon, it took approximately two questions for Carmelo Anthony to explain that he had sat down with his family and made a "decision" (or a Decision?) to "bring [his] talent" to New York. He shall be known as LeCarmelo....

Tony La Russa Is Going To Overmanage Right At Jonny Gomes's Head
The Reds' Jonny Gomes reacts to Adam Wainwright's "significant" elbow injury: "The melody was not recognizable, but the words were plaintive: 'Wainwright's gone, Wainwright's gone, Wainwright's gone,' he sang joyously." [Dayton Daily News]...