in Page 3575 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Lessons In Midget Hoisting Etiquette
My power went out this morning for the 9,000th time this summer. Let me tell you something: power outages are a hundred times worse when you have small children. No power means the TV doesn't work, so I have nothing to turn on to get the kids to be quiet so that I can ignore them properly. Also, the...

Last Night's Winner: Jim Gray, Sports Zelig
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Jim Gray, ubiquitous microphone toady, unlikely power broker, and apparently also something of a dick....

$5 Yard Sale Find Turns Out To Be Floyd Landis Custom Bike
Once prized, the bike was discarded on the side of the road, and thought to be worthless. Much like Landis himself....

200 Beer Bottles Opened In 80 Seconds? Believe It
In the pantheon of useless talents, this rates somewhere between reciting Pi to the hundredth digit and throwing a knuckleball. I'd be more impressed if he had kept even one beer from overflowing with head....

Tim Tebow's Hyperbaric Chamber Lets Him Use Oxygen Better Than You, Too
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Isiah Thomas Has Decided To Take His Talents Away From The Knicks
He says in a statement: "After speaking with Commissioner Stern and Knicks executives, it has become apparent that my new agreement violates certain NBA bylaws. Because of this, I have decided to rescind my contract with the team." [NYT]...

Deaf Guy Getting Choked By Mall Security? Deaf Guy Getting Choked By Mall Security (UPDATE: Video Fixed)
This video shows some overzealous security person at a Los Angeles mall showing off his MMA classes on a possible shoplifter. Problem is, the purple-faced shoplifter is deaf, didn't hear the alarm, and...also may have paid for his items. [SmartCrew]...

Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Austin Croshere
Welcome back to Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater. Today's laughably out-of-place subject? Bill Walton absolutely loved saying his name: Austin Croshere. The song: "Bad Lands," by rappers Zion I & The Grouch....

Playboy Playmate Is Pretty Sure A Lot Worse Has Happened In UCF Locker Room
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: subject of minor controversy, Miss July, Shanna Marie McLaughlin....

Furry Tries To Legally Change His Name To "Boomer The Dog"
Gary Guy Mathews. A perfectly good name. But Mr. Mathews wants to officially be known as Boomer the Dog, to go along with his homemade fursuit....

Robinho Misses Out On Barca Move By Being Troublesome
Like an early 1990s Mickey Rourke, Robinho is increasingly looking like a man with buckets of talent who no one particularly wants to work with....

Look At These Fucking Hoopsters At Lollapalooza: Part Two
Welcome to the second edition of the Hoopsters of Lollapalooza 2010. There's been some debate over whether of not some of the entrants are real "hipsters" or merely "bros." Why though? This is a forum for ridicule, not ontological precision. Onto the pictures! Part One | Part Two | Part Three...

You, Dim, Spammy Crap Peddler, Are Dumb And Should Be Fired
One of the many downsides of being an internet "editor" is the heaping pile of sales pitches you receive from various fly-by-night tech companies trying to "partner-up" with you on some useless mobile device or traffic-booster. Here is one of these people....

Crotch-Kicking Senate Nominee Linda McMahon Assailed From Right And Left As Crotch-Kicker
First came Connecticut GOP rival Peter Schiff's incredible campaign ad. Now comes this DNC statement about the former WWE CEO: "Today the party of Bob Dole, Jack Kemp and Dick Lugar nominated a candidate who kicks men in the crotch..."...

The Reds-Cardinals "Brawl" Derided For Your Pleasure
For a second, last night's Cardinals-Reds "brawl" was pretty exciting, but only in the sense of "Oh, this'll be good." And then it wasn't good. For this reason, it deserves to be mocked. With video! Three times!...

Why Is There A Nationals Cap In The Original <em>Karate Kid</em>?
The movie came out in 1984, 20 years before the not-yet-extant Nationals unveiled their "curly W" logo. Time traveler? Or something more benign? Probably time traveler....

Great Moments In Brick Wall Anthemry: “In The Fade”
All during Music Week at Deadspin, I'll be writing about great asskicking songs of yore. Today, it's "In The Fade" by Queens Of The Stone Age....

Ten-Year Ban For Whipping Out His Junk
One of New Zealand's premier lawn bowlers is facing a decade-long ban from the sport after he "flopped out my old fella" to tell his teammates they were "playing like dicks." New Zealand's a strange, strange place....

Last Night's Winner: Stephen Strasburg Expectations
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like our hopes and dreams for one talented rookie, which are a little more realistic this morning after he got shelled to high heaven....

Chris Mortensen Is Not Well-Liked, According To Sources Close To Adam Schefter
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....