in Page 3593 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Great Moments In Wounded Rabbit Mercy Killing
Let's get right to your letters. We're in for a cocksuckin' good time today, cocksuckers....
DONE FUCKING DEAL! LEBRON TO HEAT, SAYS...SOUTH BEACH PARTY PLANNERS
"LeBron James has rented six cabanas at the W Hotel South Beach this weekend to celebrate his team decision, two sources confirm." [US Magazine, image via Clevescene.com]...
Story On Dean Smith's Failing Health May Give You Some Dust In Your Eye
"People close to the coach say his famous memory is slipping. On some days he doesn't recognize people he has known for years." [Fayetteville Observer]...
Forget About LeBronukkah With This Mindblowing Stop-Motion History Of Evolution
Here's a video by street artist Blu, who paints our evolutionary history on various surfaces and records it all with some fine stop-motion animatin'. It features a prokaryote doing a one-hour special called "The Decision." [CultureLab]...
LeBron Watch, Day 49: The Day We All Became Witnesses
At 9 p.m., the long-running soap opera over LeBron James's free agency will end, cementing the fact that the King's ego — not the things he does on the court — has become his defining characteristic....
Last Night's Winner: Ugly, Ugly Wayne Rooney
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Wayne Rooney, who finally made it onto the scoresheet. Too bad it's tops in a "world's ugliest soccer player" poll....
Old Photos From Hulk Hogan's Son's Birthday Party Surface, Depicting Mock Combat, Power Maneuvers, Jorts
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
LeBron James Is A Cocksucker
Tomorrow is the day LeBron James becomes the most unlikable person in the NBA, and perhaps all of American sports. I used to think he was okay a year ago. No more. He's the villain now....
Colin Cowherd Mentions The Gloria James-Delonte West Humping Rumor; ESPN Not Pleased
On his show, useless ESPN talker Colin Cowherd has dared mention the Great Unmentionable Thing: the Delonte West-Gloria James rumor that was all the rage a few weeks ago. Oh, and he has "sources."...
Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For July 7
The final game—and shameful, shameful third-place game—is set. But before we get to the prognosticating, let's look at today's, um, goal, scored to music in a culturally benighted manner. Tune: Kid Frost....
Young Fan's Interference Leads To Mariners Loss, Priceless Expressions Of Wounded Innocence
In the eighth inning last night, Russell Branyan hit a chopper down the line that rolled into foul territory and was picked up by a teenager—preventing Ichiro from tying the game. Watch the young man's excitement turn to horror. [MLB.com]...
KABOOM: LEBRON TO CHICAGO, SAYS...SOME GUY MONITORING SUMMIT COUNTY TAXATION OR SOMETHING
"FLASH: Summit Co. processed request TODAY to change address on tax bill for BJ'S home from an LLC in Cleveland to a new address in Chicago" [EricMansfield]...
TAKE IT TO THE BANK: LEBRON STILL GOING TO KNICKS AND STEPHEN A. IS MISINFORMED, SAYS...SAME GUY FROM BEFORE
"in 28 hours we will find out who's right Stephen or NYCRAY. Is the KNICKS and no other team. Hook, Line, Sinker....... DONE" [@nyc_ray, photo via DeviantART]...
БЛЯТЬ! LEBRON TO KNICKS, SAYS...CAPITALISM
"There's been twice as many contracts sold to people betting that MSG stock will rise to $22.50 by the end of the month as compared to people betting it will fall to $20 by July's end." [CNBC, painting by our own OchentaYcinco]...
HEAVENS TO BETSY: LEBRON TO MATTOON, SAYS...STONED LOCAL
"@DEADSPIN Librarian sez WE'RE GONNA NEED SOME MORE ROLLOUT BLEACHERS!" [@williamfleitch]...
CHERRY-TOP THAT BITCH: LEBRON GOING TO NEW YORK SAYS...YET ANOTHER GUY
"@Deadspin only NEW YORK that's it" [NYCRay, image via deviantART]...
HOLD THE MAYO: LEBRON TO BULLS SAYS...SOME OTHER GUY
"Sources: BREAKING NEWS!!! LeBron James told the Chicago Bulls that he is going to sign with them. Will break the news tomorrow night at 9pm!" [@DAYV0N, painting via Fine Art America]...
MARK IT DOWN: LEBRON GOING TO NEW YORK/NEW JERSEY METROPOLITAN REGION SAYS...CHAD OCHOCINCO
"*Empire State of Mind* *wink* *wink*only the smart folk will put this together and figure out what i am talking about #6" [OchoCincoNewsNetwork, image via deviantART]...
BOOK IT: LEBRON GOING TO KNICKS, SAYS...SOME GUY
From Tips: A friend at ESPN (Bristol) just texted me that Lebron is going to the Knicks. It came across the wire. Another friend at ESPN just confirmed it....This changes everything…...
ABSOLUTELY ROCK SOLID: LEBRON GOING TO KNICKS SAYS...JARED DUDLEY
"Breaking News!!! My sources tell me Lebron will announce that he will be goin to the NY KNICKS tomorrow on ESPN.. This is serious.. WOW!!!!" [JaredDudleyTwitter, photo via Esquire]...