in Page 3604 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
FedEx: When You Absolutely, Positively Need Your Son's Team To Play In A BCS Conference
Memphis, stricken by Realignment Fever, is trying to negotiate their way into a bigger conference or, failing that, find a wealthy benefactor to buy them one. Thankfully, they (and their quarterback) have an international conglomerate at their disposal....
Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 14
Lots of exciting goals today — Japan's Keisuke Honda scoring off of a nice cross and Italy's Daniele De Rossi off a corner kick especially — but let's look at all of them in a culturally insensitive manner....
Cell Phone-Bosomed Paraguay Girl Is The Star Of The World Cup So Far
You can be happy, the rest of your life, with a Paraguay Girl. Even the Italians, who had to settle for a troubling tie from the scrappy republic known primarily for its political unrest and its chief export, mandals....
Intern Horrors: "You'll Never Work In This Business Again," The Scooter-Riding Mascot Said
Welcome to Intern Horrors, the weekly feature filled with tales of being at the bottom of the totem pole, looking way up or cursing the indentured servants that save you money. Today: mascots behaving badly, office chair shenanigans and more. Sic alert!...
Tim Donaghy On Game 5: Why Make-Up Calls Are Necessary
Tim Donaghy, the former NBA referee who spent 11 months in prison for relaying inside information to gamblers, is reviewing the performance of his former colleagues during the NBA Finals. Here's a quarter-by-quarter breakdown of Game 5, with video....
Abby Sunderland's Controversial Voyage Was For A Reality TV Show
Heard enough about Abby Sunderland, the 16-year-old whose record attempt got a whole bunch of panties in a twist this past week? Too bad. Her family inked a deal for a doc and a reality show before she shoved off....
Tonya Harding Sex Fantasy Page Still Surprisingly Active
Here's an unwelcome departure from refuckingallignment and World Cup news: Tonya Harding, disgraced former figure skater, still has fans. Horny fans, actually, who not-so-eloquently fantasize about "karate fucking" her and other disturbing coital activities....
Chris Cooley, Chugging Condiments
Our old friend Chris Cooley is back. No, he's not showing us his penis this time. But after seeing this video, we almost wish he had....
The One Where The Mets Get Started Early For USA-England
Continental Harbor Hotel, Baltimore, Md.: Saturday before the USA v England game in Baltimore. We tried to get them to come to Hooters with us to watch the game but they had to go to bp I assume — Darcy D....
Your Culturally Insensitive Weekend World Cup Goal Roundup (Video)
Last time around, we didn't have that many goals and thus only a few chances to express woeful ignorance about other countries' cultures. This time? Eleven goals over six games. So let's get stupid....
Vince Young's Texas Pride Wins The Weekend
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLAh16kAvPA In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Vince Young standing up for his alma mater, punching out a dude just because he was from Oklahoma....
England Now Just One Enormous Cock-Up
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Lakers-Celtics Continue NBA Finals Quest To Hang Another Colorful Bed Sheet From Their Rafters
The other major sporting event free of the incessant buzz of the vuvuzela in The Garden. Prepare for action shots of Maria Menounos attempting to trip Lamar Odom. [Image courtesy the brilliant Mocksession.com]...
A Reader Gives Us The Origin Of The World Cup "Sex Machines" Sign
Reader Josh H. has been deputized to the I-team: It's a song by Ghana rap group "Ruff N Smooth" called "Sex Machine." The the people of Ghana do love their humping....
Vince Young Lead Suspect In Dallas Strip Club Assault
"Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young is the prime suspect in a Saturday night assault at a Dallas strip club that left an individual with bodily injury, an official with the Dallas Police Department said Sunday." [CBS Dallas via SecondStringFullback]...
Abby Sunderland Sails Into A Media Shitstorm
Sixteen-year-old sailor Abby Sunderland may not have circumnavigated the globe, but headlines of her ordeal certainly did. She's only the latest teenager to push herself to the limit while barely pushing puberty. And now her whole endeavor is being judged harshly by the self-appointed surrogate pare...
Last Night's Winner: Robert Green
In sports, everyone's a winner, some just win better than others. Like Robert Green, who is pretty much a loser in every country afraid of the letter "z". But over here, he'd get a one-man parade down the Canyon of Heroes....
Beware Ghana's Sex Machines
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
ESPN Gives Clint Dempsey Unfortunate Nickname
So that was fun, huh? The U.S. played to a draw today thanks in large part to Robert Green's colossal cock-up. Green is expected to be Temple of Doom'd by Capello later this evening. Next up: Slovenia, lower TV ratings....
Annoying Use Of The Vuvuzela Throughout History: A Video Retrospective
By now you should be familiar with the vuvuzela, whose buzzing has become the unofficial anthem of the World Cup. Here's a compilation of great moments in history, film, and the internet that may or may not have been improved by vuvuzelas....