in Page 3686 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Colorado May Consider Bake Sale In Order To Buy Out Coach
Colorado's football team stinks and no one really cares for head coach Dan Hawkins, but the usual solution—throwing money at the problem—just isn't going to work this time. They don't have any money left to throw....

Decade Retrospective: 2000
We commence the year-by-year look back at the decade with the year 2000, back when there were rocket packs, back when we all thought O.J. Simpson was just the smiling guy from the Hertz commercials. Simple times....

The Case Against Michael David Barrett, Cont'd
This replaces the criminal complaint lodged against the alleged peephole-customizer last month. The feds additionally accuse Barrett of filming Erin Andrews at a hotel in Columbus, Ohio, adding yet another state to his hornball tour of the country....

Yet Another Reason Not To See <em>The Blind Side</em>
Michael Lewis, author of the book that is currently being butchered at a theater near you, reports that presidential-blowjob sleuth Ken Starr was so moved at a screening of the movie that he cried. [NYMag.com]...

Your Daily Mark Mangino Harassment Update
Former Kansas football players are coming out of the woodwork now to tell the us all how awfully "inappropriate" Mark Mangino is when he yells at his players. It's clear that when it comes to emotional devastation, he's the king....

Sports Cards Can Still Make You Rich, Pathetic
Two private card collectors swapped a pristine Michael Jordan rookie card and a $200,000 check, but wait until you hear what exciting plans the new owner of the card has in store. Absolutely nothing!...

Last Night's Winner: France Haters
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like France, who finally regained their rightful place as Europe's most reviled country. We really missed dumping on those cheese eaters....

OSU Students Wallow In Their Own Urine
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Old Logic: France Surrenders. New Logic: France Cheats
Ireland's World Cup dreams die, and France's live on, thanks to a goal that saw two strikers clearly offside, and a pair of blatant Thierry Henry handball assists to boot. The Irish, as you might expect, aren't taking this well....

Wrestling Still Real On One Misguided Continent
It's laughable that some American newspapers put pro wrestling in the sports section, but it could be worse. It could be in the news section, as it is for one Aussie paper that doesn't seem to understand it's fake....

Whitlock: Mangino's Oozing Pumpkin The Root Of All His Coaching Woes
Jason Whitlock offers his funky-fresh perspective on the absurd Mark Mangino poking situation by positing that the beleaguered coach's problems could have all been avoided had he not weighed "450 to 500 pounds." Fat-on-fat crime ensues....

Erin Andrews' Accused Peeper Formally Charged, Feels Really Bad
Michael David Barrett has been charged with one count of interstate stalking. His lawyer responds: "Mr. Barrett would like to express his deep regret for the circumstances that have caused the issuance of the charges against him today." [TMZ]...

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Body-Painted Mary Magdalene Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

Come On Down To Crazy Joe's Big Red Machines!
Always one to stay ahead of the curve, Joe Morgan has decided that now is the time to get into the booming business of auto sales. At Joe Morgan Honda, your starter's Won-Loss Percentage is your credit! [Cincinnati.com]...

Mark Mangino Has A Bit Of A Temper
Does this look like the face of someone who would berate and threaten his players? Or worse, a parking enforcer who was only doing his job when he gave the Kansas football coach two dozen parking tickets? You'd be surprised....

Last Night's Winner: Josh Pastner
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Memphis coach Josh Pastner, who didn't even win! Don't think that won't stop him from becoming college basketball's new golden boy....

Hey Dude In The Back...What Number Is Kansas Ranked?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

The Charlie Weis Death Watch Flies Under The Radar
Notre Dame is so desperate to pretend they haven't decided to fire Weis, they've blocked their private plane (also known as the SchmoozeJet) from being tracked on the Internet. Though odds are 2:1 it's been to Palo Alto....

Beat That, Dr. James Andrews
Arsenal striker Robin van Persie plans to treat his injured ankle by smothering it in placental fluid. Funny, because that description fairly well sums up Cristiano Ronaldo's fling with Paris Hilton. [Guardian]...

Is This The End Of Mark (And Baby) Mangino?
Kansas has launched an internal investigation of football coach Mark Mangino, which combined with five straight losses and an upcoming shellacking against Texas, could spell doom for the rotund coach. But what will become of his infant doppleganger?...