in Page 3734 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Well, That Was Anticlimactic
Congratulations, Stewart Cink, on your first major championship. Too bad no one cares. Do you remember who beat Jean Van de Velde in '99? All we'll remember from Turnberry is Tom Watson missing an 8-footer for the Claret Jug....

Now We'll Take You Seriously, Lady Soccer
With the top 3 goalies injured or away on national team duty, WPS's Washington Freedom taps coach to play goalie. They win by shutout, of course. [WaPo]...

Ross, You're A Heckuva Lot More Likely To Have Another Child Than Win Another Open
Ross Fisher, currently near the top at the Open, is ready to scurry off the course at any moment should his wife go into labor. "Hopefully, I can hang on for one more day, and hopefully she can." [NY Post]...

With No Regard For Human Life
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

And Now Let's End The Day With Michael Jordan And A Giant Inflatable Penis
I hope this post does not objectify Michael Jordan. The man can't help it if he's sexy. He just saunters his fine-ass around the golf course and people have normal, healthy reactions in his presence. Some people just go overboard....

Sometimes This World Is A Horrible Place To Live
ESPN's official comment on the Erin Andrews situation is this: "Erin has been grievously wronged here. Our people and resources are in full support of her as she deals with this abhorrent act." Mine is after the jump....

So What Were You Doing At Age 17?
Zac Sunderland is a 17-year-old California beach bum with shoulder-length locks and fears of conformity. So he's Jimmy Clausen, except he sailed around the world by himself. Winning in Touchdown Jesus' shadow? Try navigating away from pirates, dude....

And That's The Way It Is
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Erin Andrews' Attorney Speaks
Well, the mystery is solved, I guess. Yes, that was Erin Andrews on the video circulating around. Yes, they're pressing charges. The direct quote from the attorney circulating via PR newswire after the jump:...

Mutton Wins Again
Is there a bigger mismatch out there than little children vs. surly mutton? Seriously. They're like the Washington Generals on sheepback. Look, kids. Hang it up. You just aren't going to ride that mutton....

BB Assassins Take Pot Shots At Tour de France Riders
Two riders were hit by BBs during Stage 13 of the Tour, even though lunatic cycling fans can get close enough to club their victims with baguettes. Why not give your crazy violence a more personal touch? [VeloNews]...

The One With The Half-Naked Woman Selling A Dale Murphy Pennant
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

I'd Rather Tweet With The Saints
It was only a matter of time before a minor league baseball team whipped up a social networking promotion, and when charged with creating a snappy name for the event, why not go with Twitter-My-Face?...

ESPN Lawyers Try To Smoke Out Creepy Amateur Peephole Videographer (Update)
Yesterday a video posted on the site NSFW POA hinted that a naked blonde woman videotaped through a hotel peephole was a popular sports personality. ESPN lawyers pounced. Maybe we should mention the woman looks like Erin Andrews....

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Busch Stadium
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The St. Louis Cardinals' Busch Stadium....

And Now… Stars Who Could Have Used Helmets As Babies
If you're a parent, you know about the phenomenon known as Flat Head Syndrome, where a baby's head gets too flat in the back and they need to wear a helmet to correct it....

Adam Jones "Makin' It Rain": The Video (NSFW)
We compared the Las Vegas Journal Review's massive feature on the Minxx strip club incident to the Warren Report, but now we finally have the Zapruder Film. Video (that's probably not safe work) of Adam "Pacman" Jones making it rain....

Matt Bush Teaches Us A Valuable Lesson About When Not To Cry
By now, you've likely seen the above video of former Padres #1 overall pick Matt Bush being arrested and crying like a fat kid who can't open a peanut jar....

Angry Sheep, 1, Small Terrified Boy, 0
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....