in Page 4037 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
You Won't See Any Sammy Pahlsson Coverage On Al-Jazeera
we're not gonna make a "nobody watches the nhl" joke ... we're not gonna make a "nobody watches the nhl" joke ......
Gary Sheffield Is Full Of Opinions
As we sift through the carnage of yet another Gary Sheffield interview — and the accompanying brilliant Dugout reaction — we take a look back at the quotable career of Gary Sheffield. 100 Percent Injury Rate has compiled some of Gary's greatest hits throughout the years. Here are a few of our favori...
Eric Mangini Enjoys Vesuvio's
We like Jets coach Eric Mangini, even if he's way too young to be that football-coach tubby. But we — as obsessed "Sopranos" fans since the very first episode — hope he understands the honor bestowed upon him. He cameoed last night on what was one of the most intense, breathtaking episodes of the mo...
Thanks, LeBron, From Everybody
Because it happened over the weekend, we didn't get a chance to appropriately salute LeBron James and the Cavaliers not only for reaching the NBA Finals, but giving us a reason to watch those Finals. As the whole Cleveland area goes nuts, we note that even Spurs fans are happy with how this turned o...
To Watch Tonight...
• 8:00, ESPN. MLB. New York Yankees @ Boston Red Sox. Andy Pettitte selfishly pitches while Roger Clemens' groin is desperate for attention. • 9:00, NBC. Friday Night Lights. Matt Saracen vs. Johnnie Morton in a bare knuckle brawl ... who do you like? • 9:00, NFL Network. Tampa Bay Bucs Cheerleaders...
The Chestnut Vs. Kobayashi Rivalry Heats Up
LeBron James wasn't the only world-class athlete who made a significant breakthrough yesterday. Joey Chestnut sucked down 59 and 1/2 hot dogs in 12 minutes, breaking Takeru Kobayashi's previous record of 54 and 1/4. The feat was accomplished, as so many notable athletic feats are, at the Arizona Mil...
Jack Trudeau Likes Alcohol ... Policemen, Not So Much
It's that time of year. The kids are graduating from high school, and former Colts quarterbacks are getting them shitfaced. It seems like just yesterday, it was me donning the cap and gown, getting my diploma, and Jeff George threatening to beat my ass if I couldn't do a keg stand for 45 seconds....
About Last Night...
• NBA Playoffs. Cavs 98, Pistons 82. I don't think Rasheed Wallace is taking this well. • MLB. Padres 11, Nationals 3. Justin Germano refuses to lose. Ever. • NHL. Senators 5, Mighty Ducks 3. Candadian pride might yet be salvaged....
All The Sudden, Mike D'Antonio Seems Stoic And Emotionless
I particularly enjoyed the meticulous job of covering home plate in dirt. Paula Dean doesn't take that much care when she's baking a cake. Nor does she crawl around on the grass afterwards, and throw a rosin bag as if it were a grenade. But, I guess that's why she'll never be asked to manage the Mis...
You Say 'Monster Pig,' I Say 'Fred'
I could be wrong about this, but I think hunters would be less likely to thoughtlessly pump bullets into animals if they knew they had names. For instance, that giant pig that the 11-year-old killed? Would it have been so easy to pull the trigger (9 times) if the enormous animal had been wearing a n...
About Last Night...
• MLB. Yankees 9, Red Sox 5. Good news: Game 1 of the series, and we've already had 5 beanballs and 2 ejections. • Arena Football. Desperados 59, Soul 56. Desperado has finally come to his senses, it appears. • WNBA. Liberty 70, Lynx 60. Minnesota's 0-6, and I'm sure you know this, but that's the th...
A-Rod Is Dead, Dawg
• Jose Canseco and his fake reality show] • Cheese wheel. • Nothing offensive about this, nope. • This lady? Never heard of her. Until now! • Ichiro is wacky. • Every party should have Mr. Met. • LeBron might be all kinds of amazing. • Here come the otters! HERE COME THE OTTERS! • Isiah Thomas, a bu...
Who's the Next Allison Stokke?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
We Always Say Girl Plus Car Equals Dead Animal
We're gonna be a Deejay, man. And maybe a lumberjack....
Kick Satan Out Of Your Life With The Help Of The Indianapolis Indians
What's coming up in the world of minor league baseball ... we proudly present you with Rick Chandler's Minor Enterprise!...
Meet A-Rod's Lady
Today's Alex Rodriguez update: They've got the name of his lady, and she's a former Playboy model. She's Joslyn Noel Morse, and she was in this issue of "Casting Calls."...
Hog Kid Gets Swiftboated ... We Suppose It Was Inevitable
The legend of Hogzilla II ... was it all a hoax? Did 11-year-old Jamison Stone really down a 1,000-pound feral pig in the Alabama woods, or was he home watching The Andy Griffith Show that day? As a couple of commenters pointed out yesterday, the size of said pig may have been via Photoshop. And in ...
Down Goes Patel!
It's official, folks: Samir Patel, the perennial favorite who always just misses at the Spelling Bee, has just been eliminated from the Scripps Howard National Spelling Bee. The word he missed was "clevis."...
The Entry Ramps To The Stadium Will Be Full Of Sleeping People
It is important that, in life, one have humanitarian instincts. But it is far more important that one has a place to show and pick up stimulants at 3:30 in the morning. Yep: There's a bowl game named after a truck stop. It's the Roady's Humanitarian Bowl. ...
Mark Cuban Has A Thing For Girdle Pads
Finally, a pro football league with second-rate players which plays on Friday nights in places like San Antonio and Sacramento. It's like someone has been recording our dreams!...