ing Page 1323 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rick Ankiel Threw A Strike From Center Field
Houston's Jordan Schafer had 22 stolen bases last year, so he's not slow. But even he wasn't about to tag up and test the arm of Rick Ankiel, who showed the Astros' prudence to be warranted by hitting the catcher on the fly. Perhaps it wasn't strictly a strike (unless Larry Vanover was working the p...

Delonte West Earned A Technical Foul For Giving Gordon Hayward A Wet Willie
Delonte West's been a source of our amusement for some time, but his antics have run him afoul of the law—and NBA referees—more often than not. He somehow escaped ejection for tonight's shenanigans, in which he shoved a finger in Jazz swingman Gordon Hayward's ear in the second quarter of the Dal...

As A Thank-You For Luring Peyton Manning, The Broncos Sign Brandon Stokley
Brandon Stokley: great guy. Beloved teammate. Hell of a possession receiver, once upon a time. But he's coming up on 36 years old, gets hurt every year, and racked up a single reception in 2011 before injuring his quad in September before reaching an injury settlement with the Giants. So presumably ...

Can Anyone Stop The Los Angeles Kings?
The NHL playoffs have been their usual chaotic selves so far, with dashes of weird discipline and whatever the hell the Penguins-Flyers series is thrown in for good measure. There are just two impending sweeps: Penguins-Flyers, and Kings-Canucks. We can understand why the Flyers have spanked the Pen...

On NHL Suspensions And Eggshell Skulls
Shea Weber shoves Henrik Zetterberg's head into the glass: fine, no suspension. Byron Bitz hits Kyle Clifford from behind, sending him into the boards: two-game suspension. Matt Carkner sucker punches Brian Boyle, continuing to hit him after he goes down: one-game suspension. Carl Hagelin elbows Da...

There Was A Clown In Courtside Seats At MSG Yesterday, And For Once It Wasn't Donald Trump
Despite another strong game from Carmelo Anthony, the New York Knicks dropped their third straight this season to the Heat yesterday 93-85, a result we're sure put a sad face on all Knicks fans in attendance—at least those who didn't, you know, show up with a face already painted on....

James Jones Flopped, And It Sent Jeff Van Gundy On An Apoplectic Rant
ESPN basketball analyst Jeff Van Gundy has gone on rants about flopping before, but today's (sparked by a third-quarter dive by James Jones in the Heat-Knicks matchup) is one for the ages. Play-by-play man Mike Breen tries his hardest to get Van Gundy off the topic, but fails—JVG even runs over t...

The Cardinals Put The Rally Squirrel On Their World Series Rings
If being from St. Louis weren't already embarrassing, here's the rally squirrel, immortalized in gaudy jewels and precious metal. The rings, as noted in these consecutively written sentences were presented to the Cardinals yesterday and are meant to encapsulate the entire season....

Ian Eagle Had A Whiny Meltdown Last Night, Accused Partner Mike Fratello Of Being "Patronizing"
The final minutes of last night's YES Network broadcast of the Celtics-Nets game were awkward after veteran play-by-play rock Ian Eagle inexplicably voiced his complaints to analyst Mike Fratello on-air....

Today In Jose Canseco Tweets As Motivational Posters: The Duality Of Life
This is a feature wherein we celebrate Jose Canseco by creating motivational posters out of his actual tweets. We believe it is in this context that the world can best appreciate our favorite Bash Brother....

Lindsey Vonn Forgot To Pay Her Taxes
According to public records, Lindsey Vonn owes more than $1.7 million to the IRS in "delinquent federal taxes."...

The NHL Had A Good Day Yesterday
The Stanley Cup Playoffs, like the NBA playoffs, drag on for what feels like an eternity-spanning April, May and June. If every day shakes out the way yesterday did, however, then it might be worth it. Four games were played and three went to overtime. Four series had the chance to go 2-0 and all f...

History Lesson: The Time Matt Millen Punched The Patriots' General Manager In The Head
An occasional feature in which we recall notable incidents that we would've covered the hell out of had we existed at the time....

Bryan Stow And His Son Participate In Ceremonial First Pitch At San Francisco Giants Home Opener
Bryan Stow continues on his path to recovery following a vicious beating at Dodger Stadium that left him in a coma resulting in severe brain damage. The San Francisco Giants had hoped he would be able to attend Opening Day, but he remains in a care facility....

London Olympics Invite Keith Moon, Dead For 34 Years, To Play Closing Ceremony
There are just about a hundred days to go before the Summer Olympics, so presumably all the heavy lifting is done. The venues are built, the support staff hired and trained, and all that's left is getting the little touches right, so as to avoid incidents like Wayne Gretzky's face....

Man Charged With "Felony Secret Peeping" For Hiding Camera In Minor League Locker Room
The Carolina Mudcats are the Indians' single-A affiliate, and as a single-A baseball team may not have much in the way of locker room security. But staff members noticed an unfamiliar face poking around the visitors' locker room during a game Tuesday night—a man claiming to be a cleaning employee....

German Soccer Trolling Is The Best Trolling
In a match that may be the deciding factor in the German Bundesliga title race, Borussia Dortmund seized a 1-0 victory over Bayern Munich when keeper Roman Weidenfeller stopped Arjen Robben's penalty in the 82nd minute, leading to an extraordinary (and ballsy) act of trash-talking from Serbian de...
![Jabar Gaffney Is Having A Twitter Meltdown Over His Soon-To-Be Ex-Wife And A Former Teammate Who's Also His Cousin [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17jdx4lnn3e94jpg.jpg)
Jabar Gaffney Is Having A Twitter Meltdown Over His Soon-To-Be Ex-Wife And A Former Teammate Who's Also His Cousin [UPDATE]
We're not really sure what to make of what's been happening recently with the Twitter account of Redskins receiver Jabar Gaffney. So far as we can tell, Gaffney is none too happy with both free agent cornerback Lito Sheppard and his own wife, though it's not clear if one beef has anything to do with...

Remember When Gilbert Arenas And Javaris Crittenton Threatened To Shoot Each Other? JaVale McGee Started It.
Was it really more than two years ago that the Wizards locker room melted down in an orgy of simulated gunplay over a boo-ray debt? It was, and one of the principals—Gilbert Arenas, who allegedly brought four guns to the locker room and laid them out for Javaris Crittenton to choose—is finally shedd...

Shea Weber Avoids Suspension, Will Pay $2,500 Fine For Bashing Henrik Zetterberg's Head Into The Boards
Nashville captain Shea Weber won't miss any games of the Predators' opening round Stanley Cup playoffs series against Detroit after last night's incident in which he made Red Wings center Henrik Zetterberg's head extremely intimate with the glass....