ing Page 1358 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Offshore Yacht Racing Can Get Really Goddamn Expensive
The Puma Mar Mostro had her mast snapped on the first leg of the Volvo Ocean Race (which, if you're unfamiliar with yacht racing, makes the America's Cup look like a Boy Scout portage), and the crew wound up on a barely inhabited southern island roughly equidistant from South Africa and South Americ...

Not Even Degenerate Gamblers Care About Monday's Horrible Rams/Seahawks Game
According to Bodog's Sportsbook Manager, this week's Monday Night Football game is shaping up to see a historical lack of action. Says Richard Gardner, "with Bradford and Feeley both being questionable, and the fact that the game is on the West Coast this game is pacing to be the lowest bet Monday N...

FBI Investigates Russian Plot To Hack World Cup Bids, And Other FIFA-Related Treachery
When the wining World Cup bids were announced last year, it was hard not to wrinkle a Corrugator supercilii muscle. Russia had beat out luckless England for the 2018 World Cup. Even weirder was that Qatar had triumphed over the mighty USA for 2022. Now a squad of FBI agents attached to the "Eurasian...

ESPN Manufactures Favre Story Out Of Favre Dismissing ESPN's Manufactured Favre Story
Earlier this week, Michael Wright of ESPN Chicago reported that Brett Favre "would listen" to the Chicago Bears if they came calling and attempted to lure him out of retirement this season, even though it was considered "highly doubtful" that the team was even interested in the possibility. Over the...

ShortCenter: Someone Will Pay Albert Pujols A Shitload Of Money, Buster Olney Reports From Sad Hotel Lobby
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

The Foolproof Way To Find Out How Many Women Wear Thongs
Your morning roundup for Dec. 7, the day we learned the alien search is back on. Photo via Fox DC. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Weatherman Vowed To Wear Wife's Colts Panties If They Lost To The Patriots
Jim Kosek, an eager piece of on-air talent for AccuWeather in central Pennsylvania, apparently likes to start sentences with "Anyhoo." Which is especially rich when the sentence goes on to describe his wife's fandom for the Indianapolis Colts and how he'll wear her panties to work if they lost the...

Jared Allen Told Ray Edwards, "I'm Going To Punch You Square In Your Wiener, Dude" Before Punching Him Square In The Wiener
Maybe you've seen the video circulating this week that shows Minnesota's Jared Allen punching Atlanta's Ray Edwards directly in the crotch during the Falcons' 24-14 win in Week 12. If not, here it is, and here's Allen's frank explanation of the incident from today's episode of PFT Live:...

Barry Zito Ties The Knot, Looks Ridiculous In Wedding Photo
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!...

The Big East Apparently Plans To Save Itself By Having Members In All 50 States
In 2013, Boise State and San Diego State are joining for football only, while Houston, Southern Methodist, and Central Florida are coming for all sports. CBS Sports, which broke the story, has provided the handy map you see above to display the conference's electoral chances in 2012 clusterfuck of ...

Would Brett Favre Take A Phone Call From The Ice Capades? "I Don't Want To Go Into Hypotheticals," Agent Says
We put in another call to Brett Favre's agent, Bus Cook, this morning. Upon hearing that I was calling from Deadspin, he let out a long sigh, but was gracious enough to stay on the phone. In an effort to expand on ESPN's report from Monday—in which ESPN established via anonymous source that Brett Fa...

Fantasy Curling Is A Real Thing, And It Is Glorious
Remember how much fun we agreed curling was during the 2010 Winter Olympics in that city that got burned down? We had the choke-tastic American captain, that Canadian lady everyone loved, and everyone wrote about it the same way....

Stephon Marbury Does His Own Laundry In China
The Wall Street Journal visited Stephon Marbury in Beijing, where he's still playing ball for the CBA's undefeated Beijing Ducks and basking in the "serenity and peace of the country." Marbury is so zen he's even folding his own laundry in a modestly sized apartment. It's like StarburyTV never even ...

Report: All Eight Accusers Will Testify Against Jerry Sandusky At Next Week's Hearing
The preliminary hearings for Jerry Sandusky's child abuse case begin at the Centre County Court in Bellefonte, Pa., a week from today, and an ABC News report indicates that all eight alleged victims will testify against him....

The Two-Fisted, One-Eyed Misadventures Of Sportswriting's Last Badass
George Kimball hung upside down some 70 feet in the cold Manhattan air, still in need of a cigarette. Well, the doctors had said smoking would kill him, hadn't they? The previous autumn, they had found an inoperable cancerous tumor the size of a golf ball in his throat and given him six months to li...

Brian Cashman The Elf, Ken Rosenthal The Ninja, And Other Rumblings Around The Hot Fucking Stove
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall.) This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!...

Brett Favre's Agent Calls Back, Says Favre Has Not Talked To The Chiefs
Bus Cook let it ring twice and hung up before I had a chance to answer. I called him right back. "It was an accident," he said. "I didn't mean to call you." Not a big deal, I thought. What about the Chiefs? I asked. Would Favre be willing to talk to the Chiefs? I think he thought I meant to ask if ...

Brett Favre's Agent Is Not Answering The Phone At The Moment
ESPN told us Favre might talk to the Bears, and I've already asked about the Texans. This time, I wanted to know what Favre would do if the Chiefs called; would he listen to them, too? I left Bus Cook a voicemail. You heard it here first....

Would Brett Favre Answer The Phone If The Texans Called, Too? Brett Favre's Agent Does Not Know
In light of ESPN's exclusive that the Dongslinger "would listen" if the Bears reached out to him—even though they likely won't, according to the same report—I just called Favre's agent, Bus Cook. I asked about the Texans, because why the fuck not? "I don't know what he would do," Cook said. "I don'...

Brett Favre Would Answer The Phone If The Bears Called, According To Lamest Scoop Ever
Brace yourselves. ESPN is all over this one:...