ing Page 1362 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Columbia Bans Marching Band From 0-9 Football Team's Finale Because The Band Made Fun Of The Team
Aw, horseshit. The Ivy League fun police have lost their damn minds. Columbia's banned its marching band from playing at the football team's final game this weekend, because, after the last game, the band made fun of the team with new lyrics to the school's fight song. Please....

Papi In Baltimore, Prince In Italy, And Assorted Other Hot Stove Developments
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!...

Peyton Manning On Ole Miss Coaching Job Rumors: "Tell Them I'm 0-10 As An Assistant For Indianapolis”
Ole Miss fired head football coach Houston Nutt last week in the midst of his fourth season with the Rebels. He'll finish out the year in Oxford—his 2-8 squad hosts LSU this Saturday—but the search for his replacement is underway. And just a week in, it's already been suggested that Mississippi hire...

The MLS Goal Of The Year Is Incredible For Any League
Remember the name Darlington Nagbe: it's a wonderful name. But also because the Liberian-born, Ohio-raised midfielder was the second overall pick in this year's MLS draft, and scored his first career goal for Portland on this amazing juggle and volley in July. Today it was named the MLS Goal of th...

How Armen Keteyian Got His "Exclusive" "Interview" With Mike McQueary, And How CBS Screwed It Up
For the viewer, Monday and Tuesday evenings played out much the same. With little advance notice, a major news network promises an exclusive with a major figure in the Penn State scandal who has remained largely silent. With a quick press release and some social media goosing, the network hypes the ...

It Takes A Nickel On The Ground To End A Michael Spinks Interview: A Vignette From Joe Frazier's "Homegoing Ceremony"
I spent a lot of time this past week covering the public outpouring of love and respect in Philly for Smokin' Joe Frazier, the first guy to—as one preacher put it at yesterday's "Homegoing Ceremony"—"put [Muhammad] Ali on his ass." This, while Ali sat near the front of a behemoth church that holds ...

The Hot Stove Was Born 125 Years Today, And Other Exciting Hot Stove News
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!...

The iPhone's Siri Answered Bob Costas's Questions Better Than Accused Child Rapist Jerry Sandusky Did
Last night, Jerry Sandusky, the former Penn State assistant coach accused of raping boys, gave his first interview on the matter to Bob Costas. It didn't go so well. (Video is above, in case you missed it.) Deadspin correspondent Ben wanted to see if the iPhone's personal-assistant application, Si...

Meet The Minor Leaguer And Scam Artist Who Sold A Pittsburgh Pirate To Australia
Surely it was a surprising development when Pirates outfielder Xavier Paul agreed to sign with the Brisbane Bandits of the Australian Baseball League this season. But his agent dotted the I's and crossed the T's, and Brisbane rolled out the red carpet for Paul to make his debut last week....

Tony La Russa Wants Mike Matheny To Father His Grandchildren, And Other Hot Fucking Stove Developments
<emYour roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is...HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!...

Karlos Dansby Is The Best Linebacker In The NFL, According To Karlos Dansby
Karlos Dansby had an interception, a couple of passes defended, a quarterback hurry, and 10 tackles in his 2-7 team's win over the 3-6 Washington Redskins on Sunday. And after a performance like that, Karlos Dansby is quite convinced that Karlos Dansby is the best linebacker in the NFL....

Don Johnson, The Champagne King And The Beast Of Blackjack, Has Once Again Punished An Atlantic City Casino
After a few months of suspiciously restrained behavior, blackjack savant Don Johnson has returned. He was spotted in October in Atlantic City stuffing fistfuls of casino chips into his gullet. Just grinding them up between his world-class molars. No, I made that up. He was actually cashing in fistfu...

Eli Manning Lost To Alex Smith, Is A Bum: Your Sunday NFL Roundup
For whatever reason, Eli will always be considered a terrible quarterback. Maybe it's because he is a contemporary of some very, very good quarterbacks—one of whom is his big brother—or maybe it's because he is kind of a doofus. Or maybe it's because he lost to Alex Smith and is terrible. Either wa...

Give A Hoot, Don't Pollute Your Insides With A Rat
"A white owl was seen chowing down on an unfortunate rodent right on the edge of the crossbar in the Metropolitan Stadium." The meal took place at halftime of an eventual tie between Colombia and Venezuela in a South American World Cup qualifier. Oh, and there's video, too. ...

The Wilson Ramos Rescue Featured A Gunfight In The Mountains
Washington Nationals catcher Wilson Ramos was rescued last night and that is a very good thing. An even better thing? The rescue involved "Venezuelan police commandos" engaged in a "hair-raising" gunfight with his captors in a remote mountainous area....

High School Football Coach Resigns After Distributing "I Am A Queer" "Hurt Feelings" Questionnaire To Team
Here's one from the You Can't Make This Shit Up department. Pat Lynch is a high school football coach in Wyoming. He has been the coach for the Buffalo Bison since 1998 and won back to back state titles in 2004 and 2005. He is a leader of men. But not girly-men. Oh, no. Get that weak shit out of he...

LaVar Arrington Speaks At Penn State Candlelight Vigil
"We are Penn State. That'll never change. ... Understand this is really a call to duty." That, courtesy of Andy Staples. Arrington was one of several to speak at the candlelight vigil organized by Penn State students in the wake of the havoc Sandusky, et al. have wrecked....

<em>Washington Post</em> Reports That Wilson Ramos Has Been Rescued
"Wilson Ramos has been rescued in Venezuela and is with the police on his way back home, his agent, Gustavo Mercano, said in a phone conversation. The Interior Minster [sic] called to tell the family at roughly 10 minutes before 10 p.m. East Coast time....

Bam! Pig Humping A Cow!
I have no idea if this will actually work, but if it does make babies, I want to eat them....

Manny Pacquiao Sings An Awkward, Tender "Sometimes When We Touch" Duet Live On Canadian Television
Manny Pacquiao was on TSN's Off The Record this afternoon, and was surprised mid-interview with the sound of Dan Hill's voice—the same Dan Hill who wrote "Sometimes When We Touch," which is a Pacquiao standard by now. Naturally, the two men sang a duet to close the interview....