ing Page 1505 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Little Holier-Than-Thou From Someone Who Handles Pigskin Every Week, Don't You Think?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Who Said Mike Tyson Can't Still Throw A Punch?
Tyson's been arrested at LAX after getting into a fight with paparazzi. Tracking... (but not really, because who really gives a sh*t anymore.) [TMZ]...

Finally, A Championship That Could Actually Save Detroit
Joe Cada, a 21-year-old from Shelby Township, Michigan, won the World Series of Poker's $8.55 million Main Event prize. That's like half the state's GDP. (By the way, 21 is also Michigan's legal gambling age, so....beginner's luck, right?) [Detroit4Lyfe, Freep]...

You'd Lose Your Mind Too, If You Had To Coach Hockey In Louisiana
Brent Sapergia only lasted two games as coach of the Louisiana IceGators, but he made them count—getting thrown out of both and making himself internet famous with an epic, bench-clearing temper tantrum....

Sammy Sosa Doesn't See Why People Are So Terrified By His Appearance
The formerly dark-skinned Sosa spoke out about his ghostly new look and he would like to let everyone know that he's not dying or anything: "It's a bleaching cream," he said. You don't say....

He Got You, My Pretty
Former Wisconsin Badger Darin Schubring lost a bar fight was sucker-punched by a man wearing a Flying Monkey costume. That's slightly more embarrassing than being referred to, 25 years later, as "Baraboo local legend." But only slightly. [Baraboo News Republic]...

The Clemson Women's Rowing Team About To Become Famous For All The Wrong Reasons
And that's...start again. And there's...no. Sigh. These poor girls. Nice win at the Hooch, though! [ClemsonTigers.cstv]...

Michael Phelps Wears "Old-Style" Swimsuit And Facial Hair, Suddenly Sucks
"Sporting a beard and an old-style swimsuit, Michael Phelps missed out on two finals and barely qualified for a third Tuesday at a World Cup short-course meet." [AP]...

A Few Million Pesos Later, Angel Villalona Is A Free Man, For Now
Angel Villalona, the Giants prospect accused of fatally shooting a man in his native Dominican Republic, is out on bail and out 2 million pesos, too, having reportedly paid the victim's family to drop charges against him. That's $55,000....

He'll Never Be Banned From The Gambling Hall of Fame
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Desperate Redskins Fans Export Angry Sign Holding Jobs
Since Generalissimo Snyder has banned all forms of public expression with his eyesight, Washington fans who wished to mock him were forced to drive to Atlanta just to put bags over their head and look sad....

The Handwringing Over Jeremy Tyler's Foreign Adventure Has Begun
Jeremy Tyler left high school to play professionally in the Holy Land, where the plan was to do a credible Kevin Garnett impression and expose the folly of the minimum-age rule. The plan was not to play like Oliver Miller....

“My Coach Broke My Collarbone.” Your First Edition Of A-HOLE COACH DIGEST
I've been thinking about terrible coaches lately. Coaches that are not merely incompetent, but also paranoid, megalomaniacal, and prickish. Coaches that are praised for having such qualities, particularly at the college and high school levels....

Making Out At The Game? Bring Your Own Cheering Section
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Your Late Games Open Thread
No one disputes Dan Snyder's lack of football acumen, but John Riggins goes so far as to call him "a bad guy." While maybe not a war criminal, the Skins' season ought to be called the new Trail of Tears....

SDSU AD Gets His Mack On, At School Expense
Jeff Schemmel is under fire for traveling for trysts with a married woman, while expensing the trips to San Diego State. That's gotta be some kind of recruiting violation....

English Language 1, Washington Fans 0
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Everything You Need To Know About What It's Like To Do Color Analysis For Richmond Vs. Villanova
I'm sure when he says "bum" he means "hero" and when he says "end this fucking game" he means "what an exciting 4th quarter." [Bsmeddy You Tube]...

Yankee Bromances Abundant In City Of Sleeplessness
I can't really condemn these scruffy-faced Yankee fans for their jubilant man-love after the Yankees World Series victory. I probably made out with at least three dudes at Dirty Frank's last year after the Phillies won....

Donald Sterling Continues To Get Away With Being The Most Evil Man In Sports
Racist greedhead Donald Sterling will pay $2.73 million to settle a federal housing bias lawsuit accusing him of all kinds of sleazy and thuggish behavior, none of which matters in David Stern's NBA if you're an owner....