ing Page 1645 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Welcome To The Land Of Turducken
Prepare for this exact scene tomorrow: Brett Favre eating turkey and receiving backslaps on the Lions' home field. (We're not sure, but we believe this picture was taken in 1983.)...
Well, Our Weekend Is Planned
When you say that USA Today doesn't bring the serious, in-depth news coverage, I counter with this recent headline: Mexican Dwarfs Seek Respect In Bullfighting. I accept your apology. Seriously, how could your day not turn out great when it starts with that headline in your e-mail inbox?...
Yet Another Reason Never To Visit Hawaii
OK, maybe Duke's a little better than we realized. And maybe Illinois still hasn't learned how to shoot. Here you see Brian Randle, fouling someone, as usual. Duke's good again, everybody: Spread the word. Then cringe....
Welcome Back, Duke Haters
We know the college basketball is officially underway because ... everyone's Duke bile is building! We've missed it; it's nice having villains, even if they haven't actually done that much lately that was particularly villainous....
About Last Night
What you missed while bidding a sad farewell to Mr. Whipple ... • College basketball: Please don't squeeze the Chaminade. • NFL: So, the Broncos and Chargers are both in first place? What? Denver 34, Tennessee 20. • The New York Rangers really, really hate Rick DiPietro....
Sure, He's, Uh, Doing Some Bobcats Scouting
We were busy at this show tonight, so we're late on the uptake, but we will say this: We don't think we'll ever get used to seeing Michael Jordan wearing Illini colors. We wonder if Tar Heels fans will ever get used to it either....
Mike Tyson's Full Day In Jail
We're not sure why, but we feel compelled to write about Mike Tyson today. You could pretty much write about Mike Tyson every day, or never write about him at all, and you'd still satisfy all sides....
Ron Zook Continues To Piss Intensity
After Illinois' oddly easy win over Northwestern — to win the Sweet Sioux Tomahawk, whatever that is — on Saturday, the most amazing Illini season we can remember draws to a close. Which means, of course ... it's time for the Ron Zook Water Skiing Photo! The man pisses intensity....
Troy Aikman Gets Something Right
I was just getting ready to throw some love on Clinton Portis myself. Costumes aside, he's an absolute beast. He's a better blocker than any featured back in the league (Edge included) and if the Redskins throw a pick, odds are Clinton's going try to send the interceptor to the hospital. Jason Campb...
Nothing Is Over Until We Decide It Is! Yah, That's a Good One.
• 12:00 — MLS: Houston vs. New England for the MLS Cup [ABC] • 12:30 — Movie: Animal House [USA ] (ed. note: :( ) • 1:00 — NFL: Local breakdown of FOX's early games [FOX] • 1:00 or 4:00 — NFL: Local breakdown of CBS games [CBS] • 3:00 — LPGA: ADT Championship, Final Round [NBC] • 3:30 — Movie: Under...
Fight! Fight! Fight!
• Catching up on Cotto vs. Mosley. Wow, that fight was actually better than I was led to believe. The first six rounds might have not produced knockdowns or blood but they were some of the most intensely competitive rounds I've seen in quite some time . It's not often that you get to see two fantast...
That Looks Uncomfortable
I don't even know what to say, just sit back and take it all in....
Television! Teacher, Mother, Secret Lover
• 12:00 — La Liga: Real Madrid vs. Mallorca [Gol TV] • 12:00 — CFB: Ohio State at Michigan [ABC] • 12:00 — CFB: Northwestern at Illinois [ESPN] • 12:45 — Movie: Election [Showtime] • 1:00 — Euro 2008 Qualifying: Israel vs. Russia [FCS] • 2:30 — "CFB": Duke at Notre Dame [NBC] • 3:00 — Classic Boxing...
Dennis Dixon Has Balls of Uranium
So it's official, Dennis Dixon tore his ACL ... two weeks ago. So that first quarter touchdown run on Thursday night just went from awesome to unbefuckinglievable....
Everybody Keep Piling On Notre Dame!
As we come to the final death spasms of the glory/hideousness of the Notre Dame season, we stop to do a brief dance on the Irish grave. How bad has it become? Freaking Duke thinks it has a chance to win in South Bend this weekend....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your favorite t-shirt commits suicide in the dryer ... • College football: Oregon at Arizona. Ducks march toward a royal screwing when they hand out the bowl bids. [ESPN] • College basketball: 2K Sports College Hoops Classic, semifinals, at New York, Connecticut vs. Gardner-Webb; Me...
How Hillary Is Like Grandmama
There's another one of those presidential debates tonight — this one's the Democrats, their 592th — and as that race starts to veer toward the more interesting, MSNBC brings up a fun parallel: The candidates are just like early '90s basketball teams....
Early 2000s Kings Get Their "Wacky Pose"
Remember how, when you were in Little League, right after you did the "serious" team photo, you got to do a "wacky" one? We used to put our hat backwards and pull up one pantleg. We were pretty freaking hilarious when we were 10. Anyway, the 2002 Kings apparently pulled a similar stunt....