ing Page 593 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kirk Cousins Isn’t Worth A Shit
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
![MLB Is Investigating Domingo Germán Under League's Domestic Violence Policy [Updates]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/rin0aqshhr6zfiipoaxd.jpg)
MLB Is Investigating Domingo Germán Under League's Domestic Violence Policy [Updates]
New York Yankees pitcher Domingo Germán has been placed on paid administrative leave, MLB said in a statement this afternoon, as the league investigates the 27-year-old starter under their domestic violence policy. Germán’s leave could last up to seven days, after which, barring an extension, the co...
There's Nothing More Predictable Than Mike Leach Suddenly Having Dumb Thoughts About Homeless People
College football coaches tend to be graded on a steep and extremely generous curve when it comes to their personalities. How well they do or don’t do their jobs is easy enough to assess, because it creates a binary win/loss record that reflects the sum of the players they recruit and the assistants ...
Tessa Virtue And Scott Moir Retire From Skating, Hopefully To Spend More Time Makin' Out
On Tuesday, Canadian ice dancers and two-time Olympic gold medalists Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir officially announced their intentions to “step away” from ice dancing after their cross-Canada tour in October. Though they leave the sport perhaps the greatest ice dancing team of all time, their career...
Best Sports To Read To, Ranked
The thing about reading a book is that it is absolutely, undeniably a sport. Not only does reading a book require endurance, concentration, and a good amount of practice, it is also occasionally competitive. For sure, working so hard to get AR points for reading The Golden Compass or some long doors...
Malcolm Gladwell Goes On Bill Simmons's Podcast To Dust Off The Oldest, Dumbest Defense Of Joe Paterno
There’s no good reason to consider Malcolm Gladwell a serious writer or thinker anymore, thanks in large part to the things Gladwell continues to write and think. Despite this, he was allowed to write a new book—if you want to know more about it, I suggest clicking on this review in The Atlantic and...
Heartwarming: Paul Finebaum Gets His Ass Handed To Him Over Lazy Cam Newton Take
ESPN made some good TV this morning. ...
This Might Finally Be It For Eli Manning
“They absolutely are this bad,” Barry Petchesky wrote about the New York Giants exactly 365 days ago. The team had just lost to the Dallas Cowboys in a supremely listless Monday Night Football appearance. I watched it with a friend who was visiting from out of town amid a rapidly thinning crowd in a...
Large Norwegian Teen Has Now Graduated To Crushing Grown Men
Last time we checked in on Erling Braut Håland, the enormous Viking kid had demolished a team of children by scoring nine goals in a single U-20 World Cup match. If you were wondering if the 6-foot-3 teen’s size, strength, and skills would carry over when pitted against adults, the answer is a resou...
Lightning Strikes Jamaican Soccer Field, Sends Three Players To The Hospital
On Monday, a soccer match in Jamaica between Jamaica College and Wolmer’s Boys was suspended in the 84th minute after a bolt of lightning struck the pitch. The bolt’s impact sent several players to the ground, and a total of three players were taken to the hospital in the aftermath. Here’s video of ...
NBA Considers Raising Fine For Tampering To Four Times The Fine For Being Donald Sterling
Tampering is the gripe of the hour among NBA owners, which explains why the league’s board of governors will vote on new measures this coming Friday. “It’s pointless, at the end of the day, to have rules that we can’t enforce,” reads a quote by NBA commissioner Adam Silver in the middle of an ESPN s...
The Giants Are Inching Closer And Closer To The Daniel Jones Era
For the second straight week, Eli Manning was outplayed by the quarterback opposite him, and this time, it felt a whole lot worse. While there’s not much shame in losing in Dallas to Dak Prescott when he throws for over 400 yards and puts up a perfect 158.3 QB rating, Week 2 brought fewer chances fo...
Zlatan Punted Sporting Kansas City Into Orbit With Yet Another Hat Trick
At some point, Zlatan Ibrahimović will wear out his welcome in MLS, but that moment has thankfully not come just yet. Beyond all the shit-talking and dunking on MLS of the likes which we here at Deadspin can only aspire to, Zlatan’s still got it on the field, which must make his shtick easier to tak...
If You Can Believe It, The Saints Got Horribly Screwed By Another Bad Call
Jared Goff fumbled, and Saints defensive end Cam Jordan picked it up. He was on his way to an 87-yard touchdown when the referees blew the play dead. Crew chief Walt Anderson ruled that Goff’s arm was going forward. Incomplete pass....
The Dolphins Are Stale Piss From The Gutter
The Dolphins, a team set up to execute one of the most brazen tanking campaigns in NFL history, were so bad in Week 1 that a handful of players were reportedly calling their agents after the game and begging to be traded. Somehow, Miami was even worse today against the Patriots....
American Pharoah, Welcome To The Resistance (Or Maybe Not)
Between this and the doping, I don’t think I can let my children watch horse racing anymore. At a meeting of House Republicans in Baltimore on Friday, Mike Pence offered a vaguely perturbing, folksy anecdote about Triple Crown winner American Pharoah once biting him on the arm, turning it into a dop...
Deadspin, Ranked
Today is my last day as your social media person here at good ol’ Deadspin dot com. I truly cannot think of any better way to say goodbye to this site than by ranking everything I’ve enjoyed about it, including my colleagues and you, the readers....
Shaun Livingston Outlasted Everything
Given everything we know and can reasonably surmise about where the organization was and the people in charge of it, it seems safe to say that the Los Angeles Clippers didn’t have anything specific in mind when they drafted Shaun Livingston out of an Illinois high school with the fourth pick of the ...
Sign Up For The Deadspin Newsletter, Then Sign Up Your Enemies
Many people have come up to me—on the street, at a restaurant, in my bathroom—with tears in their eyes, and they’ve asked, “Sir, when is the Deadspin newsletter coming back?” Great news for them: It’s back. Sign up here. ...
Interminable Mike Pereira Rules Monologue Interrupted Several Times By Ghastly Football
The NFL’s got to clean this crap up. The Thursday night game between the Panthers and Buccaneers was already a hellish, dismal slog, featuring punchless, amateurish offense run by a pair of deeply disinterested quarterbacks. Then the fourth quarter rolled around, and what might’ve otherwise been at ...