ing Page 633 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The NBA's Anti-Tanking Reform For Sure Hasn't Solved Sucking
The NBA recently messed with the odds in the draft lottery in order to discourage teams from tanking, but the real fruits of that move will be revealed over time, and anyway certain teams—looking at you, Phoenix—need no promise of draft lottery gold in order to just profoundly suck and lose all the ...
Reebok To Women: Empower Yourself By Sitting On Men's Faces<em></em>
Reebok Russia’s attempt to inject a progressive message into its recent marketing campaign has blown up in its face. This is because it was about face-sitting....
Let's Remember Some Minor League Guys, For Some Reason
If I may, I would like to take you Behind The Game for a moment. While the packs that we open on Let’s Remember Some Guys come from various sources—readers and friends of the program send some our way, most notably with The Big Goofy Treasure Trove Box full of commons that was mailed to us by an ano...
Look At This Fucking Soft-Ass Pud
Behold Donald Trump Jr., failed son of a failed son....
Alina Zagitova Says She Didn't Drink Water During The 2018 Olympics
Alina Zagitova, the Russian teen who narrowly edged two-time defending world champion Evgenia Medvedeva for the women’s figure skating gold at the 2018 Winter Olympics and recently took second at the European Championships, sat down for a series of interviews this week with Russian media. One of the...
Tom Wilson Got Brutal Revenge For A Dirty Hit By Ian Cole
This guy again, huh? Yeah. It had been by my count a little over three weeks since Capitals violence-lover Tom Wilson last dropped the gloves, so he must have been just twitching from withdrawal, aching to go out and throw some haymakers at an opponent. It was Colorado Avalanche defenseman Ian Cole ...
You're Not Going To Believe This, But Ernie Grunfeld Said Something Very Dumb To Defend His Very Dumb Decisions
The Wizards, in their ongoing quest to be the most irrelevant American professional sports team, have now traded away every one of their own second-round draft picks between now and 2024. They’ve dealt three second-round picks in salary dump moves just this season; yesterday they dealt a future seco...
David De Gea Is Proof That Goalkeepers Should Embrace The Kick Save
You can not read the book on goalkeeping because the book does not exist, and that is for the better. A book might be helpful for outlining fundamentals and common techniques, but it might also be an anchor drowning effectiveness in a pool of orthodoxy, a dagger sacrificing creative problem-solving...
The Sacramento Kings Are Done Waiting<em></em>
The Mavericks traded Harrison Barnes last night, in a transaction that chiefly made news because it happened in the middle of a game and later drew the ire of a man who has casually shipped out entire rosters of his teammates ahead of trade deadlines past. How could an NBA team, LeBron James asked, ...
40 Years Ago, Antonio Inoki Maybe Possibly Almost Wrestled Against Idi Amin<em></em>
As a mainstream athlete, Antonio Inoki is probably best known for battling Muhammad Ali to a draw in an actual on-the-level fight—albeit one restricted by last-minute rule changes—after The Greatest backed out of plans to lose a traditional entertainment wrestling match. But Antonio Inoki is not a m...
The Eastern Conference Playoffs Are Going To Be Good As Hell
The Eastern Conference has been dogshit since I started watching basketball, and though the conference’s 2019 Finals participant will surely be skiing uphill in pursuit of a title, the three most significant trades of deadline week all featured Eastern Conference teams getting better by acquiring pl...
Marlins Trade J.T. Realmuto To The Phillies, Who Are Quickly Going All-In
Woo-hoo, we got some real, honest-to-god MLB transaction news to talk about! Hooray! After a long winter of drawn-out rumors, the Marlins have decided to trade top catcher J.T. Realmuto to the Phillies in exchange for an enticing if unproven bag of a few players and potential future players....
Markelle Fultz Shooting Form Update: In Peace
Honestly, yes, let this poor soul go figure out his whole deal someplace warm, somewhere nobody’s watching the basketball, where there are no point guards and no Jimmy Butlers....
Bryce Harper Met With The Giants, But That Won't Work Out Either
It is extremely difficult to talk about the continuing free agencies of Bryce Harper and Manny Machado without finding yourself trapped in a valley of nihilistic despair, with no hope of escape besides the sudden appearance of a “mystery team” savior. With five days until Spring Training begins, eve...
One Week After Declaring They Would Not Trade Otto Porter, The Wizards Trade Otto Porter For A Pile Of Trash
Almost exactly one week ago, Wizards owner Ted Leonsis mocked the very notion of his team trading any of John Wall, Bradley Beal, or Otto Porter, describing it as essentially a wacky, unworkable, and short-sighted fan theory....
This Is The Virginia I Remember
I was born and reared in Virginia and still hold fondness for the state as often as it embarrasses me and anybody who claims it. Times like these. That blackface/klansman photo that will end up getting the governor bounced was in a yearbook, after all, from a state school....
The Kristaps Porzingis Trade Had Been Building For Longer Than Any Of Us Realized
Last Thursday’s trade that sent a disgruntled (or at least mildly gruntled) Kristaps Porzingis to the Mavericks came as a shock to many around the league, not least among them Knicks fans. Where did this come from? Why did this happen so quickly? Why didn’t the Knicks shop around for better offers? ...
John Wall Imperils Several Perfectly Fine Ligaments Threatening JuJu Smith-Schuster Over Injury Joke
Steelers wide receiver JuJu Smith-Schuster gave some very mild business to John Wall over the particulars of his latest injury, which involved Wall rupturing his Achilles tendon while walking around his own home. Wall is no doubt in a sensitive state of mind at the moment, and he was not amused:...
Jakub Vrana Nefariously Dinged It Off The Goalie's Back For A Goal
NHL goalies, traditionally, are used by teams to keep the puck out of their own net. But what if they could be corrupted? What if, for example, an enterprising and devious young Washington winger could turn, hypothetically, a Vancouver goaltender’s own body against him? What if a Machiavellian Capit...
Pacers Fans Taunt Brandon Ingram With Ruthless "LeBron's Gonna Trade You" Chant
The Lakers are very sleepily facing the Indiana Pacers Tuesday night. Everything about this game feels dreary and perfunctory—the Lakers have already offered up half their roster in a trade for Anthony Davis, while the Pacers are playing out the string on a season that lost much of its promise once ...