ing Page 743 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Bryce Harper Will Cruelly Reclaim His Outfield Spot From Young Victor Robles
The Washington Post reported today that Bryce Harper will be activated Monday after missing 40 games due to an injured WHOA HEY VICTOR ROBLES DID SOMETHING....
Boycotters, Welcome: Today's Guide To Ignoring The NFL
There may never have been a better time in the modern history of the NFL to be a competing network. NFL ratings appear to be down, although no one is exactly clear on why, or for how long it might last. But a segment of sports fans you might otherwise consider among the NFL’s base—dumbasses, basical...
You Only Get To Do This If You Win
Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], call our confidential tips hotline at (347) 746-8471, or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and sign up for our newsletter!...
Let's Remember Some Guys
On Wednesday, our old pal Jack Dickey tweeted out a list of random ballplayers that he had written down as a child:...
Fuck Sports Bottles<em></em>
I thought I was done. My kids were no longer babies, which meant no more formula, which meant no more time laboring at the sink, hand-washing 90 separate Dr. Brown’s bottle parts and leaving them soaking on a dishtowel to dry. That part of my life, as far as I was concerned, was over....
Sam Bradford's Knee Injury Is Starting To Seem Serious
After Sam Bradford had to miss last Sunday’s game, Vikings head coach Mike Zimmer was coy on just how severe Bradford’s knee injury may be. Now, it’s not looking so good....
This Fucking Heiress Kicked Her Horse!
Jazz Johnson-Merton, a 36-year-old heiress to the Johnson & Johnson fortune, competed in a show jumping event earlier this month. At one point, the dreaded heiress fell off her horse and got so mad that she kicked the poor animal....
Reds, Padres, Mariners, Rockies Announce Plans To Expand Protective Netting
The Reds, Padres and Mariners announced today that they would be expanding protective netting at their ballparks, while the Rockies said that they were in talks to set official plans to do so. The announcements came one day after a young girl was struck by a line drive at Yankee Stadium and hospital...
Amazon Is Getting Into Streaming Tennis
There are surely a whole raft of reasons that tennis no longer enjoys the mainstream U.S. popularity of say, the McEnroe-Connors era, but one big one springs to mind: Where the hell do you even find it?...
Kickboxing Superstar Gökhan Saki Is Ready To Shake Up The UFC
There’s not a ton of top-line UFC talent fighting this fall. Mighty Mouse and Tony Ferguson are both fighting for titles (sort of) in October, but David Branch just co-headlined a card, and there’s not really that many fights that grab your attention until November’s bonkers Madison Square Garden ca...
The Mad Pooper Is Not Alone: Your Best Stories Of Crapping On The Run
A jogger known as the Mad Pooper has caused an uproar across Colorado Springs with the public turds that she’s been dropping in and around one family’s yard, and allegedly a few other places too. Colorado Springs police are on the case, although a particularly exasperated public information officer ...
Andre Ward Announces Retirement
Andre Ward, the light heavyweight considered by many to be the best pound-for-pound boxer in the world, has announced his retirement....
Come Bask In The Glow Of Rocky Gale's Delight At His First Major-League Home Run
Rocky Gale is 29 years old. He has been in San Diego’s minor-league system since 2010, and he has spent almost all of that time in Triple-A. Other than a very brief showing as a September call-up in 2015—eleven games, only one of which he got to play more than three innings, with ten plate appearanc...
Finally, There Will Be Pro Wrestling On A Cruise Ship
Theme cruises are popular. The website Theme Cruise Finder lists more than 500 upcoming cruises, in categories ranging from comedy (there’s a Chris Tucker cruise next week) to History & World Affairs (there are two New York Times cruises coming up) to sports (the Dallas Cowboys Fans Cruise sets sail...
Baseball Team Cruelly Loses Game Eight Innings After Celebrating Championship
At least the Wichita Wingnuts got to savor the taste of victory, as they streamed out of the dugout onto the field to celebrate clinching the championship of the American Association, an independent baseball league, on a ninth-inning groundout. Unfortunately, they didn’t actually win the game. ...
Report: Wheaton College Football Players Hazed Freshman In 2016, Still Played This Season
Five Wheaton College (Ill.) football players, including the son of Fox Sports football analyst Chris Spielman, were charged Monday with felonies after they allegedly hazed and beat a freshman in 2016 and left him half-naked on a baseball field....
Robert Griffin III And Santana Moss Are Sniping About Mike Shanahan's Firing
Former Washington wide receiver Santana Moss, who retired in 2014, went on 106.7 The Fan in Washington D.C. yesterday morning and dredged up some good gossip from the early-2010s Skins teams. Moss played with Robert Griffin III for three seasons, two of which came under coach Mike Shanahan. In their...
No Justice For Good Boys
“WHORE the ramparts, weeee watched...” Some lady was singing the national anthem. “WHORE the lan-nnddd of the freeee...” We don’t care about that. We don’t care about any of that. We only want the Grade-A violence, now. ...
Ben McAdoo Calls Out Eli Manning, But The Giants Have Much Bigger Problems
It was just one play. It was a big play, potentially a crucial one, but we’re probably not sitting here dissecting it as if one delay-of-game penalty was responsible for all the Giants’ ills if coach Ben McAdoo hadn’t (deservedly/unusually) put the blame squarely on Eli Manning....
Washington Ends Su'a Cravens's Season Before He Gets A Chance To Show Up
Roughly two weeks ago, Washington safety Su’a Cravens abruptly told management that he planned to retire from the NFL. He didn’t say why, but the team apparently convinced him to change his mind for a little while and placed him on the exempt/left squad list, which would give him a month to decide w...