is Page 6049 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
You Don't Know The Power Of The Dark Side
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not modeling Shaq's "Kazaam" underwear, he can be found studying the ancient art of the Jedi at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • Dark forces r...
I Love You Sweeeeaaaatshirt! (Red Hooded) Sweeeeeeaaaatshirt
What they're saying from the Patriots' perspective about the New York Giants' 17-14 win over New England in Super Bowl XLII ......
Giants Win! New York Is Very Drunk Right Now! Weee!
What they're saying from the Giants' perspective about New York's 17-14 win over the New England Patriots in Super Bowl XLII ......
Eli Manning Plays With Your Perceptions Of Reality
As amazing as Eli Manning was last night, it might have behooved someone on the Giants, whether it was a PR person or just an assistant coach, to inform him that when you win the Super Bowl, you're supposed to take your pads off before you put on the championship T-shirt. Doofy fella kept those pad...
The Patriots Are, At Last, Losers. Like The Rest Of Us.
It is rare in the world of sports to find a moment when two revelatory, unifying moments converge into something that stuns us all, from every direction. Around 10:20 p.m. ET last night, the sports planet's tectonic plates shifted so dramatically that we thought our heads would never stop spinning...
About Last Night
What you missed while pondering issues much more important than football ... • Super Bowl: New England Patriots win as expected. Brady named MVP; everyone's predictions turn out to be true. I see absolutely no way that writing this on Sunday morning can turn out to be a bad idea. • Super Bowl: It's ...
Your Shocking Super Bowl Champion New York Giants
OK, we could watch football for the next 20 years, and we're not sure we'd ever see a play as amazing and improbable and insane and ridiculous and surreal and let's-face-it-gang batshit crazy as watching Eli Manning escape that sack and David Tyree make that catch. And then Manning finds Plaxico ....
Super Bowl XLII Fourth Quarter Live Blog
Ten total points in this game. Ten. Farking TEN POINTS. But it's close, and when it comes to neutral fans, a close game is all one can ask for at this stage of the game. Follow the season's final 15 minutes after the jump....
Super Bowl XLII Third Quarter Live Blog
Tom Brady had moments of happiness between moments of being crunched into the ground. The slim 7-3 lead is not safe by any means, the way this thing's going. Let's see what happens in the third quarter, shall we?...
Super Bowl XLII Second Quarter Live Blog
Well, that was fast. Let's do another quarter, just like the other one. The score is Giants 3, Patriots 0, and I'll go out on a limb that because the game isn't being played in the 1940s, the lead and score won't hold....
Super Bowl XLII First Quarter Live Blog
This game has been tied for two weeks. Christ, somebody score already. Follow the first quarter football happenings and corporate marketing snippets after the jump....
Stretch Your Legs, It's Almost Here
So what's gonna happen is in exactly two hours we'll begin the live blog celebrations. This will give me ample time to nap, eat, and ... wow, there's been a Frosted Flake in my beard all this time, and nobody told me!...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while asking the referee for his phone number ... • 6:17 p.m. — Super Bowl XLII: Pittsburgh Steelers at Dallas Cowboys. (Just seeing who really reads these.) [FOX] Alternative Super Bowl Programming • 6: p.m. — My Big Breasts And Me. "Three women openly discuss the negative impact thei...
Santonio Holmes and McLovin, Best Buds
• The seven best moments from the Maxim party. [Rotoworld] • Let's try to buy Liverpool FC! [Machochip] • Heath Shuler, defender of NFL in church. [Scott Van Pelt Style] • The Patriots have the Steelers' dynasty to thank. [Mondesi's House] • Shooting in Omaha was either a hate crime or being pissed ...
Robert Z. Nemeth Doesn't Care About Oddly Shaped Balls
Know what's great? (Besides those Jimmy Dean microwaveable breakfast sandwiches. Mmm mmm. I'm not actually sure why I brought this up, it's really a tangential point to the entire post.) Opinion columns written by old men who complain about everything. Enter the fray, Robert Z. Nemeth, about how foo...
It's Normal And Natural To Watch Old Super Bowl Highlights
Last night, while the world wept over videotapes and dynasties, ESPN2 strung together a bunch of those NFL Films specials of Super Bowl highlights. It might've been the most sports they've aired on one channel in quite some time....
Which Patriots Video Is Scarier?
With little on TV, it's time to partake in some of the Internet's finest available video pertaining to those with hard stances on the New England Patriots. Ahead of you are two videos of the Tube Belonging To You variety — one taking the "for" and one taking the extreme "against." It's a toss up as ...
FedEx Wants All Hungover Employees At Work Tomorrow
Until those diligent slackers get the day after Super Bowl turned into a national holiday, we the working class must continue to roll into to work on Monday, somehow, some way. Don't bother calling in sick — it doesn't work....