it Page 1017 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ben Watson Gets Manchester City To Help Him With His Olímpico
Just a few days after Watford’s Ben Watson missed out on an Olímpico against Tottenham, he got his goal today (sort of) after bouncing it into Joe Hart’s goal off Aleksander Kolarov’s head. Watford lead 1-0 after an hour....

Australian Kid Takes On Entire Watermelon At Cricket Match, Loses
Sometimes in this life, we must take on challenges too big, bite off more than we can chew, and fail, to grow into bigger, more fully realized people. What follows is a short story about a young Australian cricket fan, a watermelon, and testing your limits....

Sputtering Florida Offense Manages Something Indescribable, Awesome
The Florida Gators were underwhelming offensively in 2015, and yet they managed to do something pretty neat today at the Citrus Bowl to tie Michigan up in the first quarter. We’re not even sure what to call this, but we like it....

Report: Baylor Settles With Former Student Sexually Assaulted By Football Player
In August, then-Baylor football player Sam Ukwuachu was found guilty of sexual assault and sentenced to 180 days in jail. And now the woman he was found guilty of assaulting, a former Baylor student, has settled with the university, the Dallas Morning News reported today....

Nobody Cares If You Lie
Will Leitch, senior writer at Sports On Earth, culture writer for Bloomberg Politics, contributing editor at New York magazine, film critic for The New Republic and founder of Deadspin, is doing his yearly fill-in for Drew Magary on today’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo. (Here is 2011’s ...

LeBron James Doesn't Owe You Shit
Thirteen months ago in Cleveland, Ohio, a 12-year-old black boy named Tamir Rice was playing with a BB gun in a park when he was ambushed by two Cleveland police officers who drove up to the gazebo where the boy was relaxing. One officer, Timothy Loehmann, shot Rice in the chest before their police ...

We're The Deadspin Staff; Let's Chat!
We’re also just “working” today for appearance’s sake, so let’s talk about whatever’s on your mind. ...

Disney Inundates <i>General Hospital</i> Episode With References To New Year's Eve College Football Playoff Games
ESPN says it isn’t worried about viewership for tomorrow’s college football playoff games on New Year’s Eve, but the degree to which TV viewers have been choked to death by promos for the two games—which were played on New Year’s Day last year—has left many never wanting to hear “Auld Lang Syne” eve...

Louisville's James Burgess Ejected 11 Seconds Into Music City Bowl For Targeting
Louisville senior linebacker James Burgess was ejected just 11 seconds into the final game of his career, after officials ruled this hit on Texas A&M receiver Damion Ratley constituted targeting. The NCAA rule book defines ejection-worthy targeting as:...

Donut-Stealing Raccoon Has Curious Donut Choices
Man, what are you doing? I understand that in a heist situation, speed is paramount, but the ‘ICY CHOCOLATE’ basket is right there. Why the shit would you choose an ‘ORANGE BAR’?...

The New Case Against Bill Cosby Is Mostly Based On Evidence Authorities Had All Along
Bill Cosby was charged yesterday with three counts of aggravated indecent assault by authorities in Montgomery County, Pa., for what happened back in 2004, when Andrea Constand said Cosby invited her over to his home, drugged, and assaulted her. At the time, Constand was the director of operations f...

David Moyes Sneaks Excuses For His Own Failure Into Comments Backing Louis van Gaal
When a team finds itself mired in a bog of bad results it can’t work its way out of, it’s perfectly common for illustrious figures from the club’s past to pop up offering words of support and encouragement to the current players and staff. What isn’t so common is a less-than-illustrious former manag...

You Know Who Should Run For President? George Pataki
I mean, if the guy could get elected governor of New York as a Republican, he could be a heckuva candi—...

2015: The Year In Cursing
2015 was a banner year for the world’s profanity practitioners, as motherfuckers with filthy mouths talked shit on TV, to referees, and to fans around the world. Here’s the best fucking curse words we highlighted on Deadspin’s pages in 2015:...

Bill Cosby Charged In 2004 Sexual-Assault Case Involving Temple Basketball Employee
Earlier today, prosecutors in Montgomery County, Pa. announced that they had filed felony charges against disgraced comedian Bill Cosby in relation to an accusation that in 2004, he drugged and sexually assaulted a woman in his home....

Peter King: "I Am Obviously A Rube"
He’s probably talking about the Chip Kelly firing, but may be talking about Skyline chili. Seems accurate either way....
![Eagles Fire Chip Kelly [Updated]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/okoyugeid3mznuvh7bzk.jpg)
Eagles Fire Chip Kelly [Updated]
The Philadelphia Eagles have “released” head coach Chip Kelly, according to a statement the team made tonight. The full statement reads:...

Lemmy Fucking Ruled
I don’t have anything all that insightful to say about Lemmy, who died tonight, or about Motörhead, the band he lorded over and which lorded over rock and roll longer than I’ve been alive, but they were god damn madmen and you should have loved them if you didn’t....
![Barcelona Cut New Player For Anti-Barça Tweets—Hours After Signing Him [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/kkwfjdxeflfblfbvd2tj.jpg)
Barcelona Cut New Player For Anti-Barça Tweets—Hours After Signing Him [Update]
The three young gents you see in the photo above are Sergi Guardiola, Moisés, and Xemi, all new Barcelona players whose signings were announced just a few hours ago. They were supposed to shore up the reserve team. “Supposed to” is the operative phrase there, since Guardiola—no relation to Pep—has a...

The Chiefs Should Terrify The AFC
The AFC’s elite teams are all limping toward the finish line. The Bengals are relying on a backup quarterback who’s most famous for having a girlfriend who aroused Brent Musberger, and you couldn’t describe the Broncos’ new starter as much else besides ‘Tall’ (and, I suppose, ‘Injured’ and maybe ‘Va...