it Page 1026 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Alex Ovechkin Is Best Russian Hockey Man
Alex Ovechkin now has the most goals scored in the NHL by a Russian-born player. His goal against the Dallas Stars Thursday night gave him 484 goals, surpassing Sergei Fedorov’s 483....
The Ultimate Jason "White Chocolate" Williams Highlight Reel Is Finally Here
There is no shortage of White Chocolate highlights on the internet, but this latest reel was put together by the NBA, meaning it’s full of high quality video and more than a few plays you’ve probably never seen before....
<i>Carol</i> Is A Beautiful Love Story, Starring A Terrific Cate Blanchett
In director Todd Haynes’ films, characters have to learn how to live in worlds that don’t suit them. In Safe, Far From Heaven and I’m Not There, his lonely protagonists often feel trapped by circumstance, unable to find any sort of real happiness because, deep down, no one around them sees things th...
<i>The Night Before </i>Is One Seth Rogen Bromance Too Many
A lot of comics have a shtick, and the trick is to give it enough flexibility so that it can be twisted and reshaped in myriad ways without breaking. Since Seth Rogen’s leading-man breakthrough in 2007’s Knocked Up, his has been impressively bendy, playing overgrown man-children who end up pulling t...
A Shitting Irish Setter, And More Of The Grossest Things You've Seen On Public Transit
Asking about the grossest thing you guys have ever seen on public transportation may have been a mistake, because I’ve been forced to read many a tale about public defecation and urination, among other bodily fluid-based adventures. If that tickles your fancy, then hang on for our readers’ tales of ...
The Jose Fernandez Trade Rumors Just Started And Reporters Are Fighting About Them
Oh yeah, it’s hot fucking stove season. The most interesting and most frighteningly plausible (given the franchise involved) blockbuster deal being bandied about would involve the Marlins trading away starter Jose Fernandez, an insanely talented 23-year-old under team control for the next three year...
This Dion Waiters Attempted Layup Is The Saddest Thing I've Ever Seen
Dion Waiters has been better this season, I swear. He’s shooting an astronomical 48% from three on 2.5 attempts per game, and his rebounding is up too. But he’s still Dion Waiters, and so we’re still treated to moments like this:...
Nobody Makes Dirk Nowitzki Bleed His Own Blood
Kelly Olynyk was frequently compared to Dirk Nowitzki coming out of college. Mostly because they’re both tall gangly white guys, but also because of some similarities in their games, especially the post moves that they employ....
<i>AP Stylebook</i> Declares Which College Teams Get To Go By Their Initials
I said this the last time I blogged about the Associated Press sports styles, and I’ll say it again: I find this stuff fascinating, and it’s my blog, so if you don’t like it you can just go right back to the toilet you came from....
This Guy Walked Around The World With $6,000 And A Violin, And Only Had His Nuts Grabbed Once
As I understand it, a Bulgarian farm worker grabbed Andrew Siess’s nuts with his left hand while holding a gun in his right hand. He wasn’t pointing the gun at Siess, mind you, just holding it. Siess pushed him away, but the Bulgarian guy—speaking the international language of aggression—again grabb...
Bobby Jindal, Obsequious Twerp, Simpers The Fuck Out
Bobby Jindal will no longer pursue the 2016 Republican presidential nomination. He also will not pursue Alpha Centauri, or growing a second head out of his left shoulder, or the Elder Wand. Dogs will not shoot lasers from their eyes. The sun will not be a showerhead that sprays grapefruit juice. Man...
Cris Carter, Lame Dad Who Doesn't Know What Dabbing Is, Defines Dabbing
Okay, so we’re now into the third day of talking about Cam Newton dabbin’ on dem folk and this morning on Mike and Mike, Mike Greenberg and Cris Carter discussed what dabbing is. Greenberg, a lame dad, wasn’t familiar with the dance, so he asked Carter. Carter, himself a lame dad, wasn’t familiar wi...
Evgeni Malkin's Beautiful Dangle Was Exactly What The Penguins Needed
Heading into last night, the Penguins were a respectable 10-7-0, but they weren’t scoring. Marc-Andre Fleury has been amazing, but the offense—headed by two of the best players in the world in Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin, and bolstered by the offseason addition of Phil Kessel—had been bloodless....
Towson University Women's Swimming And Diving Team Rocked By Locker Room Recording Scandal
Something extremely fishy is going on with the Towson University women’s swimming and diving team....
Reports: Aldon Smith Suspended For One Year
Raiders defensive end Aldon Smith will be suspended by the NFL for one calendar year, according to numerous reports. The suspension stems from Smith’s Aug. 6 arrest for DUI (his third DUI arrest and fifth overall), hit and run, and vandalism. That arrest was the straw that broke the camel’s back and...
Scared White People Are Running Out Of Reasons To Hate Cam Newton
On Sunday in Nashville, the Carolina Panthers beat the Tennessee Titans 27-10 and extended their record to a perfect 8-1. Panthers quarterback Cam Newton sealed the game late in the fourth when he took a snap from two yards out on third and goal, bullied his way to the right, and reached over four T...
You Can Totally Use Soap On A Cast-Iron Pan
My guest this week on the official Ask a Clean Person podcast is Daniel Gritzer, the culinary director at Serious Eats, who joined me to share the vast amount of knowledge he’s collected over the years about caring for cast-iron cookware. New, old, seasoned, unseasoned, rusted, you name it—Daniel ca...
LIU Brooklyn Tops Loyola On A Frenzied Buzzer-Beating Banked Three
LIU Brooklyn opened their season in exhilarating fashion Monday night, beating Loyola (Md.) in a game that saw a crazy final five seconds. With it all tied up 68-68, Loyola inbounded from under their own basket. They looked to have a good layup or dunk attempt, but Jerome Frink sent the shot packing...
Reminder From Russell Westbrook: Don't Get It Twisted
The Celtics beat up on the Durant-less Thunder last night, and Marcus Smart had a better game than opposing point guard Russell Westbrook. After the game, one reporter asked Westbrook if Smart, being a big, physical guard, is a particularly tough matchup for him. Westbrook did not take kindly to thi...