it Page 1146 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Soccer Player Scores, Celebrates, Falls Into Giant Hole In The Ground
Coritiba hosted São Paulo yesterday in Brazil's Série A, and Coritiba beat that ass, defeating São Paulo, 3-1, with Coritiba forward Joel scoring two goals. But that's not why we're here. We're hear to talk about what happened after Joel scored his second goal....
Bro Haughtily Tries To Exit Drinking Competition, Fails
Each year, the University College Dublin hosts an event known as Iron Stomach, in which a group of freshmen sit on a stage and are forced to eat and drink absurd amounts of gross things. The proceedings are nasty enough to necessitate a large trough—meant for collecting puke, spit, and whatever the ...
Vikings Want To Get The Adrian Peterson Situation Right, Or So They Say
After initially bungling the Adrian Peterson situation, Zygi Wilf and Vikings management really want to get it right. You can tell because they keep saying it over and over again....
A Good Police Guy
An NYPD cop would have cracked this fool's head open....
Family Futile: <em>This Is Where I Leave You</em>, Reviewed
This Is Where I Leave You feels like a social experiment in how much slack we're willing to cut a movie filled with actors we like. There's nothing particularly new or interesting in this umpteenth story about a family coming together after the death of one of their own, and yet the collective g...
15-Year-Old Russian Twins Busted For Doping Because Russia
Famous for its dash cams and terrifying lo-fi drugs, Russia now adds a new blemish to its resume: doping up its youth....
Reggie Bush Admits To "Harshly" Disciplining His 1-Year-Old Daughter [Update]
Lions running back Reggie Bush was a guest on the Boomer and Carton radio show yesterday, and he shared some extremely bad thoughts about Adrian Peterson and corporal punishment....
Korean Mayor Egged By Councilman For Relocating Baseball Stadium
What you see here, via our friends at MyKBO.net, is the mayor of Changwon, South Korea, Ahn Sang-soo, getting busted with an egg thrown by councilman Kim Sung-il. ...
Rejoice: Hallucinating, Cop-Punching Laxbro Lands New College Team
Last year, Charley Gargano had a bad trip. The former Marquette lacrosse player dropped acid, wandered around in his boxers and socks, and proceeded to punch a lady-cop in the face before being pepper-sprayed, arrested, and charged with a felony and assorted misdemeanors. ...
Angry Ukrainian Mob Throws Politician Into A Dumpster
An angry mob was waiting outside of Ukraine's parliament today, and they were not playing games. When they spotted Economic Development Party member Vitaly Zhuravsky leaving the building, they grabbed him and threw his ass right into a dumpster....
Kelly Slater Will Not Die
Kelly Slater surfed the elimination round today in the Hurley Pro at Trestles in California. Facing off against Jeremy Flores, who is 26, Slater lofted this monster air into the closeout, magically riding away and advancing into round three. ...
James Dolan And His Dopey Band Went On TV And Things Got Awkward
James Dolan went on Good Day New York this morning to talk about his corny-ass blues band and play multiple(!) songs in studio. He was on the show for so long, but the highlight of his appearance was when co-anchor Rosanna Scotto couldn't remember the name of Dolan's band while introducing them fo...
Royals Win On Wild Sprint-Off
Jarrod Dyson is fond of the maxim, "that's what speed do," which is an easy thing to say when you're as fast as Jarrod Dyson. But last night's thrilling come-from-behind win, in which two pinch-runners had their ways with the basepaths? That's what speed do....
Ryan Hall's Thirst For Running Slaked By Jack Daniels
America's former top marathoner Ryan Hall announced today he has taken on legendary coach Jack Daniels as a coach. Former coach God was unavailable for comment....
N.Y. Governor's Race Now About Who Roots For Which Crappy AFC East Team
New York state politics are the objective worst in the nation (tied for last with every other state). Example: this ad, paid for by the Erie County Democratic Party, which aired in the Buffalo area last week and blasted gubernatorial candidate Rob Astorino for being...a Dolphins fan....
Colin Kaepernick Was The Most Disastrous Quarterback In Week 2
Colin Kaepernick had an awful game Sunday night throwing three interceptions, fumbling once, and getting sacked four times. Sometimes, broad game stats can mask situational competence, but not here. According to data from Brian Burke of Advanced Football Analytics, Kaerpernick's interception at th...
Rutgers Apologizes For Fans' Penn State Signs And T-Shirts
Rutgers AD Julie Hermann released a statement of apology to any visiting Penn State fans who might've been offended by the conduct of some home fans at Rutgers's Big Ten debut on Saturday....
Chris Sale Does Not Have Bones In His Body, Defies Physics
Chicago White Sox ace Chris Sale is, on a per-inning basis, currently pitching more or less the way Sandy Koufax did in his prime. (His park- and league-adjusted ERA-plus of 195 is actually a little better than Koufax's best-ever mark, though yes of course Koufax pitched a hell of a lot more innings...
White ESPN Titans Reporter Has Qualms About Plies
Yesterday, before the Dallas Cowboys-Tennessee Titans game, the Titans reportedly had some portable speakers on the sideline during warmups. Through these speakers, they played rap music. Hold onto your hats, because it gets worse....