it Page 748 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Government Shutdown Has Turned Yosemite National Park Into A Congested, Poop-Filled Mess
After the federal government shut down on Dec. 21, National Parks Service workers were furloughed, but Yosemite National Park did not close. In fact, it is currently more open than ever, with the $35 park access fee waived and entrance booths bearing a “Pass On Thru” sign. People are indeed passing ...
Russell Westbrook Borrows Lance Stephenson's Air Guitar
Having a signature celebration opens Lance Stephenson up to humiliation. (Being Lance Stephenson, generally, also opens him up to humiliation.) Just before halftime in the Thunder’s win over the Lakers Wednesday night, Paul George stripped his former Pacers teammate, fought him off as he clamored to...
Perhaps It Is Not A Good Idea To Jump This High
One thing I think we can all agree on is that one of the most enjoyable things about watching basketball is seeing guys jump real high and do cool stuff while they are in the air. But what if, in fact, the jumping is bad?...
Your Favorite Baseball Team Can Afford Any Free Agent It Wants
The days are no longer getting shorter and darker, and began to bounce back in the right direction a few days before Christmas. There is still a lot of winter left, though, and given the way that the MLB offseason just kind of never got around to happening last year, it’s hard to know when things w...
Maybe A Troy Tulowitzki Signing Will Tide You Over While You Wait On Manny Machado
We’ve been preheating the damn oven for two months, but now that it’s 2019 perhaps we are finally entering the hot stove season we’ve been so rudely denied? The Yankees have signed a multi-time all-star, multi–gold glove winning shortstop!...just not that one....
Reports: Antonio Brown Missed Sunday's Game Because He Was Pissed Off, Not Hurt
Steelers all-pro wideout Antonio Brown missed his team’s crucial Week 17 game against the Bengals on Sunday, which was a must-win to keep Pittsburgh’s playoff hopes alive. On the preceding Thursday, the team’s injury report listed Brown as having a knee injury, but according to reports from around t...
Kiko Alonso's Failed Dirty Hit Leads To Brawl, Ejection
Most players on teams that have been eliminated from the playoffs are just trying to get through today without hurting themselves or others. Not Dolphins linebacker Kiko Alonso, who is out there trying (and failing) to maim Bills quarterback Josh Allen....
Matt Prater Earned All Seven Points With His First Career Passing Touchdown
Matt Prater, who holds the record for the longest field goal in NFL history, notched his first career passing touchdown during Sunday’s game against the Packers. Prater lined up to attempt a 26-yard field goal, which would have added to the Lions’ 7-0 lead over a DeShone Kizer-led Packer team. But b...
Report: Oh Dear God, The Titans Need Blaine Gabbert To Lead Them To The Playoffs
Here’s a report from ESPN’s Chris Mortensen that threatens to suck all the juice out of tonight’s matchup between the Colts and the Titans, the winner of which will advance to the playoffs while the loser goes home to cry. According to Mortensen, Titans starting quarterback Marcus Mariota is unlikel...
Dallas Stars CEO Takes A Heaping Dump On His Team's Most Prominent Players
The Dallas Stars are currently eighth in the NHL’s Western Conference, and are narrowly holding onto the second Wild Card spot. But they’re just 4–8 over their last 12 games, and stars Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin are ranked 57th and 67th in the league in scoring, respectively. Apparently, disappoint...
Nevada Coach Jay Norvell Hath Donned The Blue Shirt Of Inspiration
In general, football head coaches are pretty much the dullest, weirdest, most wooden-brained group of men on earth, just a bunch of sweaty cosplaying doofuses blindly guessing at how to do their ridiculous job and what it even means to be good at that job, which probably isn’t really one job at all ...
Ben Simmons Keeps Dunking On Jazz Fans Over His Rookie Of The Year Win
Ben Simmons might not be able to shoot basketballs into hoops with any sort of consistency, but the Sixers point guard can still make life a living hell for his opponents. Just ask the hostile Utah crowd that attended Thursday night’s Sixers-Jazz game, which spent the majority of the game booing Sim...
Steelers Coordinator Says His Defense Will Have "A Problem" Covering A Guy Who's Been On Injured Reserve For Three Months
The Steelers are in a tough spot. Their late-season swoon has put them in the unfortunate position of needing a win from the dreaded Browns in order to have a chance at claiming the AFC North and advancing to the playoffs, when it has been literal decades since anyone has been able to rely on the Br...
A Transformer Exploded In New York And The Videos Rule Extremely Hard
I am told this spectacular light show over New York City tonight was caused by a transformer explosion at a power station in Queens, and not by a massive meteor burning up in the atmosphere, nor by slimy space aliens parking their city-sized mothership over the city and preparing the invasion. One t...
Won't Someone Please Think Of Dana White?
UFC president Dana White was a bit of a shithead towards a reporter on Thursday during the press conference for the recently-relocated UFC 232. To make things easier for Jon Jones to participate in the headlining fight after an “atypical” drug test, the pay-per-view event was move from Las Vegas to ...
The Strange Career Of Jeff Monson, American MMA Fighter Turned Russian Politician
On September 9, 2018, American mixed martial arts fighter Jeff Monson became a government official in the Russian Federation. The former UFC title challenger, who was granted Russian citizenship by President Vladimir Putin less than four months earlier, was elected to a council of deputies in the ci...
You Can Only Grieve So Much<em></em>
Will Leitch, contributing editor at New York magazine, national correspondent for MLB.com, film critic for Grierson & Leitch, host of Sports Illustrated’s “The Will Leitch Show” and founder of Deadspin, is doing his yearly fill-in for Drew Magary on today’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo...
Fuck Digital Tickets
Earlier this year, I decided to garner a boatload of daughter points all at once to make up for the fact that I moved 1,300 miles away from home. My dad came to visit me for Father’s Day, so I got us tickets to see the Baltimore Orioles play at Camden Yards. We both love baseball, and this would be ...
Surprise! Paul Pogba Is Still Really Damn Good
Following a half-season of angry training videos, notable benchings, and frothing tension, Paul Pogba wants you to remember that he can still do shit like this: ...
Matt Patricia Is Always Late
Bill Belichick’s gnarled, stunted coaching tree—a coaching krummholz, really—ultimately reflects well on Belichick. He’s not, apparently, succeeding solely by surrounding himself with hypertalented assistants, as we’re seeing every few years when one of those assistants gets a head coaching gig and ...