it Page 843 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Chiefs Are Flailing
The Chiefs have posted a winning record in all four seasons with quarterback Alex Smith and head coach Andy Reid, but they’ve only won one playoff game. Last summer, there was some talk of giving first-round draft pick QB Patrick Mahomes II a shot instead of Smith. Mahomes, a Big 12 gunslinger, was ...
Is Alex Ovechkin DUN DUN DUN ... A Russian Agent?
Seeking to explain why Alex Ovechkin started the PutinTeam “social movement” earlier in the fall, a trio of Washington Post reporters went long on the Ovechkin-Putin bromance, and the genesis of Ovechkin’s PutinTeam launch. It’s a sprawling piece of work that explores both the origins and the effect...
Clutch Time Appears To No Longer Be Westbrook Time
Remember last season, when Russell Westbrook was an incredible monster, and his clutch performance was the stuff of legend? Remember how the Thunder outperformed their point differential by dominating those clutch situations? Remember how they went a shocking 26-16 in games that were within five poi...
Miami's Return To Greatness Stalls With Upset Loss To Pitt
“The ‘Canes are back, baby!” many an optimistic Miami fan has hollered this season, unchastened by the countless times over the years they’ve chanted this refrain without it actually coming true, and unconcerned about the fact that few non-Floridians under the age of 30 have any first-hand knowledge...
Marouane Fellaini And New Balance Headed To Court Over Allegedly Shitty Cleats
Marouane Fellaini is suing New Balance for £2 million in damages after the shoe brand prematurely terminated his contract, which the company said it did because Fellaini wore the shoes without the logo, which Fellaini said he did because the shoes were pieces of crap that hurt his feet, and the logo...
Nick Fitzgerald Leaves Egg Bowl With Horrible, Horrible, Horrible Injury
Tonight’s Egg Bowl between Ole Miss and Mississippi State started off ugly and got literally ugly as Bulldogs quarterback Nick Fitzgerald left the game on a cart after suffering a truly horrifying leg injury that left ESPN’s broadcast scrambling to cut away. ...
All Losers Brackets Should Be Called Repechages
What do you call the part of a double-elimination tournament where the losers go after their first loss? There is a reasonable case for “loser’s bracket,” “losers bracket,” and “losers’ bracket.” Let’s give loser’s bracket two losses; this isn’t the bracket of one loser. Losers’ bracket might be str...
Report: Atlanta Braves Lose 12 Prospects After Paying Them Too Much
Major League Baseball has decided that the Atlanta Braves will forfeit 12 prospects as part of their punishment for circumventing rules regarding the limits on what teams can spend to sign international prospects, according to Jeff Passan of Yahoo. Most notable among the lost players—who will immedi...
Michael Porter Jr.'s Freshman Season Is Over After Two Minutes Of Play
Michael Porter Jr. will likely be one of the first five players taken in the 2018 NBA Draft. The general consensus pegs him as one of the elite prospects available next year, although unlike Marvin Bagley III, DeAndre Ayton, Mohamed Bamba, and Luka Doncic, Porter will have practically no experience ...
Teenage Giant Bol Bol Commits To Oregon
Because of his beloved famous father, Manute, and his own similarly pronounced height, Bol Bol has been on the national radar since he was a 6-foot-5 middle schooler, casually blocking the shots of normal pubescent boys. Now, the now 7-foot-1 high school senior has chosen to commit to the University...
Joel Embiid Has Perfected Shit-Talking
Joel Embiid didn’t have the kind of monster game we’ve grown accustomed to seeing during last night’s win over the Jazz—his 15 points and 11 rebounds were perfectly solid—but he did provide the highlight of the game....
Bill Belichick: Thank God We Made It Out Of Mexico City Without Any Earthquakes Or Volcano Eruptions
Bill Belichick wasn’t so thrilled about the Patriots’ game last weekend in Mexico City, which is fair enough—at an altitude of nearly 7,500 feet (more than 2,000 feet higher than Denver), playing in Mexico City can present some unique challenges. Fine! But rather than sticking to that point in a rad...
USF Football Player Charged With Felony Sexual Battery
A wide receiver with the South Florida Bulls has been arrested and charged with one count of felony sexual battery on a woman over the age of 18. Kevaughn Dingle, 18, was arrested on Friday and released from jail on bond the next day. Coach Charlie Strong said today that Dingle is suspended from the...
Let's Remember A Cat
It is with great sadness that I inform you of the death of Skeeter Duffy, baseball’s most notable fat cat and one of its best. Matt Duffy—presently in the Rays’ organization and previously the Giants’ third baseman—announced the passing of his beloved fatso due to illness this weekend at the age of ...
Zolani Tete Scores Fastest Title Fight Knockout In Boxing History
South African bantamweight Zolani Tete has always had serious knockout power. He started his pro career off with seven straight knockouts, and now he holds the all-time record for fastest KO in a major title fight. ...
Australian MP's Brain Goes On Short, Strange Journey
Australia has been recently gripped by a heated debate over whether same-sex couples should be allowed to marry. Last week, the majority of Australians voted to legalize same-sex marriage, which apparently caused MP Bob Katter, who had previously opposed the legalization of gay marriage, to soften h...
Country Musician Releases Bad Song About Telling His Ass To Take A Knee
Country musician Neal McCoy was so incensed by NFL players who took a knee during that national anthem that he performed a song called “Take A Knee My Ass.” It is a truly shameless cash grab and a lousy, maudlin song; it begins with him singing the first portion of the Pledge of Allegiance....
U.S. Navy Is Very Sorry That Their Pilot Drew A Dong In The Sky
If you have been wandering around Washington state’s Okanogan County lately and thinking, wait, do I see a giant dick drawn in the sky? your eyes have not deceived you. And the United States Navy, specifically the naval air station at Whidbey Island, is very sorry about that. ...
South Carolina Women's Basketball Team Declines White House Invite To "Focus On The Season Ahead"
The South Carolina women’s basketball team, last season’s champions, have declined an invitation to visit the White House tomorrow due to what coach Dawn Staley described as a scheduling conflict and a desire to focus on their current play:...