it Page 890 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Capitals Winger Tom Wilson Made The Save Of The Night
The Washington Capitals’ Tom Wilson isn’t a goalie, but he came up with the best save of the night in tonight’s crucial Game 4 against the Toronto Maple Leafs. About halfway through the first period, Wilson made a diving save to whisk the puck, which had slipped through Braden Holtby’s pads, off the...
White Sox Witness Large Man's Large Dong<em></em>
Big New York Yankees outfielder Aaron Judge made great use of an ill-advised Dylan Covey pitch, launching an intercontinental home run 448 feet into the night off the Rule 5 pick, who was making his second major-league start....
Ichiro Socks First-Pitch Home Run In What Might Be His Final At-Bat In Seattle
Ichiro and the Miami Marlins wrapped up a three-game series up in Seattle this afternoon, losing two of the three games to the Mariners. The last time the Marlins came to Seattle, they played as the “home team” due to a confounding U2-related scheduling conflict at their old ballpark in Miami that f...
Shaq's Large Teenage Son Will Play College Ball At Arizona
Last we heard from Shareef O’Neal, he was dunking over his father, Kazaam star Shaquille O’Neal. Shareef is a five-star power forward listed at 6-foot-8 and he’ll almost certainly grow some more, as he’s just a high school junior....
See If You Can Spot The Difference Between These Photos
This idea is shamelessly stolen from the Times’ sports desk....
What It’s Like To Announce A Tennis Match That's Been Interrupted By Loud Sex Noises
Mike Cation heard a moan, and figured it was just two people in the stands talking loudly. The tennis announcer, working the USTA Pro Circuit’s Sarasota Open on Tuesday, looked at the crowd and saw everyone looking around. Then it became clear: This wasn’t two people talking. This was two people fuc...
I Just Love This Juicero Story So Much
Of all the amazing sentences and couplets and paragraphs in this wonderful Bloomberg story about the troubles of a juice and juice-press technology company called Juicero Inc., I think the following is my favorite:...
Rob Gronkowski Crashes White House Press Briefing
Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski, a man perfectly engineered to survive a frat party balcony collapse, is at the White House today with his Patriots teammates so that they can be honored for their Super Bowl victory. Gronk, perhaps having been set free to wander the halls, crashed White House press...
White Sox Player Appears On Television
With the Chicago White Sox in New York to play the Yankees this week, José Quintana made an appearance on The Tonight Show. He credits regularly watching the show with helping him learn English, and took the opportunity to pay back host Jimmy Fallon by helping him learn some Spanish....
Barron Trump Is A Gooner
At this point, the only foreign policy position I’m interested in hearing from the White House is whether Barron is or is not #WengerOut....
Citing Family Reasons, Tom Brady Will Not Attend Patriots' White House Ceremony
Later today, the New England Patriots will celebrate their championship at the White House in a ceremony led by Donald Trump. A handful of players have already announced their intentions to skip the visit, some offering no public explanation, and other making it quite clear that it’s about politics....
Aaron Hernandez Dead Of Apparent Suicide
Former Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez was found dead in his prison cell early Wednesday morning in Shirley, Mass. In a statement, the Massachusetts Department of Correction labeled his death a suicide by hanging....
Sex Noises Briefly Derail Tennis Match In Florida
A tennis match today between Frances Tiafoe and Mitchell Krueger at the Sarasota Open was temporarily interrupted by the sounds of some fucking....
Baylor Hires Linda Livingstone As Its President
Baylor University has hired Linda Livingstone as its first woman president, the school announced today. The move comes amid several lawsuits against the university over its mishandling of sexual assault cases on campus, which included downplaying women’s allegations, failing to properly report accus...
Patriots Fan's Heat Check Goes Wrong
Sound the Twitter drama foghorn, because you’re about to read about something incredibly stupid and meaningless....
The Pirates' Pitcher-Whisperer Has Done It Again With Ivan Nova<em></em>
Ivan Nova is 1-2 so far in 2017. But look closer: In 20 innings pitched with a 2.25 ERA, he’s struck out eight and walked none. Or put another way, after Monday night’s complete-game 2-1 loss to St. Louis:...
Starling Marte Suspended 80 Games After Positive PED Test
All-Star Pirates outfielder Starling Marte has tested positive for the banned steroid Nandrolone and will be suspended for 80 games. Jon Heyman first reported the news and MLB confirmed shortly after....
The Dynasty That Ate Itself
It was a year of mourning for the Red Wings. Their beloved owner, Mike Ilitch, died. So did Joe Louis Arena, the old barn on the Detroit River where the Wings dominated in the mid-to-late ‘90s and early aughts, winning four Stanley Cups, six Presidents’ Trophies, and making the playoffs for 25 conse...
Capitals Fans: Ohfuckohshitfuckfuckfuck
Capitals fans: Now that you’re down a game to the eighth-seeded Leafs, in a series that was just supposed to be a warm-up for the real opportunities to choke, how’re those sphincters? Are they so desperately clenched that not even a molecule can pass through, giving you that familiar tummy ache of d...