it Page 895 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Desperate NFL Puts Shitty Thursday Night Games On Website Belonging To <i>Washington Post</i> Owner
Thursday Night Football, which features tired NFL teams playing in ugly jerseys, tried out an experiment last season and streamed 10 of its games on Twitter. I tried watching once and promptly saw Twitter’s wonderful “social” integration alert me that someone had scored a touchdown before I saw anyt...
High School Pole Vaulter Annihilates Pro Field, Breaks A Bunch Of Records
Mondo Duplantis is not only the best-named high school athlete in the country, he’s also one of the best. Last weekend, Duplantis was competing in pole vault at the Texas Relays in the men’s elite division. Duplantis is a junior at Lafayette High School in Louisiana, yet he smoked a field that conta...
Stoke's Charlie Adam Tried To Take A Corner And Failed So Hard
Early in the second half of Stoke City’s match against Burnley, the Potters’ Charlie Adam stepped up to take a corner and ... it did not go well....
Everton Score Stupid Goal, Manchester United Get Late Penalty, Both Go Home Unhappy
Today’s Manchester United-Everton game could’ve been a big deal to either team. If Everton won, they would’ve leapt over Arsenal and United to take the fifth spot in the table, just five points behind Man City in fourth; while they still would’ve had basically no realistic shot of finishing in the t...
Adorable Beagle Declares Self Lord Of The Soccer Pitch, All Must Swear Allegiance
Those clowns at The Guardian put a video on YouTube that shows a very good beagle running onto the field during a Northern Premier League match and interrupting the action for over seven minutes. The creator of the video, perhaps believing nobody wants to watch a dog prance around a soccer field for...
Georgia's Useless Title IX Bill Didn't Pass This Year But Could Return In 2018
Georgia House Bill 51, also known as the “campus rape bill,” didn’t pass the state legislature this year, but that doesn’t mean the proposal is dead. According to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution this is, “the first of a two-year legislative session, anything that didn’t pass this week is still aliv...
This Is What Happens When Your Home Opener Gets Rescheduled<em></em>
Dozens of fans packed the White Sox stadium Tuesday to watch their team’s season opener against the Detroit Tigers, their division rivals. ...
Trump Conspiracy Tweetstorms Are The Infowars Of The Left
The fastest-growing career in America is not, as the Bureau of Labor Statistics would have you believe, in installing and repairing wind turbines. The fastest-growing career is doing 63 tweets in a row about why Donald Trump is a Manchurian president....
WADA And The IOC Will Do Whatever They Please With Positive Tests<em></em>
A report from German broadcast network ARD—which previously broadcast bombshells about FIFA corruption in Qatar and unpunished doping activity—claims that the IOC covered up doping cases from the 2008 Beijing Olympics. German journalist Hajo Seppelt reports that “in 2016 during the re-analysis for b...
White Sox Fail To Play Opening Day Game
The Chicago White Sox, who were set to send ace pitcher José Quintana to the mound against the Detroit Tigers and their ace pitcher Justin Verlander today, failed to play, as the game was rained out....
I'm So Glad Gonzaga Fouled With A Three-Point Lead
Thank you, Gonzaga. It was as if you read my angst-riddled mind on Saturday night....
Here's Arsène Wenger Physically Embodying The Despair Of Arsenal's Season
Watch this video of an anguished Arsène Wenger as he looks upon his charges while they conspire to throw away the work they’d done just moments earlier to get back on level terms with Manchester City. Wenger sees Mesut Özil cough the ball up, watches City carve up Arsenal’s back line with ease, and ...
The Detroit Tigers Will Offer You Aging Stars And A Terrible Bullpen
This is part of an occasional series comprising MLB season previews....
TV Viewer Snitches On Lexi Thompson, Costs Her A Major
It should’ve been a runaway victory for Lexi Thompson, and it would’ve been if not for one tattletale viewer and some truly unfair rules. Thompson had a significant lead in the final round of the ANA Inspiration, the first LPGA major of the year, when a viewer wrote in to alert officials to a violat...
Madison Bumgarner Hasn't Changed At All, Hits Dinger (UPDATE: Another Dinger!)
In the first four innings today, Madison Bumgarner was perfect—12 batters up, 12 batters down, five strikeouts. In the fifth inning today, he was perfect in a different sense—smashing a dinger....
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Diminutive Tennis Player's Entertaining Hot Streak Ends With ACL Tear<em></em>
If you were to flesh out the cohort of the next generation of tennis, the first few picks would be easy: Nick Kyrgios and Alexander Zverev are the sure shots; Dominic Thiem and Lucas Pouille are a little older but have got to be in the mix; and from the U.S. there’s Jack Sock and hopefully Frances ...
The Pittsburgh Pirates Will Be Frustratingly Competent
This is part of an occasional series comprising MLB season previews....
José Quintana Still On White Sox
Ace pitcher José Quintana, still a member of the Chicago White Sox, is scheduled to pitch Monday’s home opener against the Detroit Tigers. ...