it Page 954 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Naturally Gifted Striker Sets Up Amazing Goal
Thanks to some poor camera work, the video above doesn’t totally encapsulate the flat-out non-human feat of athleticism that created Thamesmead Town’s crazy-looking goal in the F.A. Cup....
This Tiger Just Wants To Fuck
The Smithsonian National Zoo has brought in Sparky, the Sumatran tiger you see above, for the sole purpose of sexing up “proven breeder” Damai (also a tiger)....
Kobe Bryant Is All About That $700 Juicer
Kobe Bryant rang in the New York Stock Exchange yesterday and unveiled his new career: heading up a $100 million venture capital fund. Along with Jeff Stibel—a former Web.com CEO—the creatively named Bryant Stibel will invest in “technology, media and data companies.” Apparently, the fund will succe...
Welcome To Mike Pence's Living Hell
Mike Pence, who will be spending the next three months paying for the grievous sins of a past life and also probably this one, forced his mother to hold a piece of chicken on a plane yesterday evening....
Little League Coach Makes Mound Visit To Tell His Son He Loves Him
The Little League World Series is good for three things: Feeling good for the happy children who win, feeling bad for the sad children who lose, and the occasional dose of good dadding....
MLB Owns Darren Rovell Online For Posting Erroneous Picture
Darren Rovell—a living, breathing blazer from Northwestern’s business school—is fond of tweeting out pictures. Sometimes, it’s a cake that’s shaped like a shoe, and usually it’s a piece of truly fucked up junk food from a stadium. Tonight, he posted a very well-composed picture of the Chicago White ...
High School Athlete Charged With Sexually Assaulting Two Unconscious Women Gets Probation<em></em>
In April, East Longmeadow High School senior David Becker was charged with sexually assaulting two of his classmates at a party while they were unconscious. Prosecutors recommended that the three-sport athlete be found guilty, MassLive.com reported, on two counts of indecent assault and battery. The...
Chiefs Fans Viciously Brawl, Ignore Security At Rams Game
The Rams have only hosted two football games so far during their brief tenure in Los Angeles, but both of them have featured big fights in the bleachers. Last week, rival groups of Rams fans commemorated the first Rams game in L.A. by punching the shit out of each other. On Saturday, this Chiefs fan...
Leave The Cincinnati Zoo's Twitter Account Alone
The director of the Cincinnati Zoo, home of the dead gorilla Harambe, has made a plea to internet funnypeople to give it a rest already:...
Trump Stooge On CNN: Hillary Clinton! Football! CTE? Just Saying ...
A Donald Trump supporter was invited on CNN this morning to yell about whatever it is Donald Trump supporters are yelling about these days. The Great Big Wheel Of Inane Bullshit happened to land on HILLARY CLINTON IS SICK AND FEEBLE, which led this anonymous Trump goon down a line of argument that e...
Carmelo Anthony Gets Emotional After Winning Third Gold Medal
As expected, the U.S. men’s basketball team crushed Serbia to win its third straight gold medal today, and Carmelo Anthony—playing in this fourth Olympics—became the first man in history to win three basketball golds. His post-game interview with NBC’s Ros Gold-Onwude was an emotional one, bringing ...
Roger Goodell Should Interview James Harrison In Public
More than anything, Roger Goodell fancies himself a disciplinarian. He’s personally taken the lead in prosecuting Ballghazi, gone out of his way to make an example of marijuana users, and gone all-out at Marshawn Lynch for the crime of having fun. Of course, Goodell also helped the Patriots cover up...
The Secret To Convincing Your Significant Other To Let You Play Video Games Whenever You Want
So you’ve found the love of your life. The two of you somehow tolerate one another enough that you’ve decided to share a home. Now you’ve got a problem: How do you convince them to let you get away with all those eight-hour binges on The Witcher 3?...
![Race Walk Leader Appears To Be Having Poop Problems [Updates: He Has Collapsed]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/u7sflo2jmani6kwj44yk.gif)
Race Walk Leader Appears To Be Having Poop Problems [Updates: He Has Collapsed]
French race walker Yohann Diniz is leading today’s 50k, but his competition hasn’t been a, uh, cakewalk? It looks like Diniz either has severe gastrointestinal issues—at times shoving a sponge down his pants to soak up wet fecal matter, and then throwing the sponge off toward the crowd—or stuck a bu...
Adam Eaton Hits A Grand Slam While Blowing A Bubble
Last night, Adam Eaton hit a ninth-inning grand slam to send the White Sox home with a 10-7 win over the Indians. And he did it while blowing a bubble, which seems a little dangerous but adds unexpected flair to baseball’s most magical outcome. After the game, Eaton told reporters he “was so fluster...
What Will Your Last Tweet Be?
There was an episode of Oprah that aired a long, long time ago that was about the survivors of terrible accidents. At least, I think that’s what it was about. It aired around the time of the Singapore Airlines flight 006 tragedy back in 2000, where a 747 aircraft didn’t manage to lift off before cra...
Wayde Van Niekerk's Run Was Historic In At Least Four Ways
South African Wayde van Niekerk’s Olympic gold medal and beautiful world record in the 400 meters could hardly get any sweeter. Out of lane eight—few win out of lane eight, much less set a world record, because other competitors are behind the lane eight runner until they hit the last straight, when...
Report: British Olympian Robbed At Gunpoint In Rio
According to a report from The Guardian, a member of Britain’s Olympic team was robbed at gunpoint early Tuesday morning. The report doesn’t have many details from the incident, such as who it was or where the robbery took place, just that it happened while the victim was “enjoying a night on the to...
![Brazilian Authorities Pull Two US Swimmers Off Flight Out Of Rio [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/dfoih3qhvmiijhuvy6ze.jpg)
Brazilian Authorities Pull Two US Swimmers Off Flight Out Of Rio [Update]
This whole story about US swimmers Ryan Lochte, Gunnar Bentz, Jack Conger, and Jimmy Feigen maybe or maybe not getting robbed at gunpoint by men who were maybe posing as Brazilian police officers is fishy and riddled with inconsistencies. Brazilian police cast doubt on Lochte’s story, and earlier to...