ja Page 333 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
LeBronWatch: LeBron Definitely Headed To The Lakers, Take It To The Bank
NBA free agency doesn’t kick off until July 1, but the period between now and then will be an often-unbearable crescendo of rumormongering and conjecture and tasseography, most of it having to do with the eventual destination of LeBron James. LeBron made it clear at his post–Game 4 press conference ...
CM Punk's Second UFC Fight Was A Bizarre Joke
Until he stepped into the octagon, CM Punk was having a great week. His three-year legal battle against former WWE physician Dr. Chris Amann had finally ended with a Cook County court ruling in his favor. Punk no longer has a potential $8 million decision hanging over him, and he can focus on his ne...
Mat Latos Sparked A Wild Can-Am League Brawl
Former MLBer Mat Latos hasn’t pitched in the bigs since getting released by the Blue Jays in May of last year. He’s now with the New Jersey Jackals of the independent Can-Am league, and on Saturday he was right in the middle of a bench-clearing brawl. That’s Latos in the GIF above, hoisting an oppon...
Oh No, Vlad Jr.'s Injury Timeline Is Expanding
The Blue Jays put gentle dinger machine Vladimir Guerrero Jr. on the 7-day disabled list last weekend after he tweaked a leg injury on a dipshit single on Saturday. It was a tough blow, but we are grownups, and we can survive seven days without our strong dong-mashing idol. It has now been seven day...
The Sound When These Two Men Smash Their Dicks And Balls Together Will Stay With You Long Into The Night
This happened in the seventh inning of Saturday’s Mariners-Rays game, with a runner on first and the Rays holding a 6-3 lead. It was a clutch, inning-ending grab, but it came with great, great sacrifice:...
USC Wins National Championship On Wild 4x400 Comeback As Announcers Declare Them Dead
Coming into the 4x400 meter relay at tonight’s NCAA track and field championships, the USC women had to win to clinch a national title; otherwise, Georgia would win and pull off a rare sweep of the men’s and women’s titles. When USC mangled the handoff on the final exchange (about 2:48 into the vide...
A Good Idea For Getting LeBron James Onto The Celtics
The Boston Celtics showed up, somewhat unexpectedly, on a list Stephen A. Smith made of teams “in the mix” to land LeBron James in free agency this summer (Smith is a dingus, but he was ahead of everyone on LeBron going to Miami in 2010, so his list can’t be summarily dismissed). The Celtics weren’t...
LeBron Busted His Hand In A Rage After That Game 1 Meltdown
I am certainly not going to pretend to believe this might’ve significantly changed the trajectory of the series, but it’s also not nothing: LeBron James reportedly played the last three games of the Finals with a busted-up hand after he punched a black board following Cleveland’s world-historic bone...
The Cavs Made The Right Adjustment
It was the third quarter, and the Warriors, already ahead on the scoreboard and up 3-0 in the series, were doing their third-quarter thing. That is to say, they’d decided to apply the 12 minutes of focused full-bore effort it takes to render them effectively invincible. A game they’d led steadily pr...
Rai Benjamin Runs 47.02 400m Hurdles, Tied For Second-Fastest In Human History
USC’s Rai Benjamin claimed the national championship in the 400 meter hurdles today in a mind-blowing 47.02, tying Edwin Moses’s former world record for the second-fastest time in human history in the event....
They Already Said They Weren't Going To Go, Man
Even though LeBron James and Steph Curry had already said that neither of their teams would visit the White House if they won the NBA Finals, today Donald Trump tried to pretend like he wouldn’t have invited them anyway. Surely the basketball players will regret the opportunity to watch a septuagena...
Report: Police Officer Who Tackled James Blake Didn't Even Receive The Full Recommended Punishment
In September 2015 an NYPD officer tackled and handcuffed James Blake outside a Manhattan hotel, mistaking the former American tennis player for a suspect in a credit card scam; a month later, an independent panel ruled that police used excessive force in the arrest. That panel, the Civilian Complain...
Universe Snuffs Last Remaining Spark Of Joy, Sends Vlad Jr. To The Disabled List
In an absolute bullcrap turn of events, dear sweet masher Vladimir Guerrero Jr. was sent to the disabled list Thursday with an injured leg. Per the Toronto Sun:...
Kevin Durant Is A Recurring Nightmare
The bad dream that’s afflicting LeBron James is a long one, replete with horrors. J.R. Smith is there, wandering around with a lit M-80 in his hand. Jordan Clarkson is somehow lurking around every corner, wearing Kobe Bryant’s face as a mask. Kevin Love’s drowning in a glass water tank and LeBron ca...
Kevin Durant Won The NBA Finals Tonight
Even if everyone already knew the Warriors were eventually going to win the NBA Finals regardless of what happened tonight, Game 3 was actually pretty fun. The Cavs gave the Dubs their best shot on the way to a respectable 110-102 defeat. Kevin Love came to play, Rodney Hood reminded us that he was ...
Hue Jackson Tries To Motivate Browns By Inadvertently Making Their Helmets Look Cooler
Anyone paying attention to Browns training camp—so, nobody beyond a group of irascible, underpaid beat writers—may have noticed that the players’ equipment looks a little different. The brown and white stripes that go across the middle of the helmet are missing. In a surprising deviation from everyt...
Javy Baez Ruins Sweatshirt, Also Gets An Out
In the ninth inning of an otherwise pretty blah Cubs loss, Chicago shortstop Javier Baez made a daredevil catch along the Steve Bartman wall at Wrigley Field. The out came at the cost of a Cubs fan’s beer and his previously clean sweatshirt, but it was a worthy sacrifice for an acrobatic play....
LeBron James Has Always Had To Carry Useless Weaklings
As we wait out the formality that these lopsided, nightmarish NBA Finals have become, it’s still worth acknowledging just how impressive it is that LeBron James has carried such a messed up, broken Cavs team through the Eastern Conference. With a supporting cast of old three-point specialists, activ...
Fire Mark Jackson<em></em>
Oh, hello again. Yes, I have returned from my book-writing sabbatical—venturing to the Yukon, wrestling wild salmon, scribbling long paragraphs about the FATE OF MAN on the back of aged moosehide—and am ready to rejoin you, my dearest online friends, once more. I feel refreshed and revigored, if suc...
LeBron James And Steph Curry Say Neither NBA Finals Team Will Visit The White House
An impossibly stupid saga is raging in the NFL, and the NBA has already offered a response via its two biggest stars: Neither Finals team will visit the White House. LeBron James made that clear today in a press conference:...