ja Page 622 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
LeBron Plays Basketball Poorly; City of Cleveland Placed On Suicide Watch
The Cleveland Cavaliers were absolutely pasted tonight, at home, by the old and previously-thought-to-be-decrepit Celtics. LeBron James was not much help. It's big "Uh Oh" time in Northeastern Ohio....
Lebron Makes Live-Action Mega Man Movie
Sure, it's a filmmaker named Eddie Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Comics Alliance]...
Lebron Once Gunned Down Five Members Of Congress
Sure, it was a Puerto Rican independence activist named Lolita Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [The Hill]...
Lebron Attends Prom In Duct Tape Tux
Sure, it's an Ohio high schooler named Louie Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Youngstown News]...
Lebron Arrested For Impersonating An Officer
Sure, it's a Chicago man named David Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Sun-Times]...
Lebron Vows To Save New York
Sure, it's a former Albany mayoral candidate-turned-deputy commissioner at the State Liquor Authority named Nathan Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Times Union]...
Washed-Up Coach Reduced To Shamelessly Peddling Crap On Twitter
Judging by his Twitter account, Florida Atlantic's Mike Jarvis is now a celebrity spokesman for something called the EnergyCare Dream Pillow, which apparently worked so well for Jarvis that he slept through an entire basketball season. [@coachmikejarvis]...
World Leaders Force Jays To Play Home Dates In Philly
MLB has moved the scheduled Blue Jays/Phillies series out of Toronto to avoid conflicting with the G20 summit. Jays fans are, shall we say, royally pissed....
Boston Mayor Needs A Refresher Course On Boston Sports
Confused Mayor Thomas Menino reminiscences about some of Beantown's "ionic" sports moments: "Havlicek stole the ball, Fisk waiving the ball fair, Flutie launching the Hail Mary pass, Varitek splitting the uprights." No mention of Antoine Walker's bloody shoulder pads? [Globe]...
Cavs' Offer To LeBron Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cleveland's chances at keeping LeBron, which, thanks to three blowout conference semifinals, are looking slightly brighter this morning....
Last Night's Winner: JaMarcus Russell's Adipose Tissue
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the 300-some pounds JaMarcus Russell was said to be carrying, and which the newly released quarterback will now be carrying out of Oakland....
The Freak-Out Over LeBron's Elbow Begins Now
Ball in Europe, citing a source close to the Cavs: "Apparently, the damage is enough that the right arm of King James ... is having great difficulty in carrying anything heavier than a basketball." The hopes of a city, for instance. [BallinEurope.com]...
The "Andrei Kirilenko's Yearly Free Pass Watch" Reaches DEFCON-2
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Don Cherry Has No Time For Your Emails, Opinions
The besuited one lost his shit this weekend over Hockey Night In Canada reading fan emails blasting Jaroslav Halak. We're unsure if this is because the criticisms are unwarranted, or if he just thinks email is dark sorcery....
Jaguars Mouthpiece Thinks One Christian Is As Good As The Next
Don't worry, Jags fans: while Tyson Alualu may not be Tim Tebow, the Florida Times-Union would like you to know that he's just as religious! Will you buy our season tickets now?...
Runaway Democracy Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the seven media members who didn't vote for Lebron James as MVP, showing that you (sort of) can't spell insufferable without "suffrage."...
Not Invited To The Bachelor Party For One William F. Leitch: Jay Mariotti
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
First Career Home Run Goes Right Through Dad's Car Window
Shane Trevino got a rare trifecta: he hit his first high school home run, probably got his father fired, and made his dad take off his belt, all with one swing of the bat....
Last Night's Winner: LeElbow
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the hinge joint in LeBron James's right arm, which exploded into a thousand pieces yesterday, filling the Cleveland sky with bright constellations of bone dust and shard....
The Curious Case Of Jason Bay's Defense
Boston chose not to re-sign Jason Bay, in part, based on his below average defensive metrics. Well, the problem with UZR is that no one really knows how to calculate it; in the latest version, Bay's an above average outfielder....