ja Page 630 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Wizards Now Pretending Gilbert Arenas Never Existed
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Seahawks Shack Up With Pete Carroll As If He Were A Grad Student Living In Malibu
Pete Carroll has come to terms with Seattle, according to the stuffed animals at Adam Schefter's tea party. He'll be introduced just as soon as the Seahawks find a minority in whom to feign interest. [ESPN]...
Seahawks About To Land Pete Carroll?
"Pete Carroll is the guy Seahawks are targeting. It is expected to happen," according to Chris Mortensen's imaginary friends. [@mortreport, LAT]...
The One Where The LA Angels Catcher's Mom Accidentally Shows Her Nipple On New Year's Eve
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another. (NSFW)...
They're Just Mining Your Childhood For Ideas Now
LeBron and Dwight Howard have teamed up to film an update of the landmark McDonald's HORSE commercial. Spoiler: the game ends when Howard is unable to hit a free throw five times in a row....
Craig James Has Picked An Excellent Time To Get Into Politics
James, the ESPN analyst who has not yet pissed off the entire state of Texas, is apparently eyeing Kay Bailey Hutchison's seat in the Senate. Don't laugh. The man has plenty of experience appealing to the largess of wealthy donors....
Presenting The Absolute Worst Hall Of Fame Voter (Update)
In all the foofaraw over the HOF elections, one voter stands above the rest in terms of sheer ineptitude and self-promotion. Let's ridicule them! But first, the runners up:...
The 2009 Oakland Raiders: A Season Of Failure
The Oakland Raiders were once a proud, victorious franchise, but despite zero ownership changes in over 30 years they become an organization synonymous with "ineptitude." The 2009 campaign didn't reverse this spectacular descent....
Children Will Crush Your Playoff Dreams. The Wild Card Jamboroo
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Fight's Off, At Least Until It's On Again
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Crittenton Cocked And Loaded? Arenas Taking The Fall?
When Gilbert got suspended indefinitely with no word on any punishment for Javaris Crittenton, it raised a ton of questions. Now comes word that this "practical joke" might have been scarier than reported; and Arenas might be covering Crittenton's ass....
A Fitting End To The Raiders' Season
JaMarcus Russell reportedly blew off the year's final team meeting to hang out at the Palms in Vegas. I hear they have an excellent breakfast buffet there. [Oakland Tribune]...
"I Like To Fight In The Nude" - Behind Kobe Bryant Deathmatch Fiction
What if Kobe and LeBron fought to the death? We go inside the mind of the man who's played out that scenario in gory, hilarious detail....
Jayson Williams Probably Shouldn't Leave The House
The former Nets center, who is free on bail awaiting a new trial stemming from that messy dead limo driver situation, was accused of drunkenly driving his SUV into a tree last night around 3:15 a.m by (karma) police. [NYP]...
<em>Forbes</em> Wins The Race To Declare NBA Players "Thugs"
And there it is, right on time. "Many NBA players carry guns and the league is full of thugs," according to something called Michael Ozanian, national editor at Forbes, of all places....
Indecisive Hurdler Discovers Breast Implants Don't Improve Leaping Ability
Australia's Jana Rawlinson was not happy with her body's natural curves, so like a lot of women, she decided to get breast implants. Then she remembered that she was an Olympic-caliber hurdler and silicon is heavier than air....
Arenas-Crittenton Standoff Just A Hilarious Inside Joke Gone Awry
Everyone is still trying to make sense of the Washington Bullets' (redux) guns-a-blazin' locker room showdown, but according to the latest version it simply resulted from a misinterpreted zinger about attempted murder. Some people have no sense of humor....
Masochist USC Punishes Self For Mayo Shenanigans
Ah, January, when the talk turns from NCAA football sanctions to NCAA basketball sanctions. First up: USC. It's as predictable as the changing of the seasons....
And Here Are The New Fake Nike LeBron Shoes
Yes, they're orange and blue. Yes, they have a version of the I ♥ NY logo on the soles. UPDATE: Flim-flammery!...
Rocket's Red Glare Too Much For Blue Jay
NBA players pull guns on each other in the locker room. MLB players shoot themselves in the face with fireworks. And we wonder why kids don't dream of being baseball players anymore....