k Page 2112 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Marlins Plan: Now That We've Traded Away Beloved Players And Alienated Fans, Let's Increase Ticket Revenue
The Miami Herald is publishing a five-part series on the Marlins’ new front office’s plans for the team, and per today’s introductory piece, the essence of CEO Derek Jeter’s strategy is something like this: Make big payroll cuts by trading away the team’s most popular players, increase gate revenue ...
<i>Jeopardy!</i> Is A Harsh Mistress
Nick Spicher was embroiled in the Jeopardy! equivalent of an NFL replay review when he gave an incorrect response to the following before/after clue in Monday’s episode: “A song by Coolio from ‘Dangerous Minds’ goes back in time to become a 1667 John Milton classic.”...
Christian Pulisic Rings In The New Year With A Powerful And Absolutely Legit Slam Dunk
Christian Pulisic—the wonderteen, the nation’s best and most favored soccer man, an elite athlete blessed with speed and agility and hops we don’t normally associate with slight, diminutive whiteboys—had himself a (mostly) great 2017. To commemorate his metaphorical ascent to the heights of the spor...
If The UFC Wants Conor McGregor To Defend His Belt, They Should Pay Up<em></em>
What’s your favorite Conor McGregor title defense? Since catching Eddie Alvarez reaching a few days after the 2016 election to nab the lightweight championship, the Irishman hasn’t fought in the UFC. He earned the featherweight belt in 2015 by unhooking Jose Aldo’s jaw in 13 seconds, but the UFC re-...
Bad Quarterback Performance Of The Week: Kirk Cousins Is Cold And Wants To Go Home
Welcome to Bad Quarterback Performance Of The Week, a recurring feature in which we celebrate the worst quarterback play the NFL has to offer....
Polish Skier Finishes Downhill Race On A Single Ski
Pawel Babicki finished 67th out of 67 competitors at a downhill race last week in Bormio, Italy. He trailed eventual winner Dominik Paris by 36 seconds, which is all the more impressive considering that Babicki lost his left ski before the halfway point of the famous Stelvio downhill run....
I Don't Really Know What To Make Of The U.S. Olympic Men's Hockey Team
During Monday’s Winter Classic, USA Hockey revealed the rosters for next month’s Olympics. And because of the NHL’s refusal to release its players (though the IOC is more deserving of the blame), the men’s team is weird as hell:...
Oh Shit, DeMar DeRozan Might Be Able To Shoot Threes Now<em></em>
Raptors guard DeMar DeRozan has always been able to score—he’s averaged more than 20 points a night in each of the past four seasons, with his 2016-17 points per game average of 27.3 putting him fifth among all NBA players. One way he was never able to do it, however, was from long range. Since his ...
UCF Deserves A Shot, But At Whose Expense?
It was a day of statements, with Alabama emphatically proving they belonged in the playoff and Georgia delivering a classic 2OT win. But no statement was louder than Central Florida’s 34-27 win over No. 7 Auburn, and UCF’s players and coaches weren’t shy about making the subtext text....
Georgia's Defense Made The Difference
It’s almost hard to remember, given how much happened from halftime on, but there was a point in Monday’s Rose Bowl when it looked like Oklahoma had the game all locked up. As Georgia desperately tried to make a goal line stand while down 24-14 in the final minute of the second quarter, OU pulled ou...
Alabama Beats Clemson, Sets Up All-SEC Championship Game
Alabama manhandled top seed Clemson 24-6 in a downer of a Sugar Bowl unworthy of being the headliner to the double-OT Rose Bowl opening act, and now you’re all going to enjoy a week of gripes about the SEC and the Tide vs. Georgia national championship matchup. Our response to those complaints is th...
Georgia Beats Oklahoma In Double-OT; Here's How The Winning Score Sounded Around The World
Sony Michel’s touchdown in double-overtime gave Georgia a 54-48 Rose Bowl win over Oklahoma and made up for a late fumble that resulted in six points for the Sooners. Here are how both teams’ radio announcers as well as national and international broadcasters called the winning touchdown:...
Report: Packers Strip Ted Thompson Of GM Duties, Fire A Few Coaches
One day after falling to the Lions and locking up their first losing season since 2008, the Green Bay Packers will make several changes. Ted Thompson has been with the team since 1992—save for a four-year spell in Seattle—and he served as the team’s general manager from 2005 until today, when he was...
Sean Payton And Dirk Koetter Get Into Weird Chest-Slapping Contest During Postgame Handshake
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers beat the New Orleans Saints 31-24 Sunday, and although the game didn’t carry too much weight, there were clearly feelings left over from the two teams’ first divisional matchup in November. During the postgame handshake, Saints head coach Sean Payton gave Bucs head coach Dir...
UCF Completes 13-0 Season
With a 34-27 win over Auburn in the Peach Bowl, the UCF Knights confirmed their status as the only undefeated team in this season of college football, improving to 13-0 in head coach Scott Frost’s final game before leaving for Nebraska. ...
I Can't Stop Watching These Buffalo Bills Celebration Videos
The Bills on Sunday ended an 18-year playoff drought, the longest active postseason dry spell in major U.S. sports. Understandably, Bills players and fans were pretty stoked. Some of this cathartic merriment was caught on video, and the spontaneity and genuine joy of it all makes for some fine hango...
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
If Christmas is all about putting stuff up butts, New Year’s Day is the day to read about the many methods of absolute destruction of America’s dick and balls, and to be thankful it wasn’t you. Unless it was....
ESPN: Our Employee Jon Gruden Will Be Next Raiders Coach
ESPN is reporting its employee Jon Gruden will leave the company after eight years and take his turkey hole to the Raiders, where he started his head coaching career 20 years ago. The deal to bring Gruden back to coaching could include giving him a chunk of team ownership, again according to ESPN. ...
Falcons Earn Another Chance To Spectacularly Choke In The Playoffs<em></em>
Most of you likely recall last year’s Super Bowl between Atlanta and New England, in which the Falcons somehow blew a 28-3 lead and let Tom Brady claim yet another championship. But many of you may also be shocked to hear that the Falcons weren’t immediately banned from all future postseasons after ...
Kyle Williams And Bills Go With <i>Any Given Sunday</i> Celebration After Touchdown
Defensive lineman Kyle Williams has played for the Buffalo Bills for 12 seasons. Today could be his last game. With the Bills on the goal line in the third quarter, the team lined up the defensive tackle at fullback—and handed him the ball....