k Page 2529 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
At Least Kobe Bryant Has A Sense Of Humor About All Of This
The NBA has never really seen anything like what Kobe Bryant is doing right now. After shooting 7-for-26 in a loss to the godawful Sixers last night (he shot 4-of-17 from three, for chrissakes!), Kobe’s season statistics are just about the grimmest thing you’ll ever see. He’s currently shooting 30 p...
Fake NBA Team Beats Fake NBA Team For Sad First Win
The Los Angeles Lakers’ 2-14 unstoppable suck came up against the Philadelphia 76ers’ 0-18 unmovable wall of shit in Philadelphia Tuesday night. Something had to give, and on this night it was the Lakers, who despite the better record are probably the worse team, and lost 103-91....
What's The Most Baller Thing A President Can Do? Send A Boring Soccer Game To Penalties In The 63rd Minute.
Sometimes, you’re sitting around watching a drab draw and you’re like “Bruh, I wish y’all could wrap this up.” Sometimes, you’re also a country’s preeminent political leader, and you have the power to make it happen. Allegedly....
Lionel Messi Was Already A Baller As A 12-Year-Old In Argentina
Here are some highlights from a Newell’s Old Boys vs. El Torito youth match back in October of 1999. If your struck by the kid in the red and white number 10 jersey and his uncannily familiar way of freezing some defenders solid with his dribbling and nipping the ball away from others right at the v...
Watch DeAndre Jordan Miss 22 Free Throws In One Game
Clippers center DeAndre Jordan made a bit of NBA history last night, tying the record for most missed free throws in a game. While getting maimed by the Trail Blazers’ hack-a-Jordan strategy, Jordan bricked 22 freebies....
Ravens Return Blocked Field Goal For TD With No Time Left To Beat Browns
We weren’t looking forward to tonight’s Monday Night Football matchup between the 2-8 Browns and the 3-7 Ravens—neither was ESPN—but dammit if it didn’t turn out to be an incredibly exciting game, with the most batshit insane ending of the year....
Off-Duty Cops Really Want To Bring Their Guns Into NFL Stadiums
Earlier this month the National Fraternal Order of Police sent a letter to NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, urging him to allow off-duty law enforcement officers to bring their guns into NFL stadiums. The Fraternal Order of Police believes that if off-duty cops have their guns, they will be able to p...
Jahlil Okafor Lays Bare One Of The Flaws With The Process
Nothing good ever happens after midnight. Nothing good ever happens after midnight. Nothing good ever happens after midnight. The saying isn’t actually true—many of the best things happen after midnight, in fact—but it’s a mantra Jahlil Okafor would’ve done well to internalize over the past two mont...
Scooby-Doo Theme Songs, Ranked
The notion of a jock, a grind, a beauty queen, a burnout, and a large, anthropomorphic canine piling into a detailed van to solve mysteries has proven indisputably, irresistibly evergreen. In the 46 years since Joe Ruby and Ken Spears co-midwifed Scooby-Doo, this franchise has become a cross-media j...
Edmonton Wins Cup
The Edmonton Eskimos defeated the Ottawa Redblacks 26-20 Sunday and won their first Grey Cup since 2005. Here’s where we’d say you wasted your time watching another week of regular-season NFL, but the 4 p.m. Steelers-Seahawks game was pretty damn good. The Grey Cup was good, too....
Michael Jordan's Ghost Is Retiring, At Fucking Last
This will be Kobe Bryant’s final season. He announced it yesterday, and the news made me think, instantly, of Michael Jordan. The last, greatest, and most devoted of his followers is passing; it’s the latest and most final-seeming of his many deaths, the destruction of his last on-court horcrux. Do ...
There's Never A Bad Time To Enjoy Some Vintage Shaq Highlights
For no particular reason, let’s take a moment to gawk at some of Shaquille O’Neal’s best highlights....
Our Roomba Vacuumed The House With Dog Shit
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. Are you dirty? Email her....
Kevin Durant Blasts Media For Criticizing Kobe Bryant
If Derek Jeter’s retirement tour is any guide, Kobe Bryant’s final season is going to be a victory lap, with everyone competing to fawn over the career of a guy who, admittedly, was one of the most important players in the modern NBA. But that’s not enough for Kevin Durant, who took the media to tas...
Robert Flores Says No One's Mad About Travis Kelce's Touchdown Dance Because He's White
During today’s highlight of Travis Kelce’s touchdown dance from Sunday’s game against the Bills, SportsCenter’s Robert Flores openly wondered why no one was up in arms over the Chiefs’ tight end hitting the Quan. After all, Cam Newton caught hell for reveling in the Panthers’ win over the Titans two...
Calvin Pryor Blames Rishard Matthews's Injury On Ryan Tannehill's Bad Throw
On the Dolphins’ third play from scrimmage in their 38-20 loss to the Jets, Ryan Tannehill threw a short pass behind Rishard Matthews. When Matthews turned for the ball—it went past him—Jets safety Calvin Pryor slammed into Matthews’s torso. He would leave the game with what were described as rib an...
Former Teammates Perform Haka At Rugby Legend Jonah Lomu's Funeral
New Zealand rugby star Jonah Lomu died at the age of 40 earlier this month. At his funeral today, many of his former All Blacks teammates performed a traditional haka as pallbearers carried Lomu’s casket. ...
Odell Beckham's Catch Was Absolutely Ridiculous, Again
It makes you wonder how the Giants ever lose a game, when they can seemingly just throw a football anywhere within his gravity well and he’ll pull it in....
Hassan Whiteside Pens Moving Tribute To Kobe Bryant
Kobe Bryant’s retirement announcement will surely bring an outpouring of tributes from his fellow players, both young and old. A lot of these guys grew up idolizing Bryant, and now they have to say goodbye. What does one even say in this situation? How do you even begin to thank Kobe for all that he...