k Page 2565 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

<i>Purity </i>Went To Communist East Germany And Found Itself
We’ll move further along in Purity in just a moment. First, I want to relay the story of what happened the first time I opened the book up after the last dispatch, in which I discussed how much truer and more knowledgeably written Jonathan Franzen’s one-paragraph description of Santa Cruz’s weather ...

Derrick Rose Has Fractured Orbital Bone, Will Need Surgery
So says the Bulls’ official website. There is no timetable for his return. ...

<i>The Walk</i> Is A Cloying, Uneven Caper With An Absolutely Amazing Final Act
The feat that made Philippe Petit legendary—his tightrope walk between the two towers of the World Trade Center on August 7, 1974—was both brave and insane. What made 2008’s Man on Wire, the Oscar-winning documentary about his achievement, so striking was that despite full access to Petit and his co...

D-III Wide Receiver Uses Foot To Make Insane Catch
Junior wide receiver Ilir Emini from D-III Knox College in Illinois made the catch of his life in Saturday’s game against Lawrence University, and it’s totally okay that you don’t recognize any of those proper nouns (besides Illinois)....

Arsenal Keeper Fucks Everything Up, Scores On His Damn Self
Is this a David Ospina own goal? A Konstantinos Fortounis olímpico? Either way, it’s absolutely a crime against keeping....

True Tales Of Lube And Laundry
On this episode of the official Ask a Clean Person podcast, Casey Johnston and Cesar Torres of The Sweethome joined me to talk about the wonderful work their site does in testing all manner of household products, from brooms and label-makers to mascara and sex toys....

The Story Behind Dashiell Hammett's Last And Most Popular Book
The following is excerpted from Nathan Ward’s The Lost Detective, a new book about the early life of Dashiell Hammett, one of the greatest crime writers in history....

Aaron Rodgers Moving Around Is Its Own Kind Of Highlight
Watching Aaron Rodgers play quarterback is the most satisfying experience that the NFL currently has to offer, so we’re gonna go ahead and keep throwing confetti on him on a regular basis. We’ve been over his arm strength and ridiculous accuracy, but last night’s performance was all about that other...

Kid At Rangers Game Won't Stop Flexing And Kissing His Biceps
The Tigers and Rangers might have been playing Monday night, but the real entertainment was in the stands. One kid in a Rangers shirt refused to stop flexing and kissing his biceps until his mom shut down the gun show....

The Gentleman's Guide To Making Her Come Without Using Your Dick
It’s time to be honest about something women don’t talk about much: the orgasm deficit. A large majority of women can’t reach orgasm from penis-in-vagina intercourse alone—as few as 7 percent can climax regularly from this method—and, worse, some men don’t seem to even realize it! Too often, well-in...

SMU Basketball Banned From Postseason, Head Coach Larry Brown Suspended Nine Games
The NCAA just hit the Southern Methodist University men’s basketball program with some heavy sanctions, including a one-year postseason ban, scholarship reductions, vacation of wins, and a nine-game suspension for head coach Larry Brown. This is all happening because an NCAA investigation revealed t...

Kevin Johnson’s Shitbaggery, Explained
Over the past year, our Dave McKenna has reported on a number of sordid scandals surrounding former NBA All-Star and current Sacramento mayor Kevin Johnson, culminating in this painful account from a woman who has accused Johnson of sexually abusing her when she was a teenager. Even by the standards...

The Chiefs Finally Put An End To Football's Silliest Streak
I can appreciate a good sports streak as much as anyone, but the dumb ones are always more fun than the actually impressive ones. Which is why last night’s Chiefs-Packers game was, despite Aaron Rodgers’s continued brilliance, kind of a bummer. The Chiefs, for the first time in 18 regular-season gam...

There Are Officially No More Excuses For Not Running A Personal-Best Marathon
Kenyan Eliud Kipchoge proved in Sunday’s Berlin Marathon that he is the classiest human to ever lay down 26.2 miles at an average of 4:44 per. About 10 miles into the race, the insoles of his custom Nike racing flats slipped out halfway and stayed there for the remaining 16 miles, flapping like tong...

Here's Trevor Noah's First <i>Daily Show </i>Monologue, Which Totally Didn't Suck
You only watch a late-night talk show in full, on actual television, at the appointed hour, twice: the host’s first episode, and his last. So say hello to Trevor Noah, your new Daily Show host, who awkwardly plows right through his inaugural applause and Just Gets On With It. He was okay! This is go...

Female Ex-Coaches Accuse UMD Of Discrimination, Harassment, Anti-Canadian Sentiment In Lawsuit
Three former women’s coaches at the University of Minnesota Duluth sued the state’s university system in federal court today, all saying they were victims of discrimination while working for the university. In the lawsuit, each woman outlines her own story and the various ways in which she was haras...

"Eat A Whole Can Of Chewing Tobacco," And More Terrible Reader Dares
On Friday, we asked you to tell us about the craziest dare you ever accepted. You all came back with stories of eating things you shouldn’t have eaten, getting naked in places you shouldn’t have gotten naked, and doing various things you definitely shouldn’t have done—especially since in many cases,...

Can The Broncos Figure Out How To Use Peyton Manning?
No battle plan survives contact with the enemy. On paper, it made all the sense in the world for Gary Kubiak to reimagine the Broncos offense, emphasizing the run more, and lining up his quarterback in different positions to keep opponents off-balance. In practice, Peyton Manning doesn’t like taking...

19 Oktoberfest Beers, Ranked
America’s biggest BeerCon went down in Colorado over the weekend, and Drunkspin’s Rocky Mountain correspondent will be along later in the week to tell you all about it. I couldn’t make it to the Great American Beer Festival myself, as it did not take place in the park across the street from my apart...

EL-P On The New Cat-Rap Classic <i>Meow The Jewels</i>: "It's A Lonely And Strange Thing"
Embrace the moment: One of the most feverishly anticipated hip-hopalbums of the year is finally here, and it’s made up almost entirely of sampled cat sounds. It’s called Meow the Jewels, and you can download it for free right here, and its backstory is now the stuff of internet (and cat) lore. It st...