k Page 2884 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Tennis Player Scolded By Cranky Announcer: "Oh Do Shut Up, Jelena"
Some drama went down during a quarterfinal match between Serena Williams and Jelena Jankovic at the Dubai Duty Free Tennis Championships yesterday. The drama was made all the better by the presence of a fussy British TV announcer who decided that it was a good day to do some scoldin'....

The Last-Minute Hater's Guide To Canada
If you're as dedicated as I am to not doing anything, you're surely spending this afternoon watching the United States square off against Canada in the Olympic ice hockey semifinals. CANADA! Those horse-mounting salmon eaters needed to bribe a fucking post yesterday just to beat our women's team. ...

Paranoia: It Really Works
Billy Martin proved what a powerful strategic tool paranoia is. He believed that everyone was against him. And so he spent every waking moment figuring out how imaginary enemies could be defeated in their nefarious plots. And sometimes he not only created strategies to defend against things that wou...

Down With The NCAA's No-Agent Rule
Originally published on Bloomberg View....

Rex And Rob Ryan Hit Up Hooters, Because Of Course They Do
Rex and Rob Ryan are in Indianapolis for the NFL scouting combine, and the brothers found some time to swing by the local Hooters for a photo op, once again confirming every assumption you've ever had about the Ryan brothers. Bless these men....

Jermaine O'Neal Makes Game-Saving Block, Is Very Pleased With Himself
You can give Steph Curry the credit for last night's Warriors' victory if you want to—he did tie the game with a preposterous layup at the end of regulation before scoring seven points in OT, after all—but I prefer to think that this game belonged to old-ass Jermaine O'Neal....

OJ Mayo Ties His Shoe While Playing Defense, Play Goes Poorly
Remember that time Mike Miller lost his shoe during the Heat's comeback in game 6 of the finals, ran around holding it, and then drained a three to cut the Spurs' lead? OK, good: now imagine the opposite. ...
![It's Been A Horrible Two Days For Fred Davis [Mug Shot Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/19gdlqp7vmy4ijpg.jpg)
It's Been A Horrible Two Days For Fred Davis [Mug Shot Update]
Above is a photo, sent to us by a reader, of Redskins TE Fred Davis being arrested yesterday afternoon in Tyson's Corner, Va. Fairfax County police confirmed Davis was charged with driving under the influence—in his year-old Rolls-Royce Phantom—but no further updates were available on his status thi...

Upstart Program Defeats In-State Powerhouse, Celebrates Appropriately
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

The Battle Lines Are Drawn
The CBC's Douglas Gelevan tweeted out the above photo, of the Mountain Broadcast Center. We are three hours away from the U.S. vs. Canada in men's hockey, and North America's best and friendliest rivalry is proving as divisive among the media as it is in whatever trolly corner of the internet you pl...

LeBron James Is Capable Of Bleeding
LeBron James took a hit to the nose in the fourth quarter of tonight's Heat-Thunder game, and proved he's mortal by bleeding on the floor. But he still completed the dunk after getting smacked in the nose by Serge Ibaka, which is damn impressive. ...

Mike Williams's Neighbors Hate Him And His Extravagant Parties
Tampa Bay Bucs receiver Mike Williams isn't very popular in his community. He and a few friends are renting a house in Tampa, and neighbors seem to despise them....

Was The Figure Skating Fix In? It Probably Didn't Matter.
Russia's Adelina Sotnikova delivered a shocking upset Thursday, when she–not reigning world and Olympic champion Yuna Kim, not former world champion Carolina Kostner, not even 15-year-old Yulia Lipnitskaya, who had been pegged for weeks as the co-favorite–won Olympic gold in women's figure skating. ...

Why Does NBC's Primetime Figure Skating Broadcast Suck?
For the past few weeks, I've been having a problem. My job, such as it is, has been to watch the Olympic figure skating competitions and to then write about it for this website. So nearly every day, clad in my pajamas and sporting my best last-panel-of-a-Cathy-comic hair, I've loaded up the NBC live...

The NBA Trade Deadline Was Mostly Craptastic
The NBA trade deadline came and went today, and unless you are a fan of the Indiana Pacers or Philadelphia 76ers, you probably don't give a damn about anything that happened. This wasn't quite the flurry of crap that we saw last year, but it was close....


Rob Ford Gets Air
Toronto mayor Rob Ford took a few hours off from not working to watch Canada prevail in the women's hockey gold medal game. This is the moment of victory at Toronto City Hall. For as bad as you may feel for the American players, save your sympathy for Ford's knees....

Bill Simmons Had Lena Dunham On His Podcast; Here Are Things They Said
Multiplatform presence Bill Simmons had thought leader Lena Dunham on his podcast today. Since you are probably at work and unable to listen, we pulled out some of the things they said so that you can read them....

Canadians Freaking Out Over Winning Hockey Gold Is Just Fantastic
People spend their whole lives looking for something to love like Canadians love hockey. So what happens when you throw in a sudden death win for a gold medal? ...
