k Page 3407 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Alleged Red Sox Fan Gets Her Face Kicked At Yankee Stadium
Please, sports viewing world, do not judge all Yankee fans by these hooligans with their bootleg name-on-the-back-jerseys, they were just defending themselves from this aggressive alleged Red Sox fan who lost her way. The Yankees may have been listless against the Tigers this afternoon, but these ...

Here's Gus Johnson Calling The San Jose Earthquakes' Exciting Last-Second Win
We heard last week from our friends at Awful Announcing that excitable announcer Gus Johnson had picked up the strange gig of calling MLS games on radio for the San Jose Earthquakes. We tuned in tonight, and were not disappointed. While our emeritus editor Will Leitch has concluded that Johnson's...

LeBron James Has Ushered In The NBA Playoffs Flop Era
While debate continues to rage in regard to whether Tyson Chandler's screen on LeBron James today really accounted for a flagrant foul, there's no doubt that LeBron augmented the impact with his own brand of thespianism. The incident set Jeff Van Gundy off on another rant about flopping, and is a ...

Here's Something You Don't See Every Day: Adam Schefter Reports Derrick Rose Is Out For The Year With A Torn ACL
Moments ago, Adam Schefter just interrupted ESPN's wall-to-wall coverage of the NFL Draft and announced that Rose will miss the rest of the playoffs with a torn ACL following that awkward play in the final minutes of Chicago's game today....

New Seattle Seahawk Bobby Wagner Was In The Shitter When He Was Drafted
In one of the more appropriate instances of places to find out you got drafted by the Seattle Seahawks, Utah State linebacker Bobby Wagner learned the news while he was in the bathroom. Wagner was interrupted, but full of joy nonetheless....

Derrick Rose Injured In Final Minutes Of Game 1 Win Over Philadelphia 76ers
For some reason, Derrick Rose was on the court for the Chicago Bulls with a 12-point lead and a little more than a minute left in the series opener against the Sixers. Driving to the basket, he planted awkwardly and almost immediately fell out of midair in pain. Chicago would go on to win the batt...

Michigan Costumed Vigilante Arrested Following Trailer Park Brawl
Where to begin? Let's start with the Michigan Protectors. The self proclaimed "costumed activists" work to set up neighborhood watches and are part of an online community known as "Real Life Super Heroes." Just so we're all on the same page though, these people do not have super powers, despite wha...

May The Dongs Be With You: The Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions
Lets jump right into the dongs. Today we begin with Luke Skywalker and his scruffy looking nerfherder dangling between his legs thanks to reader Jeff. As always, be sure to support our dong endeavors and send in any would-be penises to the tips department. ...

Reports: Matt Leinart To Sign With Oakland Raiders
Look out Bay Area, here comes the party (and lifetime 57.6 completion percentage). Friend of the program, Matt Leinart is ready to move on from his backup role in Houston to a new backup role with the Oakland Raiders. According to Adam Schefter, Leinart will sign with the Raiders and immediately be...

Rich Eisen Went Berserk When The Jaguars Drafted A Punter
The Jacksonville Jaguars stupidly picked punter Bryan Anger in the third round last night, a pick that shocked experts and Jags fans alike....

Jeremy Guthrie on 15-Day Disabled List Because He Is A Bicycle-Riding Hippie
Jeremy Guthrie, who may have more in common with Arlo than previously thought, will "miss a couple starts" according to Rockies' manager Jim Tracy with some right AC joint pain....

Scott Hairston Hits For Cycle, Mets Get Clobbered
Scott Hairston did that cool and meaningless thing where a player gets all the different kinds of hits possible in one game. Sadly, it was not a "natural" cycle, an even more meaningless occurrence made remarkable by the order in which the hits are made. The Mets, on the other hand, did that uncool...

Russell Wilson's Wife Provides Us With Our Favorite Face Of The Draft
Seattle chose quarterback Russell Wilson in the third round of last night's NFL Draft, and his wife of three months was so excited she immediately began the metamorphosis to boa constrictor....

Mohamed Sanu Drafted By The Cincinnati Bengals, No Seriously—The Bengals Drafted Him Friday Night
The Rutgers wide receiver was projected to go in the second or third round, and after a prank call pump fake on day one, he actually did go in the third round to the team he thought picked him in the first round....
![Here's Umpire Jeff Kellogg Tackling A Streaker At Tonight's A's-Orioles Game [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Here's Umpire Jeff Kellogg Tackling A Streaker At Tonight's A's-Orioles Game [UPDATE]
Jeff Kellogg was behind the plate for tonight's A's-Orioles game, when during the Seventh Inning Stretch a shirtless fan came onto the field and (painfully, we imagine) slid headfirst into home plate....

Phillies Broadcaster Wanted Call Appealed, So He Shouted From The Booth And Hoped The Team Would Hear Him
Larry Andersen knew what he had seen here on Wednesday: that Diamondbacks shortstop Willie Bloomquist forgot to re-touch third base on his way back to second after Carlos Ruiz caught a pop-up in foul territory. And since none of the Phillies noticed, Andersen decided to take matters into his own h...

Joe Posnanski's Book On Joe Paterno Will Be Finished Before The Sandusky Trial
Joe Posnanski didn't go to Happy Valley to write about the unhappy end of Joe Pateno's life and career. He intended it as an eternal Father's Day gift, a sappy and sentimental picture of the aging lion in repose. It was originally scheduled to be released in time for Father's Day, and Posnanski said...

The Most Unwanted Tickets Of The NBA Season Were In New Orleans
Now that the NBA's regular season is over, it's time to wrap-up our analysis of NBA tickets that had the least demand. Once again, we turned to Will Flaherty, the director of communications for SeatGeek, the online ticket search engine that compiles data from hundreds of resellers. This time, Flahe...

Larry Brown's Bloodletting At SMU Has Begun
Larry Brown wields his mighty scythe, cutting three players just 48 hours after being introduced as Mustangs coach. Among them, point guard Jeremiah Samarrippas, who started his first two years. How did Brown break the news to Samarrippas on Wednesday?...

Fun With 69ing Failures
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....