k Page 3412 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
These Brewers Fans Are Especially Concerned About What's On Tap
At first glance, this appears to be your regular "colorful" couple, found in ballparks across the country. Then you realize the guy has a bat, and the entire nature of the evening changes....
Amar'e Stoudemire Returns, Knicks Flunk Chemistry
The ingredients were all there for wild and frothing beakers to report on the Knicks game last night: A Friday night. A terrible opponent. One superstar is introduced to an otherwise stable (for the Knicks, anyway) environment, with basically nothing at stake. And, of course, weeks worth of wonderi...
"I Always Told Her I Would Take Her For A Ride": Notes From Bobby Petrino's Meeting With Arkansas Before They Fired Him
"I am still looking for ways you can remain our coach," Arkansas athletic director Jeff Long wrote in his prepared notes before a meeting with Bobby Petrino. It was April 8, and the university would fire Petrino with cause two days later. "Help me understand why this [sic] are not violations of your...
The Sacramento Kings Are Now So Desperate That They're Marketing To Old Stoners
Are you a Sacramento Kings fan? Ha, no, shut up, you're not. They're half a game ahead of last place in the West, 2-8 in their last 10, headed for the lottery again. They're probably leaving town. Who would ever want to go to a Kings game?...
LOL OMG NHL: Hockey Goes After The BuzzFeed Generation
Our friends at Jezebel pointed us to this post on BuzzFeed: "The Hottest Guys In The NHL." It's a standard BuzzFeed numbered list of large photos, with a sentence or two apiece, perfectly designed to be shared around Facebook and Pinterest by a very specific subset of the internet. But the top text ...
Unpopular Sport Forms "Strategic Promotional Alliance" With Band That Sucks
Big announcement today from the NHL. So big it merited a press release that maunders on for nearly 1,000 words. You're not going to bother reading it, but here's the gist: The NHL has an awards show on June 20 in Las Vegas. It has hired Nickelback to be the headlining band. It's hailing the move as ...
It's Hell Becoming A Comfortable And Wealthy Old Filmmaker
It's the fear of any successful creative person, anyone who started their career as a young buck with fire in the belly, all the ambition in the world, all the idealism of the new and stupid: What happens when you make it? What happens when you achieve your goals, early in your life, and you have to...
Pedro Martinez And Kevin Millar Delivered A Boozy, Awkward Toast To Fenway Before Today's Game
A lengthy ceremony recognizing the 100th anniversary of Fenway Park before today's Yankees-Red Sox game came to a close with former Sox stars Kevin Millar and Pedro Martinez offering a toast, sort of, to the stadium—while sounding a bit like they'd been rehearsing it for some time. (The Red Sox a...
Posting A Facebook Photo From The London Olympics Could Land You In Court
Art by Ronald Wigman....
Better Know An Umpire: Tom Hallion
Welcome to Better Know An Umpire, an effort to educate ourselves on the human elements who have ultimate decision-making power over some 2,500 Major League Baseball games a year. (All cumulative statistics are through the 2011 season, unless otherwise stated.)...
Derek Jeter Is Still Trying To Sell His Apartment (Now $2 Million Cheaper!)
Time (again) to picture what it would be like to be the next owner of Derek Jeter's apartment, where he's lived for the last 11 years....
Czech Women Will Use You As A Bodyguard
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Oregon Father And Son Build 1/3-Scale Fenway Park Replica On Their Farm
What was your backyard like? Perhaps you had a tire swing, or a play structure, or an above-ground pool. My yard abutted wetlands; mosquitos rose angrily every spring. Chances are, whatever you had, it wasn't as cool as what Jim Maciariello and his son Ben built in Drain, Oregon....
For Just $34.99 Plus Tax Plus Shipping And Handling, This Plain White Cap Can Be Yours
To celebrate the hundredth anniversary of Fenway Park, both the Highlanders Yankees and the Red Sox will be wearing 1912 throwback uniforms for this afternoon's game. Here's New York's old-timey duds; here's Boston's. ...
The Suns Shut Down And Beat Up Blake Griffin
Blake Griffin was unstoppable in the first quarter, going 7-for-13 from the field. Phoenix regrouped, and turned the game into something more closely rembling Atari's Basketbrawl, and what do you know: it worked. Griffin didn't score another field goal the rest of the game....
A Frozen Clock Was Nearly Disastrous In The Caps-Bruins Game
With 9.5 seconds left and the Capitals up by a goal, the puck was dropped in Washington's zone. But for more than five seconds, the clock refused to start. The Bruins cycled it around, with Patrice Bergeron getting off a shot just at the buzzer. It was thankfully blocked, because a score there wou...
College Newspaper Captures Euphoria Of Historic Upset With Headline Alluding To Masturbation
Division II Francis Marion University (S.C.) knocked off defending Division I national champ South Carolina in a baseball game on April 11. FMU's student paper is a weekly, and even though the edition chronicling the big win wasn't published until this week, the upset was still enough to merit front...
Michael Bourn Holds Up The Game With A Bathroom Break
When you gotta go, you gotta go. For most of us, that means quietly taking a break before we resume whatever it is we were doing. For Michael Bourn, last night it meant the start of the bottom of the fourth inning in Arizona had to be delayed, since everyone noticed the Braves had taken the field ...
Report: Billy Hunter Moves To Push Derek Fisher Out As Union President
Can't say this one comes as much of a surprise, but NBA Players Association honcho Billy Hunter has finally started his move to force out union president Derek Fisher, a guard for the Oklahoma City Thunder, after five years on the job. Theoretically, Fisher has two years remaining in his role as uni...
Sports-Loving President Forces Ice Hockey On His Poor Desert Nation
This man is Kurbanguly Berdymukhamedov, and he is the president of Turkmenistan. He is wearing this ridiculous ice hockey jersey because he demanded that his country's sports-minded officials build an ice hockey arena in the capital city of Ashgabat, and when you win reelection with 97 percent of th...