k Page 3648 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Even The Top Seed In The Playoffs Isn't Good Enough For This Expressive Bulls Fan
Your morning roundup for April 9, the day it became painfully evident that knowledge gleaned from the Old Testament and YouTube videos do not a professional at-home circumcisionist make....
109-Year-Old Woman Throws Ceremonial First Pitch Like A Girl
Today we salute Violet Smith, who celebrated her 109th birthday by throwing out the first pitch at opening day for the Great Lakes Loons on Thursday. We're impressed by her form — an overhand with a follow-through! — and by her being very much alive....
We Are All Dave McKenna LXIV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit gets its teeth rapped in with a wrench....
"Got Rings?" T-Shirt Reminds Knicks Fans That Their Team Has Been Bad For Almost 40 Years
Yes, the Knicks have rings, this T-shirt declares. Two of them. From 1970 and 1973. And yes, the NBA store is charging its fans $20 to be reminded of the fact that they've hardly come close since. Available for purchase in orange or blue, shipping and shame not included. Via Bob's Blitz....
Jay-Z Fined $50k For Making Kentucky Freshmen's Dreams Come True
ESPN's Marc Stein reports that the NBA has fined the New Jersey Nets $50k for Jay-Z's visit to the Kentucky Wildcats locker room....
Fox 8 News Provided Us With Both Gloria James's Police Booking And On-Court Attack Videos Free Of Charge
Poor Gloria. Gloria just wanted her car, and Gloria just wanted some kid to foul her son like a considerate human being. We now have this Queen James highlight reel, thanks to the sharing souls at WJW Fox 8 News in Cleveland: Gloria's booking video at the Miami Beach Police Department, accompanied...
Ryan Braun Did Not Actually Suggest Prince Fielder Is A Threat To Your Bag Of Potato Chips
Our friends at Talking Chop spotted something strange during the Brewers-Braves broadcast Thursday afternoon....
Derrick Rose Floats One Off The Glass, And The Bulls Take The East
Last night, the Chicago Bulls defeated the Celtics by 16 points, 97-81. In doing so, they effectively clinched the top seed in the Eastern Conference for the first time since the 1997-98 season — Chicago would have to lose the remainder of its games and the HeatCeltics would have to win the rest o...
Cockblocked By Weed Addiction!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Old Footage Of Gloria James Attacking A Kid On Basketball Court Is Now For Sale
This was a tip sent to Gawker last night from a scuzz-money marketplace entrepreneur who hopes to capitalize on Gloria James's recent valet beatdown. He claims to have footage of Gloria from Lebron's high school days where she goes after a young fella on the court....
Mystery Solved: Courtside Guy At Bulls Games Is Matt Pritzker, And He Is Very, Very Rich
I-Team, you may stand down. So many of you have written in to solve today's mystery about the young fellow who sits courtside at Chicago Bulls games....
I-Team, Do You Know Who This Perpetually Courtside Bulls Fan Is?
Busy day for you guys, we recognize. But tipster Tom has written in with a pressing question:...
New Sport's Inspiration Seems To Be Every Sport Ever At Once
About a year ago, some people in Philadelphia convened to create a new sport that is part football, part rugby, part soccer, part team handball, part cornhole, part — actually, it's just a sport clusterfuck. They're calling it kronum. Some of the athleticism on display in this promotional video fo...
There Were No Fans Or Cars In Attendance At This Incredible High School Dunk Contest
These are the highlights to the first-ever Ballislife All American Dunk Contest, which by our first appraisal seems more impressive than both the McDonald's contest and the one that featured Kias and choruses a few months ago. A few names here you can expect to see in next year's college rounds: A...
College Kid Who Cried "Coach Attacked Me" Apparently Decided To Steal Two Beers From The Phillies
Your morning roundup for April 8, the day the Associated Press union decided to stick it to The Man, with whom it's negotiating a new contract, by not promoting stories on Facebook and Twitter next week. Consequences will never be the same....
It Sure Looks Like This North Dakota Sioux Hockey Fan Has His Jeaned Ass Square In His Wife's Face
Michigan Wolverine forward Scooter Vaughan just scored an empty-net goal and was a mere 35.8 seconds from the NCAA hockey championship game. He was also just about to end the trending North Dakota Sioux's season. That's when guy here got so absorbed in dropping a double on Vaughan that he felt no c...
Big Yankees Fan Offers A Rebecca Black Inspired Production Just In Time For the Red Sox Series
Michael Lapayower is very excited about tomorrow's Yankees game against their rivals, the 0-6 Boston Red Sox. Granted, LaPayower gets very excited about every Yankees game. He probably does the same on off days, even those in the offseason, just thinking about the Yankees....
We Are All Dave McKenna LXIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit faces a shutdown of its own....
Nick Swisher Broke Twins Second Baseman Tsuyoshi Nishioka's Fibula, Patted His Back And Trotted Away
During today's matinee game, Nick Swisher's take-out slide fractured Twins second baseman Tsuyoshi Nishioka's left fibula just below the knee. Afterward, Nishioka, Twins manager Ron Gardenhire and teammates said they felt Swisher made a clean slide sans intent to injure....
Mark Cuban Will Pay College Journalists Something To Do Something With Data About Something Having To Do With Sports
Mark Cuban does not much appreciate this blog, I have learned. Or didn't, once upon a time. In fact, Cuban does not much appreciate sports journalists in general. He's been in the sports biz for 12 years and thinks the "the dumbest guys in the room are always the media guys." Cuban, of course, think...