ks Page 706 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How To Not Suck At Tinder
It's cool to be good at Tinder, but it's far more important that you not be absolutely terrible at Tinder. So for starters, all you men-seeking-women types out there need to learn one important rule: Even if you match with a girl—and let me put this in italics so you'll remember—she has no obligatio...

Let's Look At All The Shitheads Who Thought A Playoff Was A Bad Idea
We'll start with the obvious, which is that the college football playoff was fucking awesome and I am happy that it finally exists. It returned meaningful football games to New Year's Day, which I had missed dearly. It amplified the importance of regular season games, rather than diluting them. I...

Oregon's Mascot Got A Lil' Freaky Last Night
This is Puddles, the cuddly mascot of the Oregon Ducks, getting kinda nasty and baring its, uh, breasts(?) for some fans at last night's national championship game....

OSU Shuts Down Oregon's Offense To Win The National Championship
62. 46. 48. 38. 24. 42. 45. 59. 45. 51. 44. 47. 51. 59. 20. That's how many points Oregon scored each game this season....

Watch Oregon, Ohio State Fans React In Real Time To The 70-Yard TD Play
Here's how Oregon & Ohio State fans reacted live on ESPN's Student Section broadcast to the 70-yard Mariota-to-Marshall touchdown pass....


How To Cook For Yourself Every Day, And Stock Your Kitchen Like A Pro
I love Sundays, but not the way I used to. Time was, it was a day for sleeping in, going to brunch, watching sports, ordering a pizza, dicking around. But here's the new itinerary: Wake up early, go to the farmer's market, buy a boatload of awesome produce (produce being a thing I now consider awe...

Why Ohio State Is A Sneaky-Bad Match-up For Oregon
Oregon looks like a clear favorite over Ohio State in the college football championship game. The markets opened with Oregon as a 7 point favorite, which implies a 70 percent win probability. The predicted margin of victory is even higher with my team rankings based on margin of victory at The Powe...

Hating Sierra Nevada Pale Ale Is For Suckers
One of the only things I dislike about writing this column is that no matter the topic of the day—be it my wife, my cat, the sports teams I root for, or even, on a slow day for me personally, beer—one of you hamless eggers is guaranteed to find a way to tell me that my position is invalid because I'...

Draymond Green And Steph Curry's Family Get Into It With Seahawks Fans
Warriors superstar Steph Curry is a big Carolina Panthers fan, and he was in attendance for the team's road playoff loss to Seattle. At some point, things got a little testy with the home fans, and it was Curry's wife, mother, and teammate Draymond Green in the thick of things....

My God, My God, The Hawks Are A Fucking Juggernaut
The Atlanta Hawks led the Washington Wizards 87-77 after the third quarter yesterday, which isn't nothing as leads go, but, in its broad outline the game still had the feel of one whose outcome could go either way. The Hawks looked sharper, sure, but the Wizards had won the second quarter and got...

The NFL's Rules Are Dumb
The thing we have to establish to be able to talk about this with the same frame of reference is that Dez Bryant didn't catch that football. Oh sure, maybe he had the ball firmly in his grasp, maybe he was confident enough in his possession to turn and lunge for the end zone, wheeling his feet under...

Marshawn Lynch To Every Postgame Question: "I'm Thankful"
Marshawn Lynch had a relatively pedestrian game with 59 total rushing yards—including one impressive 25-yard run—in the Seahawk's 31-17 win over the Panthers, but after the game, the taciturn running back had to answer questions. His response of the week: "I'm thankful."...

Knicks Heroically Win Fourth Quarter By 17, Only Lose By 28
Hey New York resident, how'd you spend the Saturday early afternoon? Maybe finishing up a long brunch? Enjoying a sunny (but chilly) stroll on the High Line? Catching up on the last season of Sherlock? Really, anything would've been great because Saturdays are great and full of promise. Unless you...

Report: Oregon WR Darren Carrington Fails Drug Test, Misses Title Game
Oregon redshirt freshman wide receiver Darren Carrington, one of the team's leading wideouts who caught seven passes for 165 yards and two touchdowns in their destruction of Florida State in the Rose Bowl—didn't travel with the team to Texas yesterday for Monday night's national championship game. T...

Gareth Bale Puts Real Madrid Up 2-0 With An Unstoppable Free Kick
It's tough to imagine a more perfect free kick goal than the one Gareth Bale scored today against Espanyol. We've covered numerous amazing set pieces launched by Cristiano Ronaldo, but Bale's providing evidence that he's the strongest man for the job at Real Madrid....

Former Mavs Big Man Roy Tarpley Passes Away At 50
Roy Tarpley, the talented Dallas Mavericks power forward who flamed out of the NBA due to substance abuse issues, died Friday, at the age of 50. According to The Dallas Morning News there was no official cause of death, but multiple Mavericks officials were informed he had liver failure. ...

Tommy Craggs Is A Prick Who Just Fails Upward
Evidence supporting that fact begins here. This guy actually had the giant sack to put that word in a headline several months ago when something called Suey Park decided to go all Hashtag Amy Uyematsu after Stephen Colbert made a joke at the expense of Daniel Snyder. (Oh, you don't know who "Amy Uy...

Hey, Guy, Just Shake Marc Gasol's Hand
After Tuesday night's game against the Hawks, Grizzlies center Marc Gasol was giving daps to fans as he headed into the locker room. One fan did not want any of Gasol's daps, though, and pulled the ol' pull-the-hand-back-and-rub-your-hair handshake prank....

An Ungodly Monster Of A Stout From Colorado
Last week I told all you big, dirty motherfuckers that we were getting off the imperial stouts for a few. You know, get our heads together, our resolutions set in stone, our children's names remembered, the whole deal. Ha. Check it out: I lied. People who write about beer for half a living will do t...