l Page 7300 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Why Your Team Sucks: Houston Texans
Some people are fans of the Houston Texans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Houston Texans. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Rick Reilly®'s Column Manages To Be Awful In New And Exciting Ways
Rick Reilly® has some kind words for oily mediocrity Rick Neuheisel, a coach whose sole discernible talent is that he tricks people like Rick Reilly® into writing kind words about Rick Neuheisel — and, in this case, into rewriting history....

This Is A Future NFL Linebacker
How did Bengals tight end Chase Coffman develop his "legendary" toughness? You guessed it ... mutton bustin'. [Bengals.com; pic via]...

The Eyes Of Texas Are Upon You
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

NCAA Expands To Canada; Can University Of Phoenix Online Be Far Behind?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Gay Rodeo Rides Bareback Into America's Heart
What's dressed up as a physical competition, but barely beneath the surface bubbles a thick undercurrent of sexual tension among powerful, fit young men? Yes, all sports. But specifically, gay rodeo!...

Nutcase Writes Angry Letters To Odd Mix Of Sports Folk
Also Dan Marino and Lou Holtz, but here's the money quote: "I'm getting ready to start killing some more people. Beyonce, Jay-Z, Jerome Bettis and Tune-up Man are the first 4 people I'm getting ready to kill." [Detroit News]...

Ex-MLB Wife Offering The Girlfriend Experience
For many big leaguers, it looks like they picked their wives fresh off the stage at a strip club. If that's all their wives were doing, they should consider themselves lucky....

The Inexorable Pussification Of Little League Marches On
A 12-year-old boy thought it would be cool to break out the pop-up slide — and tore up his knee in the process. This being America, of course his family sued. So how much money did they get?...

Relax, The Stolen Dennis Rodman Statue Was Not Really A Dennis Rodman Statue
A 70-year-old Vermont gentleman reported that his seven-foot bronze statue of Dennis Rodman was stolen, leading to my favorite story of the week: The AP having to confirm that it was not a Dennis Rodman statue and it wasn't stolen....

Charmin Now The Official Butt Wiping Cloth Of The NFL
No longer content (or rich enough) to rely on cars and beer to fill their advertising accounts, the NFL just inked a $10 million-a-year deal with Proctor & Gamble to designate their crap "Official Locker Room Products of the NFL."...

Deadspin I-Team: The Drill That Dare Not Speak Its Name
The Dallas Morning News has one of those quirky-training-regimen stories today that bloom annually during NFL training camp and which usually involve yoga or interpretive dance or whatever. This one, however, is about an unprintably named tire-flipping drill. I-Team, assemble!...

ESPN Twitter Memo: The Remix
So now that the infamous memo has been passed around to everyone, ESPN has reworked their guidelines for those individuals still confused or incensed by the policy and what they can and cannot do....

Louis CK Is The Best Stand-Up Comic Of His Generation
I did a horrible, awkward podcast with Jeff Garlin a while back, and he complained that standup comedy is never discussed as an art form. Okay Jeff, well let's do that....

Deadspin HOF Nominee: Crossing Pattern Dong
The Deadspin Hall of Fame is not just for individuals: It is for themes, for common bonds, for lasting memes ... for dongs....

There Are Better Ways to Get All Steamy in the City
How often do you stand on the subway platform wishing you were somewhere else? Well today, be somewhere else. Have your friends meet you at the bar—take an open-air vehicle, or walk—and relax with a bucket of Coronas....

Tasers And Foul Balls Make For An Eventful Night In Oakland
At most ballgames, you're lucky if one interesting thing happens in your section. A foul ball, a violent arrest, dudes falling down stairs? Well, some lucky A's fans saw it all in the span of about 30 seconds....

Vince Young Is Learned
About life, crack, stocks, depression, dressing dogs. Oh, and this: "I don't know when I'll start again. But I will be the next black quarterback to win a Super Bowl. And I will be in the Hall of Fame."[Esquire]...

Charles Rogers Blew Ay-Day. AY-DAY
Click to viewIf you ever wondered how former Lions #2 overall pick Charles Rogers turned out to be such a bust, Jemele Hill of ESPN got the answer from him: Construda. Construda AY-DAY....

Deadspin HOF Nominee: Alex Rodriguez
Well, we had to nominate one person whose very name makes you groan, and if we had picked Brett Favre, Drew would have never stopped stabbing me in the eye....